Chapter 59 Chapter 58

Mr. Bingley not only did not receive a letter of apology from his friend for failing to perform the contract as Elizabeth had expected, but also came to Longbourne with Darcy within a few days after Mrs. Caitlin's visit.The two distinguished guests came early.Jane sat there all the time apprehensive lest her mother tell Darcy to his face the news of his aunt's visit, but before Mrs. Bennet could tell of it, Bingley proposed to go for a walk, as he was going to be with him. Jane was left alone.Everyone agrees.Mrs. Bennet was not in the habit of walking, and Mary never wanted to waste time, so there were only five people who went out together.Bingley and Jane at once let the others go first, and they themselves followed, leaving Elizabeth, Kitty, and Darcy to attend to the reciprocation.All three were silent: Kitty was too afraid of Darcy to speak; Elizabeth was secretly making her best resolutions; Darcy was probably the same.

They went to Lucas's house, for Kitty wanted to see Maria; and Elizabeth, feeling that it was unnecessary for all to go, ventured to follow him on after Kitty had left them.Now was the time for her to make up her mind; and at once she summoned up courage to say to him; I am a selfish man, Mr. Darcy, and I only want to please myself, whether it hurts yours or not.You are too dear to my poor sister, and I cannot fail to be grateful to you.Ever since I learned of this, I have wanted to thank you; and if all my family knew, I would not be the only one who should be grateful to you. I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, Mr. Darcy was surprised and moved.If you look at it in the wrong light, it may make you feel bad, but you don't expect to know it.I did not expect Mrs. Gardiner to be so unreliable.

You shouldn't blame my aunt.It was only because Lydia, herself inattentive, let her tongue out, that I knew you were involved in this matter; and of course I wouldn't rest until I found out.Let me thank you on behalf of my whole family, thank you for going to them with compassion, not afraid of trouble, and suffering all kinds of grievances. Darcy said: If you really want to thank me, you only have to show your own gratitude.It is useless to deny that the reason I have worked so hard is, among other reasons, to please you.Your family doesn't need to thank me.Although I respected them, I could only think of you at the time.

Elizabeth was too embarrassed to say a word.After a while, her friend said again: You are a cheerful person, and you will never make fun of me.Please tell me honestly if you are still in the same mood as in April.My wishes and feelings remain the same, and if you say a word, I will never speak of the matter again. Elizabeth felt more uneasy and anxious for him when he heard him express his heart in this way, so she had to speak.She at once hesitated to tell him that her heart had changed so much since the period he had just mentioned, and that she was now willing to accept his kindness with pleasure and gratitude.This answer made him feel the joy he had never felt before. Like a man in love, he immediately seized this opportunity and poured out his heart to her with infinite obedience and enthusiasm.Had Elizabeth only looked up and looked into his eyes, she would have seen how handsome his beaming face made him; and though she dared not look at his face, she dared listen to his voice; He only heard him tell her all his emotions, how important she was to him, and the more she listened, the more she felt the preciousness of his emotions.

They just walked forward without even discerning the direction.They have so much to think about, so many emotions to feel, and so many words to talk about.She really didn't have the heart to pay attention to other things, and she realized immediately that the reason for the mutual understanding this time was due to the strength of his aunt. It turned out that when his aunt went back, she passed by London to find him once. She told him the story of her own coming to Longbourn, her motives, and the content of her conversation with Elizabeth, especially she described in detail every word and every word of Elizabeth. I talked about it emphatically, thinking that in this way, even if Elizabeth refused to agree to cancel the marriage, her aunt would definitely agree to it.However, it was the old lady who was to blame, and the effect was just the opposite.

He said: I hardly dared to hope before, but this time I feel hopeful.I know your temper perfectly, and I think that if you really hated me to the bone, and could never get it back, you would confess it to Lady Catelyn. Elizabeth blushed, smiled, and said, "That's true, you know I'm straightforward, and that's why you believe me to do that."Since I can scold you with hatred in front of your own face, I will naturally scold you in front of any of your relatives. If you scold me, which one doesn't deserve it?Although your accusations are groundless, and you have heard other people spread rumors, but my attitude towards you that time really deserves the most severe reprimand.That is inexcusable.When I think about it, I can't help hating myself.

Elizabeth said: "Who should be more responsible for what happened that afternoon? We don't need to argue. Strictly speaking, the attitudes of both sides are not good, but since that time, I think both of us are more polite." . I'm really sorry.For several months, when I think of the words I said at that time, the behavior, attitude, and expression I showed, I feel unspeakably sad.What you scolded me was really good, and I will never forget it for the rest of my life.You say: It would be nice if you were more polite.You don't know how much pain your words have caused me, you can't imagine; but, to tell the truth, it took me a long time to understand and admit that you were right in what you said.

I could never have imagined that those words would have such an effect on you.I didn't expect that sentence to hurt you at all. It's easy for me to believe what you say.You thought I had no real feeling at all, and I'm sure you did.I will never forget that you turned your back on me at that time, you said, no matter how I propose to you, I can't move your heart and make you agree to me. Ouch, you don't need to mention my words again, it would be outrageous to mention them.I tell you, I've been ashamed of that myself for a long time. Darcy referred to the letter again.He said: After you received my letter, did you immediately have a better impression of me?Do you believe what the letter said?

