Chapter 19 cold in the depths of the universe

The foundation's Friday meeting was late.After the meeting, I drove home and used my key to unlock the apartment door, only to find Molly sitting in front of my computer typing away. The desk is in the southwest corner of the living room, facing the window and facing the door far away.Jasmine half turned around, the expression on her face looked a little frightened.At that moment, she quickly clicked the close icon in the upper right corner to close the program she was using. Molly? I wasn't surprised to see her in my house.She is almost always with me every weekend.She also has a pair of keys.However, she has never been interested in touching my computer.

She said: You didn't even call back. I'm in a meeting with salespeople from several insurance companies.They covered the entire staff of the foundation.Originally, they informed me that there would be a two-hour meeting, but it only lasted 20 minutes, and the self-pay plan was updated.After the meeting, I thought to myself that it might be quicker to just drive all the way home.If Molly stops on the way to buy wine, maybe I can get home before Molly.Jasmine kept looking at me with a cold look. I felt it was necessary to tell Jasmine about the meeting just now, and then ask her why she wanted to see my computer files.

When I walked towards her, she smiled dryly, feeling a little embarrassed and embarrassed, as if saying: It's you who made me so boring.Her right hand hovers over the mouse touch panel of my computer.She turned back to face the screen, and the cursor on the screen slid to the shutdown icon. I said: wait a minute. What's the matter, do you want to use it? The cursor has moved to the shutdown icon.I put my hand on Molly's.No.I just want to see what you're doing. She looked a little nervous, her ears were flushed red, and she could see her blood vessels pulsing.Didn't you tell me you're welcome?Well, do you think I'm a little too casual?I thought you wouldn't be upset.

What are you upset about, Molly? Not happy that I use your computer. What are you doing with this computer? Nothing, just looking around. However, there was no way that that computer was something Jasmine would be interested in.It's been five years and it's almost antique.The computer she uses for work is much more sophisticated than this one.And I noticed that when I entered the door just now, she hastily turned off the program.That's my life chore management program.I use that program all the time to pay my bills, manage my bank checking account, and keep some phone lists.

You seem to be looking at some blank form program.I said. I accidentally pressed it.Your computer is confusing me.It's all like this, everyone arranges their computers differently.Sorry Tyler, I seem to have gone a little too far.She pulled her hand from under my palm and clicked the shutdown icon.The image on the screen suddenly shrunk and disappeared, and the buzzing sound of the host fan also quieted down.Molly stood up and straightened her blouse.Every time Jasmine stood up, she would pull off her clothes neatly.She always keeps things in order.I'll make dinner, okay?She turned and walked towards the kitchen.

I watched her walk into the kitchen, the swinging doors swinging back and forth.I stood there counting for ten seconds, then followed into the kitchen. She was taking the pan off the shelf.She glanced at me, then turned her head away again. I said: Molly, if you want to know something, just ask me. Oh, really?OK. jasmine She put the pot on the mouth of the stove, and her movements seemed a little exaggerated, as if she was afraid that it might break.Do you want me to say sorry again?OK Taylor, I'm sorry I used your computer without first asking. Jasmine, I am not blaming you for anything.

Then why are you talking endlessly?Why do you make me feel like we're going to keep talking about this tonight?Tears had already begun to glisten in her eyes, and the colored contact lenses had been soaked into emerald-like dark green by tears.I'm just a little curious about you. What is there to be curious about?My utility bill? Curious about you.She pulled a chair from the side of the table, its legs caught in the table legs.Molly yanked the chair out violently.She sat down with her legs crossed.That's right.Maybe even some insignificant little places I am curious about.Maybe it's the little places that I'm particularly curious about.She closed her eyes and shook her head.Saying this seems like I'm testing your privacy.But that's right.Your utility bill, what brand of toothpaste you use, what size shoes you wear.Yes, I'm just curious.I just wish I could feel that I mean more to you than just the person you sleep with on Saturdays and Sundays.I admit.

Then you don't need to look at my file. Maybe I won't look at all if What if? She shook her head.Forget it, I don't want to argue with you anymore. If you have something on your mind, just say it. Well, for example, just like that.Every time you feel threatened, you will show that cold and detached attitude, a very calm, unpredictable, as if you are doing some research and analysis.I felt like one of those wilderness adventure documentaries you watch on TV.The glass curtain is down, but the glass is always there, isn't it?The whole world is on the other side of the glass.That's why you don't let other people know about you.That's why I waited a whole year to see if you would notice that I was a woman and not just a decoration in your office.You are always silent, always watching with cold eyes.You're looking at real people, like you're watching some evening news, like there's a war dead somewhere on the other side of the world, and you don't even know the names of those people.

