Chapter 32 32 Stories of Dumb Bachelors

Prohor.Petrovitch scratched the back of his head, sniffed at the snuff, and went on: They poured me two bottles of white wine.As I sat there, drinking, I felt people walking up and down all around me, congratulating me with sly smiles.The owner's daughter was sitting next to me, and I, a drunken fool, thought I was talking nonsense.I babble about home life, I babble about irons and pots and pots and I give her a big kiss every time I finish a sentence Pooh!It's disgusting to even think about it now.I woke up the next morning with a pain in my head that was about to explode, and a taste of pigsty in my mouth, but I felt and realized that I was no longer a scum, no longer a little person, but a real fiancé, and I Ring on finger!I went up to my father who was still alive at the time, and told so and so, and said: Dear Papa, I have promised them that I intend to marry.My father, of course, laughed at his disbelief.

Why do you marry, little doll?He said, you must know that you are not even twenty years old! I was really young then.Younger than winter's first snow. I have curly golden hair and a burning heart in my chest, and my belly isn't as ball-like as it is now, and my waist is as thin as a woman's. If you live a few more years, it will not be too late to get married by then.said father. I insisted on not taking it. Of course, I wanted to do it myself. I was spoiled by my parents.I made up my mind. So who do you want to marry?asked the father. With Maria.Kretkina Father was startled.

You are crazy to marry that slippery man!Know that her father is a liar and in debt they are fooling you!They're going to get you hooked!You fool! Indeed, I was a fool.I was so confused that when I knocked on the head I could hear it in the next room.Loud! [Note: It means that his head is empty, so he is stupid. ] I never said a single wise word until I was thirty.But being a fool, you know, is always bad luck.That's how I am. I often have bad luck: one moment I meet one, and the other moment I deserve it. Who told you to be a fool? Kicked out of school I've been kicked out of high school seven times and now I'm getting married again Yeah my father just scolded me and yelled at me and almost hit me, but I just made up my mind.

I want to get married, I am determined!What does this have to do with others?Now that I have my thinking ability, no father can stop me!I am no longer young! My mother was still alive at the time and came running.She didn't believe her ears, and suddenly passed out. I insisted on my claim.I thought to myself: Since I plan to start a family, can I not get married?You know, I think Mariah is a beauty and she's not a beauty, but I still think she's a beauty and I wish I could feel that way because that stupid idea is stuck in my head and she's kind of stooped , her eyes are a little slanted, and her body is thin. Besides, she is a stupid girl. In a word, she is a living treasure.The Kretkins saw that it would be profitable to marry me.They are paupers, but I have a family business.My father has a large family property.My father went to my superior and said: Old man, my lord!Don't allow that poisonous snake in my house to marry you!Please send God's mercy!This kid is going to die!

It's my misfortune to say that my boss has a bit of a new school of thought.At that time, liberalism was just beginning to prevail, and that new school of thinking was in vogue I cannot interfere in the private life of my subordinates, he said, and I advise you not to violate your son's freedom either. But then again, he's a fool, my lord! My boss raised his fist and pounded on the table! Whoever he is, sir, he has a right to have himself as he pleases!He's a free man, sir!When will you savages learn to understand life? !Go and send your son to me! Father came to call me.I buttoned all the buttons on my clothes and went.

What are your orders? Listen to me, young man!Your parents prevent you from doing what you want.On their part, it was cruel and despicable.Believe me, young man, the sympathy of a decent man is always on your side.If you are in love, you will go wherever your heart leads you.If your parents hold you back out of ignorance, tell me.I have my own way to deal with them, I want to show them some color! In order to show that he has the purest new ideas, he adds: I'm going to your wedding.I can even be the officiant in your father's place.Tomorrow I will go and see your fiancée. I bowed, and happily walked out of the room.My father was still standing there, on the verge of crying, when I made an insulting gesture at him behind my back.

He went to see my fiancée the next day.He quite liked her. She was thin, he said, but she had a lovely face.She had a kind look on her face, he said, and she was very elegant.How happy you are, young man! Three days later, he went to see my fiancée with a gift. You accept the old man's gift, he said, I wish you happiness. He even shed tears on the fifth day we had our engagement.He drank rum and two glasses of champagne at the engagement.How kind! Your woman is not bad!She was thin, he said, and looked sideways, but there was something French about her!Like a fire! Three days before the wedding, I went to my fiancée's house.I also brought a bouquet of flowers, you know

Where is Maria? not at home Where has she gone? My future husband-in-law kept his mouth shut and smiled.My mother-in-law sat there too, drinking coffee with sugar (she used to drink tea with sugar cubes). But where is she?Why don't you speak? Which judge are you?Where did you come from, or where are you going back!You might as well back off. I took a closer look, only to see that my father-in-law was full of wine.he's drunk, the bastard Blow!he said, smiling triumphantly.You find another bride.Maria has climbed the high branch!Hee hee hee.She went to her benefactor! who? I just went to find that person to find your big belly, hehehe, you shouldn't have brought him here in the first place!

I yelled oops! Prohor.Petrovich blew his nose loudly, smiled, and added: "I yelled oops, and I've been smarter since then."