She said that the letter had a great influence on her, and since then, her prejudice against him has gradually disappeared. He said: I thought at the time that you must be very uncomfortable after reading that letter, but I really had to.I wish you had destroyed that letter.Some of it, especially the opening ones, I really don't want you to read it again.I remember some words that must have made you hate me to death. If you think that you must burn that letter in order to keep my love, then of course I must burn it; but then again, even if I change my mind easily, I will not turn against you after reading that letter.

Darcy said: When I wrote that letter, I thought I was completely calm and level-headed; but I realized afterwards that it was indeed out of general resentment. The letter may have begun with a bit of resentment, but it didn't end like that.The last sentence is completely merciful.Don't think about that letter any more.Whether it is the letter writer or the recipient, the mood is very different from the original one. Therefore, all unpleasant things should be forgotten.You have to learn my outlook on life.If you want to recall the past, you should only recall those things that make you happy.

I don't think you have that outlook on life.For you, there is nothing in the past that should be blamed. Therefore, when you recall the past, you feel satisfied with everything. This is not so much because of your outlook on life, but because you You are innocent.But my situation is different.I can't help thinking of some painful things in my mind. I really can't think about it, and I shouldn't think about it.Although I do not advocate selfishness, in fact I have been selfish all my life.Since I was a child, adults have taught me that this is how I should behave in the world, but they did not teach me to change my temper.They taught me this rule and that rule, and taught me their arrogance.Unfortunately, I am an only child (for several years, I was the only child in the family), and I was spoiled by my parents since I was a child.Although my parents themselves are kind people (especially my father, who is completely charitable and amiable), they condoned my selfishness and arrogance, and even encouraged me to be so, and taught me to be so.They taught me not to look down on anyone except my own family members, taught me to look down on the world, at least hoped that I would despise other people's knowledge, despise other people's strengths, and regard the world's people as inferior to me.From the age of eight to the age of twenty-eight, I have been brought up like this. Good Elizabeth, dear Elizabeth, if it is not for you, I may still be like this!I didn't lose you at all!You taught me a lesson. Of course I couldn't bear it at first, but I really benefited from it.You humiliated me for good reason.When I proposed to you, I thought you would definitely agree.Thanks to you for making me see that it is absolutely impossible for me to be vain about a lady who I think is worthy of my favor. Did you really think you would win my favor? I do think so.You must laugh at me for being too conceited, right?I thought you were counting on me, waiting for me to propose. It must be because of my bad attitude, but let me tell you, I didn't mean to be that way.I never meant to deceive you, but I have often made great mistakes in a whim, and you must have hated me very much from that afternoon onwards. hate you!I may be mad at you at first, but after a while I know exactly who to be mad at. I dare not ask you what you thought of me when we met at Pemberley.Do you blame me for not coming? No, where; I'm just surprised. You are certainly amazed, but I am probably even more amazed than you by being so flattered by you.My conscience told me that I did not deserve your hospitality, which, to be honest, I did not expect at the time. Darcy said: My intention at the time was to be as polite and considerate as possible so that you could see that I was quite generous and ignored old grievances. I hope you know that I have taken your reproach seriously and sincerely corrected my mistakes so that I can forgive me and dilute your grievances. ill feeling towards me.As for when I started to have other thoughts, it is really hard to say, probably within half an hour after seeing you. Then he said that Georgiana had been very happy to be her friend that time, and that the sudden interruption of the friendship was very disappointing to her; He had already made up his mind to follow her from Derbyshire to find her sister. As for his depression and melancholy at that time, it was not because he was worried about other things, but because he was thinking about this matter. She thanked him again, but the mention of the matter was so distressing to both parties that they did not discuss it any further. They walked for several miles in this leisurely manner, not paying attention to such things, and finally looked at their watches and realized that it was time to go home. Where were Bingley and Jane? From this sentence, the two of them talked about the other couple.Darcy was glad to know that his friend was engaged to Jane. Elizabeth said: I have to ask you, did you find it unexpected? Not surprised at all.When I left, I felt that things were going to be a success. So you've already given him permission.It really made me guess. Although he tried to argue that she was wrong in saying this, she thought it was true. He said: I confessed this matter to him the night before I went to London, and I should have confessed it long ago.I told him all about the past, and made him understand the absurdity and rashness of my blocking him.He was taken aback.It never occurred to him that such a thing would happen.I also told him that I thought I was mistaken when I thought your sister was plain to him; and I saw at once that he was still deeply attached to Jane, and I was quite sure of their happy union. Elizabeth could not help smiling at the ease with which he could command his friend. She asked: You told him that my sister loves him, did you experience it yourself, or did you hear me say it in spring? I experienced it myself.I have been to your house twice lately, and observed her carefully, and I can see that she is deeply attached to him. I think, once you explain it, he will understand immediately. indeed so.Bingley was extremely sincere and humble.Because of his timidity, he could not make up his mind when faced with such urgent problems, and always believed my words, so everything went smoothly this time.I had to make a confession to him, and I figured he'd be angry about it for a short time.I told him honestly, last winter your sister went to the city to stay for three months. I knew about it at the time, but I deliberately kept it from him.He was really angry.But I believe that as long as he understands that your sister has feelings for him, his anger will naturally disappear.He has now forgiven me with sincerity and sincerity. Elizabeth thought it was a rare thing that Bingley was so easy to believe; she could not help saying that Bingley was a very lovely man, but she did not say it.She remembered that it was not yet convenient to joke with Darcy, and it would be too early to tease him.He went on talking with her, predicting Bingley's happiness, which was certainly not equal to his own.The two kept talking about walking into the house and the hall before they separated.