jasmine I mean, Tyler, I know everybody's messed up, everyone who's ever been born in this time circle is messed up.You said that everyone has pre-catastrophic stress disorder, am I wrong?We are a deformed generation.That's why people get divorced, sexually confused, religiously fanatical, depressed, manic, or apathetic.Everyone finds valid excuses for the bad things they do, including me.So if you have to rely on this mental pillar that you've carefully built to get you through every night, that's okay, I get it.So, if I want to seek a little more spiritual comfort, it is not a crime.I didn't do anything wrong, not only was I right, but it's very human for me to want to be close to you.I don't want just passion, I want that intimacy.

When she said this, she felt that she had said enough, so she let go of the hands crossed on her chest and waited to see my reaction. I had a lot to say to her.I wanted to tell her that I was passionate about her.Maybe it's not that obvious, but I've noticed her since I started working at the Foundation.I noticed the soft lines of her body and the vigorous vitality she exuded.I noticed the way she stood, walked, even stretched and yawned.I noticed that she always dressed plainly, and that she always wore a silver necklace with a beautifully made butterfly on it.I noticed that she was sometimes in a bad mood and sometimes impulsive.I noticed the way she smiled, the way she frowned, noticed her beautiful gestures.Whenever I close my eyes, whenever I sleep, her face is in front of my eyes.I love her beauty and the little things about her.For example, there is a salty sweat smell on her neck and a soft rhythm in her voice.I love the way she bends her fingers, and loves how she writes on me with her fingers.

There are many things in my heart, but I just can't say them. These words are not lying to her, but they are not 100% true. In the end we made up.We smiled ambiguously at each other, with tears in the corners of our eyes, hugged each other to comfort each other, and stopped talking about those things.She cooked up a great pot of pasta sauce and I helped out.The original tense atmosphere gradually dissipated.We snuggle up on the couch and watch the news on television, which reports a surge in unemployment, election debates, and a deadly war fighting somewhere on the other side of the world.We watched for an hour, and realized that it was already midnight and it was time to go to bed.Molly went to turn out the lights before we were ready to make out.The room was pitch black, the windows were open, and the sky outside was blank and empty.At the moment when extreme passion and excitement overwhelmed her, she unconsciously bowed her body, panting lazily, exuding a sweet and fragrant breath like milk.I said: Passion, understand?She said: Oh, when you are making out, I understand. She fell asleep at once, but I lay in bed for an hour, but still did not feel sleepy. I rise and fall with her breathing, gently get out of bed.I put on my jeans and walked out of the room.On sleepless nights like these, a glass of mulled wine can be helpful, dispelling the endless clutter of thoughts and lingering doubts in a tired mind.I unconsciously prayed that the doubts in my heart would disappear.However, before entering the kitchen, I first turned on the computer and called out the chore management program. It was impossible to tell what Jasmine was looking at.It seems that the data inside is still fine, and all the names and numbers seem to have not changed.Maybe she found something, enough to make her feel closer to me.If that's really what she wants. Maybe she was looking for a long time in vain, maybe she didn't find anything. ☆ I saw Jason a lot in the weeks leading up to the December election.Although I have increased his dosage, he seems to be getting worse.That may be caused by stress.He was under a lot of pressure to fight against his dad.Edward has publicly revealed his intention to get the Foundation back.He decided that the Foundation had been taken over by a cabal, the same group of arrogant bureaucrats and scientists who were colluding with Vanovan.Jason thinks he's just bluffing, but there's still a possibility that there will be a break between them, and it'll be awkward. Xiaojie took me with him as much as possible, because he needed me to give him some antispasmodics in an emergency.As long as it does not violate the law or the ethics of doctors, I am willing to prescribe medicine to him.The current limit of medicine can only keep Jason's body functioning normally in a short period of time, so that he has enough time to use strategies to defeat Edward.Lawton.Right now, that's the only thing Jay cares about. Therefore, I often stay in the VIP area of ​​the Foundation.Usually with Jason, but often with Van Novin too.Only in this way, I became a suspicious person in the eyes of those guards.Those people include grassroots representatives of various government departments in the foundation, such as: State Department, White House, Department of Homeland Security, Space Command.There are also some scholars who have been dispatched to study the so-called Martian archives and carry out the work of translation and classification.In the eyes of those people, my contact with Wan Nuowen was an act of arrogance, so I became persona non grata.I'm just a small employee, a nobody.But that's why Van Novin would rather be with me.I'm not asking him to do anything, and I'm not here to protect him.At Wanowen's insistence, the gloomy attendants would occasionally lead me in, through several doors, to the air-conditioned room of the Mars ambassador.Beyond those doors was hot Florida, and the whole world beyond. Once, I saw Wan Nuowen sitting on that wicker chair with a low stool under his feet.It must have been brought to him by someone, lest he sit on the chair with his feet dangling in the air.He gazed thoughtfully at a test-tube-shaped glass bottle and its contents.I asked him what it was. He said: Replicas. The suit and tie he was wearing looked like it had been custom-made for a pudgy twelve-year-old boy.For weeks, he's been making presentations for congressional delegations.Although the government has not publicly announced the existence of Van Novin, there has been an endless stream of government-approved visitors, including foreigners and locals.After the election, the White House will officially issue a public statement.By then, Wan Nuowen will be very busy. I was across the room, from a safe distance, looking at the glass tube replica, the ice-eating creature, the seed of the inorganic being. Wan Nuowen smiled and said: Are you afraid?Don't worry, there is nothing to be afraid of.I guarantee that the contents inside are absolutely harmless to you.Didn't Jason tell you? Jason did tell me a little bit.I said: That is a microscopic detection device.semi-organic.They are able to reproduce in the freezing vacuum. Yep, not bad, basically right.Did Jason tell you what these things are for? We'll send them out into the galaxy to breed, and then send the information back. Wan Nuowen nodded slowly, as if my answer was basically right, but not good enough.Taylor, this is the most sophisticated and advanced technological product of the five republics.The amazing achievements of industrial technology on your planet are beyond our reach and affordability.Examples: large ships at sea, moon landings, huge cities Your city is just as breathtaking in my opinion. That's just because our Mars has a relatively low gravity.On Earth, those buildings would have collapsed under their own weight.That doesn't matter, though, I'm talking about what's inside the glass tube.Compared with your industrial technology, this is a major achievement of our technological engineering.It was the result of painstaking research, a product of precision.Maybe we should be proud of it. I totally agree. Thank you.Come, take a closer look.do not be afraid.He gestured for me to come closer.So I went over to him across the room and sat on the chair opposite him.From a distance, we may look like two good friends discussing things.However, my eyes have been fixed on the glass tube.He picked up the tube and gave it to me.He said: Take it and have a look. I held the tube between my thumb and forefinger and held it up to the ceiling light.The contents look like normal water.Except for a little more oily luster, there is no difference from water. "If you want to know what's good about this thing, you have to first understand what you're holding," Wanowen said.Tyler, there are 300, 400,000 artificial cells suspended in glycerol in the tube.Each cell is an acorn. Do you also know what an acorn is? I have read your books.That's a very common metaphor.Acorns and oak trees, right?If you're holding an acorn in your hand, it probably means you're holding an oak tree.Not even just one oak tree, but countless descendants of that oak tree.After thousands of years of reproduction, those oaks are enough to build a whole city. Sorry, is your city built with oak? no.But that's not important. What you're holding in your hand right now is like an acorn.I just said that they are currently in a state of complete dormancy.In fact, in the temperature of the surrounding earth, those special samples in your hand may have been completely dead.If you analyze them, you may find that the main ingredients are just some ordinary traceable chemicals. But? But Taylor, if you put it in a cold environment with ice and no air, like the Oort cloud, it will come alive.It will begin to reproduce very slowly and patiently. Oort cloud.Jason talked to me about the Oort cloud a long time ago, and I've seen it in science fiction myself.I still read science fiction once in a while.The Oort cloud is a huge spherical cloud composed of comets. It surrounds the solar system. It starts from the orbit of Pluto and expands outward. one-third of the distance.Those small comet bodies are distributed very scatteredly, but the space they occupy is unimaginably large, and the total mass is twenty or thirty times that of the earth.The main components of the Oort cloud are dust and ice. If the replicas eat dust and ice, it's really worth eating. Wan Nuowen leaned forward in a chair.His eyelids were wrinkled like leather, but his eyes shone brightly.He smiled at me.I gradually learned that when he smiles, it means that his heart is very sincere.When a Martian smiles, what he says comes from the heart. In order to develop replicas back then, our Mars was not completely without controversy.What you hold in your hand can permanently change not only the solar system, but many other galaxies as well.Of course, the results are unpredictable.Although the replicas are not traditional organic organisms, they are living.They are living autocatalytic feedback loop system organisms, which are easily deformed and transformed under the pressure of the environment.like humans, or fungi, or Or Mokuz.I said. He grinned.Or Mokuz. In other words, they evolve. They do evolve and are completely unpredictable.However, we put a lot of constraints into the development process.At least we feel like we did.Like I just said, we had a lot of controversy back then. Whenever I hear Van Novin talk about politics on Mars, some interesting images pop up in my mind.I imagine wrinkled men and women in ancient Roman toga standing at stainless steel lecterns debating abstract issues.Vanovan always thought that a council on Mars was like a rural grain auction, where a bunch of cash-strapped farmers quarreled.When it comes to what they're wearing uh, I can't even imagine.On formal occasions, men and women alike, Martians dress like the Queen of Hearts in poker. However, for all their serious debate over the clone project, the project itself was very simple.The replicas will be scattered to the distant and cold edge of the solar system, and a tiny part of them will reach the Oort cloud and land on two or three cometary nuclei.They will start breeding there. The replicant's genetic information is broken down into molecules, Vanovan said.In any place warmer than Neptune's moons, the temperature of these molecules would be very unstable.The replica is designed for extremely cold environments. Once in such an environment, there is a single fiber in the replica that cannot be seen with a microscope and will start to metabolize.The process of metabolism is slow and laborious.There is a pilonidon pine in the southwestern United States that grows very slowly, but is explosively fast compared to the replicas.No matter how slow it is, the replicator will still grow, and then release tracking volatiles and organic molecules, and pack ice into cell walls, cell ribs, cell columns, and cell nodes. After the replicas eat hundreds of cubic meters of the cometary nucleus, their internal tissue connections will begin to become complex, and they will begin to produce purposeful behaviors.They develop complex organs such as eyes.Those ice-and-carbon eyes would begin to scan the starry, dark universe. After about a decade, those replicas will form a complex community capable of recording data on the original components of the surrounding environment and transmitting this data.As if it would look at the sky and ask itself a question: Is there a black object the size of a planet orbiting the nearest star? This process of asking questions and answering them will take decades, but the answers are there from the start.There are at least two answers.Yes, among the planets orbiting stars, two are black objects: Earth and Mars. No matter how slow and how patient and persistent the process is, the replicas check the data and send it back to where they came from, which is us.At least our probes will pick it up. The end result of a complex machine is disintegration.Next, the population of replicators breaks down into strings of simple cells.Over time, these cells have mined many volatiles on the host cometary nucleus.They will find another bright or nearest star in the universe, and use the accumulated volatiles to push the seeds out of the solar system.After disintegration, the replica will leave a small part in place, which acts as a repeater for signal transmission.This small piece is the passive connection point in an ever-expanding network. These second-generation seeds will drift among the stars for years, decades, or even thousands of years.The final fate of the vast majority is death.Some will be lost in the wrong orbit, and some will be lost in the vortex of gravity.Some will be pulled back by the weak and distant sun's gravitational force, fall back into the Oort cloud of the solar system, and repeat the whole process again, eating ice foolishly and patiently, and recording repeated data.If two batches of seeds meet, they swap cytoplasm.Prolonged time and radiation can cause replication errors in these seeds.These two batches of seeds will integrate these errors equally, and reproduce the next generation that is very similar.The seeds of the next generation are not exactly the same as the original seeds. Some reach the clouds of ice and dust on the outskirts of nearby stars and begin the cycle again.This time, they gather new information and finally blast it out in a brief digital frenzy.These data may record: twin stars, no black star.May also read: White dwarf, a black star. This cycle will repeat again. Repeat again. Repeat endlessly, star by star, step by step, hundreds of years, thousands of years, infinitely slow.However, when we measure the time of the outer universe from the stationary earth, it is extremely fast.Every day on earth is equivalent to hundreds of thousands of years in the outer universe.On Earth's slow time, we'll see them all over the Milky Way in about a decade. Information travels at the speed of light, hopping from connection point to connection point.The replicas will gradually adjust their mode of operation, sending new replicas to unexplored new areas, and will compress redundant information so that the main transmission connection points will not be overloaded with excessive information.In the end, we will connect the entire galaxy into some kind of original thinking body.The replica will build a neural network as vast as the night sky.It will communicate with us. So, are there any risks?Of course there are risks. Van Novin said that the Martians would never have approved this ambitious plan to exploit the resources of the galaxy if it hadn't been for the appearance of time gyrations.We are not just exploring the galaxy, but intervening in the operation of the galaxy, reorganizing the entire galaxy ecology like an autocratic empire.Are there other intelligent beings in the vast galaxy?The existence of hypothetical intelligent beings is the most obvious answer.If there are other intelligent beings in the galaxy, they may mistake our action of spreading replicas as some kind of aggression and retaliate. It wasn't until the Martians discovered that hypothetical intelligent creatures had assembled a time gyroscope over the North and South Poles that they began to rethink the risks of the entire plan. Van Novin said: The emergence of time gyrations has allowed the opposition to be put on hold, or almost put on hold.With any luck, the clones will give us important data on a lot of hypothetical intelligent beings, or at least we'll know how far they have deployed time gyrations across the galaxy.Maybe we'll be able to find out what the purpose of the time gyrations is.Even if that fails, I can still use the replica as a sort of warning sign to other intelligent beings that they may face the same problem.If the people who receive the information are thoughtful enough to analyze the data carefully, they will understand why this network was built.They may choose to join us.This knowledge can help them protect themselves and do things we don't. Do you think we might fail? Van Novin shrugged.Don't you think we've failed?Tyler, you should know.The sun is very old now.Nothing lasts forever.Under such circumstances, even eternity is short-lived for us. Even though he said it lightly, even though he was sitting on the rattan chair and leaning forward, with a sad smile on his face, a sincere smile typical of Martians, you still feel the heaviness in his words.He spoke serenely, yet shockingly. Not that what he said surprised me.We all know that the fate of mankind is doomed, at least doomed to hide in the shell of time whirl until the end of the world.That shell protects us from the sun.The current sunlight can make Mars a habitable planet, but the heat is enough to destroy everything on the earth.Even Mars itself has been pushed out of the so-called habitable zone since Mars was surrounded by time gyres.The dying sun, originally the source of life for all things, has become a bloody executioner, mercilessly destroying us. The center of the solar system is a mass of unstable nuclear fission reactions, and life is born on the periphery of the nuclear reaction zone.This is a living fact, a fact that has not changed through the ages.Long before time gyrations appeared, the world was like this.Even if the sky looks so clear, even if the summer nights are shone with distant, indifferent stars, we cannot ignore the fact.Even so, we don't pay much attention to it, because human life is too short. At the moment when the heart of the solar system beats, human beings have reproduced for countless generations in the alternation of birth and death.But these days, thank goodness, we'll outlive the sun.Maybe in the end we will become a small residue surrounded by the sun's corpse, maybe we will survive, live in eternal darkness, become a sealed little toy, unable to find our true home in the vast universe. Taylor?How are you? For some reason, I suddenly thought of Diane.I said: I'm fine.Perhaps the only thing we can hope for is to know a little bit of the truth before the curtain ends. What does it mean? the end of the world. Van Novin agrees.Although that is not much consolation, it is probably the only thing we can hope for. You Martians have known for a long time, millennia, that you have time to maneuver this thing.For such a long time, can't you figure out the origin of hypothetical intelligent creatures? Unfortunately, we have no way of knowing and can't give you any information.As for the physical properties of time gyrations, we have some speculations.In fact, Jason also wanted to explain it to me recently.That is a kind of time quantum, most of which are pure mathematical concepts, which cannot be applied to engineering technology.Neither Martians nor Earthlings can do it.However, we don't know anything about the origin of hypothetical intelligent creatures.As to what their purpose was he shrugged.We also just have more guesses.We asked ourselves a question: What is wrong with the Earth that they are wrapping the Earth in a time vortex?Why do hypothetical intelligent creatures surround Mars with time gyrations?Why would they single out this particular moment in our history? Do you have an answer? A guard knocked on the door and opened it to come in.The bald guy was wearing a handmade suit.He looked at me as he spoke to Van Novin.I just came to inform that the European representative is coming soon.Five more minutes.He didn't close the door, as if waiting for something.So I stood up. Wan Nuowen said: Let’s talk next time. Hopefully we will meet again soon. I will try to arrange it. It's getting late, it's time to get off work.I go out through the north door.I walked toward the parking lot, halfway there, and stopped to stand beside a row of wooden fences.Inside is the construction site for the Foundation's stamped buildings.Through the gaps in the fence, I could see a drab building of cinderblock, a huge outdoor pressure tank, with pipes as large as barrels running vertically through cement windows that were wide on the inside and narrow on the outside.The floor was littered with Teflon insulation and circles of copper pipe.There, a foreman in a white hard helmet yells at workers pushing wheelbarrows.The workers wore goggles and iron-toed boots. They are building a tank to grow a new life.The culture tank will be filled with liquid helium to grow replicas.These replicas are then launched into the frigid depths of space.In a way, that's our descendant.They will live longer and travel farther than us humans.That was our last conversation with the universe.Unless Edward has a way to cancel the whole project. ☆ That weekend, Molly and I went for a walk on the beach. It was the end of October, and it was a Saturday, blue and cloudless.We walked on the beach littered with cigarette butts for nearly half a kilometer.Before long, the weather became hotter and hotter, and it was unbearably hot.The sun is getting stronger and stronger, and dazzling light spots are shining on the sea, as if groups of diamonds are floating in the distant sea.Molly was wearing shorts, a white cotton T-shirt, and sandals.The wet T-shirt clings to her body, revealing her seductive curves.She pulled the sun hat with the price tag on it low over her eyes. I never get it.she says.She ran her wrist across her forehead and turned to look at the footprints in the sand. Don't understand what, Molly? Sun, I mean sunshine.Everyone said that this sunshine is fake.But, my God, it's so hot.The heat is not fake. In fact, the sun is not completely false.The sun we see is not the real sun, but the sunlight comes from the real sun.This is made by hypothetical intelligent creatures.They shorten the wavelength very short, then filter I know this.What I don't understand is, if the time gyration barrier is only a few hundred kilometers high, why does the sun look so real?sunrise and sunset.If the sun is just a projection, why does it look the same whether we are from Canada or South America? I told her Jason's previous explanation.The fake sun is not an image projected on a screen.The sun, 150 million kilometers away, was shining on the barrier, and they used that sunlight to create an image.It's like the lighting program that follows people on the stage, but on a scary scale. They really don't bother to do this kind of stage trick.Molly said. If they didn't, we'd be dead long ago.The ecology on our earth must be 24 hours a day.Many species have become extinct in the past few years.Those species must have moonlight to be able to forage or mate. But that is deceiving. You can say that if you want. deceitful.I said that was a lie.I stand here basking in the sun, but the sun on my face is fake.This deceitful sunlight still causes skin cancer.But I still can't figure it out.I don't think we'll ever know until we figure out what hypothetical intelligent beings are about.Do we have a chance to figure it out?I really doubt it. We walked side by side on a very old boardwalk, the planks had been whitened by salt.Molly said, you'll never understand a lie unless you first understand why they lie.She squinted at me as she spoke, the shadow of her hat covering her eyes.What seemed to be revealed in her eyes, I couldn't figure it out for a while. After walking, we returned to our air-conditioned apartment.We spent the rest of the afternoon reading books and listening to music.Jasmine seemed restless, and I was still a little worried about her peeking at the computer last time.I love Molly.At least that's what I tell myself.Or, if my feelings for her weren't love, at least they felt close.A near-real alternative. What disturbs me is that she strikes me as very elusive all the time.In fact, everyone is elusive under the shadow of the whirling time.I don't know what gift to give her.There are some things she wants, but unless I have the opportunity to pass by the shop window and hear her say something she likes, otherwise, I don't know what she wants at all.She hides her innermost desires.Perhaps, like most deep-seated people, she thought I was hiding some big secret myself. After dinner, we were about to clear the table when the phone rang.I was drying my hands when Molly was already on the phone.I heard her say: Oh no, he's here, please wait a minute.Covering the microphone with her hand, she said: It's Jason, do you want to talk to him?His voice sounded a bit abnormal. Of course I'm going to take it. I picked up the microphone and waited.Jasmine looked at me for a long time, gave me a blank look, and then walked out of the kitchen.Can speak now.Xiaojie, what's the matter? Tyler, come here quickly!His voice sounded tense and his speech was labored.Come here now! What happened? Things are getting bigger.I need your help. Is it that urgent? No hurry, will I call? Where are you? home. Okay, but it might be a little later in case of traffic jams along the way You are right to come. So I told Molly that I had something urgent to attend to.She smiled, kind of like a sneer.She said: What kind of urgent matter?A patient who didn't see an appointment?Or should I rush to deliver the baby?What's up? Molly, I'm a doctor, and this is what I'm supposed to do. It's true that you're a doctor, but that doesn't mean you're Jason.Lawton's dog.Every time he throws the stick, you don't have to catch it every time. 對不起，今天晚上沒辦法繼續陪妳了。妳要我載妳到什麼地方去嗎，還是 她說：不必。我會在這裡等你回來。她用一種蔑視的眼神瞪著我，彷彿在挑釁，彷彿想逼我說出不可以。 但我不能說不可以，因為那聽起來會像是我不信任她。我應該算是很信任她的。可是我實在沒把握會去多久。 It doesn't matter.如果你不反對的話，我會窩在沙發上看電視，可以嗎？ 只要你不覺得無聊的話。 我保證我一定不會覺得無聊。 ☆ 傑森那間簡陋的公寓必須沿著公路往北開三十公里才會到。半路上經過一個犯罪現場，警察封閉了道路，我只好繞路走。有人想在半路上攔截銀行的運鈔車，但沒有成功，而一整車的加拿大觀光客卻意外喪生了。小傑按了一下對講機上的按鍵，開了公寓大樓的大門讓我進來。進去之後，我敲他家的門，聽到他在裡面喊：門沒鎖。 客廳還是老樣子，彷彿一大片拼花地板的大沙漠。小傑住在裡面，簡直就像是阿拉伯的貝都因人在沙漠裡搭帳篷。他躺在沙發上，沙發旁邊的落地燈正好照在他身上，很亮。他臉色蒼白，額頭上全是汗珠，眼睛裡似乎閃著淚光。 他說：我還以為你不會來了，也許你那個土包子女朋友不讓你出來。 我告訴他路上發生的事，繞了一點遠路。然後我說：幫個忙，不要這樣說茉莉。 是呀，不可以說她是愛達荷州來的鄉下土包子，小時候住在活動房屋的停車場，有一顆脆弱敏感的心靈。怎麼樣，還有什麼不可以說的嗎？ What's the matter with you? 這個問題有意思，可能的答案有很多個。look by youself. He stood up. 他的動作看起來軟弱無力，彷彿體內裝了齒輪，一格一格慢慢移動。傑森的模樣還是一樣瘦瘦高高的，可是昔日隨心所欲的矯捷身手似乎已經消失了。他手臂下垂，鬆軟無力地擺盪著。當他想辦法要站直的時候，腿卻繃得緊緊的很不自然，彷彿他的上半身架在高蹺上一樣。他眨眼睛的樣子簡直像是在抽搐。他說：就是這麼回事。然後，身體又是一陣痙攣，情緒彷彿也跟著肉體一起抽搐，爆發出狂亂的憤怒。look at me!他他媽的泰勒，你看看我！ 小傑，你坐下，我幫你檢查一下。我帶了一些診療工具。我把他的袖子捲起來，把血壓計的捲套包在他骨瘦嶙峋的手臂上。我感覺得到他的肌肉在不由自主地收縮著。 他血壓很高，脈搏很快。你吃過抗痙攣藥嗎？ nonsense!我他媽的當然吃過。 有按規定吃嗎？有沒有吃雙倍的藥量？小傑，如果你吃太多，不但沒效反而有害。 傑森嘆了口氣，顯得很不耐煩。接著，他的動作嚇了我一跳。他突然伸手抓住我後面的頭髮，把我抓得很痛。他抓著我的頭髮，把我整個人往下扯，把我的臉拉到他面前。他說話的時候咬牙切齒，聲音像暴怒的河流。 泰勒，少跟我打官腔。別幹這種事，因為我現在沒時間聽你打官腔。也許你有很多大道理要告訴我該怎麼治療，不過很抱歉，我現在沒時間聽你那些狗屁道理。現在很多事情已經到了緊要關頭。艾德華明天早上就會飛到基金會來。艾德華認為他手上有一張王牌可以打，可以讓我們一槍斃命，免得我去搶了他的王位。我不能讓他得逞。可是你看看我，你覺得我現在有那種能耐去演一齣弒父篡位的戲碼嗎？他緊緊抓著我的頭髮，越抓越緊，抓得我很痛。他力氣還是很大。後來，他終於放手了，用另一隻手把我推開。所以，把我醫好！不然要你這個醫生幹什麼，不是嗎？ 我拉了一張椅子過來，靜靜地坐在那邊不說話。後來，他終於又躺回沙發上。剛剛突如其來的舉動把他搞得筋疲力盡。他看著我從醫藥包裡拿出一支針筒，從一個土黃色的小瓶子裡抽了一些藥水出來。 what is that? 這個可以暫時解除你的痛苦。其實那只是一瓶無害的維他命Ｂ群，混了一點微量的鎮靜劑。傑森一臉狐疑地看著針筒，卻還是乖乖讓我幫他打了針。針頭抽出來的時候，滲出了一點血。 我說：其實你也知道我要說什麼。這個病沒辦法治好。 地球的藥治不好。 What's the meaning? 你應該明白什麼意思。 他講的是萬諾文的生命延長處理法。 萬諾文說，身體再造的同時，也可以治好一大串遺傳基因缺陷所導致的疾病。藥物會重新排列傑森體內導致非典型多發性硬化的ＤＮＡ序列，制止不良蛋白質侵蝕他的神經系統。我說：可是，那會花上好幾個星期，而且，那種處理程序還沒有經過測試，我不能讓你變成實驗室裡的白老鼠。光是有那個念頭，我都沒辦法原諒自己。 你不能說那還沒有經過測試。那些藥火星人已經用了好幾百年，而火星人跟我們人類沒什麼兩樣。而且，泰勒，很抱歉，你那種醫生專業上的顧慮我實在沒興趣，我根本不會列入考慮。 我是醫生，我不得不考慮。 那麼，問題來了。你要考慮到什麼程度？如果你不想參加，就站到一邊去吧。 那種風險 就算有什麼風險也是我的事，跟你無關。He closes his eyes.你不要誤會，我吃那些藥可不是為了虛榮愛面子。我在乎的是能不能活下去，我在乎的是自己能不能好好地站著，講話會不會他他媽的口齒不清。我的意思是，這攸關整個世界的命運。我現在扮演的是一個獨特的角色。這不是偶然的，也不是因為我很聰明或是很偉大。這是我的職責。泰勒，我的角色就像一台機器，一個產品。Edward.羅頓製造了這件產品，就像當年他和你爸爸製造了浮空器一樣。他把我生產出來，是為了讓我發揮功能，管理基金會，帶領人類處理時間迴旋的問題。 總統不見得會批准複製體的計畫，更別提國會或是聯合國了。 幫個忙好不好，我有那麼天真嗎？That's the point.基金會必須利用那些圖謀私利的人才有辦法運作，而且必須八面玲瓏面面俱到。艾德華很懂這一套，他很老奸巨猾。他籠絡政界高層，收編人脈，把基金會搞成了航太工業的搖錢樹。他誘拐詐騙，唱作俱佳，遊說國會，用政治獻金贊助友好政黨競選。他有眼光，有人脈，逮到時機搶占盡優勢。他適時推出浮空器計畫，從時間迴旋手中解救了電信產業，藉此躋身權貴階層。而且，他很懂得如何把這個機會發揚光大。沒有艾德華，火星上就不會有人類。沒有艾德華，就不會有萬諾文這個人。這一切都必須歸功於這隻老狐狸。他是一個偉人。 But? 可是他已經過期了。他那種人屬於時間迴旋之前的年代。他的動機是老式的。他已經交棒了，或者說，因為我的關係，他快要交棒了。 小傑，我不太懂。 艾德華以為他還能夠從這整個計畫中榨取他的個人利益。他痛恨萬諾文，痛恨在銀河裡散播複製體種子的構想。他痛恨，並不是因為這個計畫野心太大，而是因為計畫對他的事業不利。火星計畫為航太工業創造了好幾兆美金的生意，也為艾德華帶來做夢都想不到的財富和權力，為他帶來了家喻戶曉的名聲。艾德華認為這一切都是玩弄政治權謀所創造出來的。他認為現在還是跟時間迴旋之前的時代一樣，可以玩弄政治權謀，像一場豪賭。可惜萬諾文的計畫並沒有那種甜頭。和改造火星比起來，發射複製體所需要的經費簡直是微不足道。我們只要幾枚三角洲7型火箭，還有幾具便宜的離子引擎，就可以輕鬆完成任務。我們需要的，只不過是一把彈弓，幾個試管。 那對艾德華的事業有什麼不利？ 這個計畫沒辦法挽救沒落的產業，而且掏空了他的利基。更糟糕的是，他被趕出了舞台中央。突然間，眾人目光焦點都集中在萬諾紋身上。再過幾個禮拜，我們就會看到一場規模史無前例的媒體狂潮。而且，萬諾文挑選我當這個計畫的主持人。這是艾德華最不願意看到的事。他不願意看到他那個忘恩負義的兒子和那個皺巴巴的火星人勾結，連手瓦解他一輩子的心血。發射這批火箭所需要的經費，還不夠用來造一架民航機。 那他想做什麼？ 他設計了一個規模更大的計畫。他說這個計畫叫做全套監視系統，可以用來尋找假想智慧生物活動的第一手證據。他打算在各大行星安置探測器，從水星一直到冥王星，並且在行星之間部署精密的監聽站。此外，他還打算進行定點飛行任務，偵察地球和火星極地上空的時間迴旋裝置。 他的構想不好嗎？ 也許能夠收集到一點瑣碎的情報，增加一點點數據。最重要的，是為航太工業賺進大把鈔票。這才是計畫真正的目的。可惜艾德華並不了解，他們那一代的人都沒辦法真正了解 了解什麼，小傑？ 窗口已經快要關閉了。人類的窗口。我們地球上的時間。地球在整個宇宙裡生存的時間。時間已經快沒了。我想，我們只剩下最後一次真正的機會去尋找意義，去了解人類創造文明究竟有什麼意義。他的眼皮又慢慢地眨了一下，兩下。他全身緊繃的力道已經快消耗光了。為什麼挑中我們人類？為什麼人類滅亡的方式這麼怪異？這究竟有什麼意義？還有，究竟是什麼意義究竟是什麼意義他抬頭看了我一眼。他媽的你到底給我打了什麼藥，泰勒？ 沒什麼，一點抗焦慮藥。 這就是你所謂的快速治療？ 這不就是你要的嗎？ I guess so.我希望明天早上可以恢復正常。這就是我要的。 吃藥是治不好的。你要求我做的事，就像要我接上更高壓的電流，讓一條接觸不良的電線通電。短時間內也許有效，但那是靠不住的，而且機器零件會承受不了負荷。我非常希望能夠讓你明天完全不會發作。可是，我也很不希望你死在我手上。 如果你不想辦法讓我明天完全不會發作，那跟殺了我也沒什麼兩樣。 我說：我能夠給你的就是我的專業判斷。 你的專業判斷救得了我嗎？ 我想我可以幫得上你。Just a little bit.這一次，小傑，就這一次。不過，已經沒有太多轉寰空間了。你必須面對現實。 我們兩個人都沒有太多轉寰空間了。我們兩個人都必須面對現實。 看到我打開醫藥箱，他鬆了一口氣，笑了一下。 ☆ 我回到家的時候，茉莉窩在沙發上，電視開著。她正在看一部最近很流行的小精靈電影，也可能是天使。電視螢幕上閃爍著模糊的藍光。我一進門，她就把電視關掉了。我問她，我不在的時候有沒有什麼事情。 nothing.有人打電話給你。 oh, who's calling? 傑森的妹妹。What's her name?對了，黛安。住在亞利桑納州那個。 她說了要做什麼嗎？ 只是想聊聊。所以我就跟她聊了一下。 哦，妳們聊些什麼？ 茉莉把頭轉過去。在微弱的燈光下，我只看到她臉部的側影。她說：我們在聊你。 我有什麼好聊的嗎？ 有啊，我叫她以後不要再打電話來，因為你已經有新的女朋友了。我告訴她，從今以後電話都是我來接。 I stare at her. 茉莉露出牙齒，彷彿想裝出笑臉。好了，泰勒，開玩笑你都當真。我只是跟她說你出去了。It's okay, right? 你跟她說我出去了？ 是啊，我跟她說你出去了，不過我沒說你去哪裡，因為實際上你也沒有告訴我。 她提到了什麼緊急的事嗎？ 聽起來好像沒什麼急事。你可以打過去問她呀。沒關係，你打啊我不介意。 她又在試探我。我說：沒關係，以後再打。 她臉色泛紅。她說：那最好，因為我還有事情要你做。