Chapter 13 Chapter Thirteen

The gray gray light of the morning streams in through the shutters and blue curtains.Jeff opened his eyes to see a sleek, seal-spotted Siamese cat sleeping peacefully at the foot of the bed.As he turned around on the king-size bed, the cat looked up, yawned and glanced, annoyed and obviously questioning. Jeff sat up from the bed and turned on the bedside lamp, and carefully inspected the room: the stereo and TV were placed against the far wall, and there were several cabinets of model airplanes and rockets on both sides. The wall on the right was occupied by bookcases, and on his left There are separate wardrobes under the window.Everything is clean, organized and well maintained.

Oh shit, he thought.He's in Orlando at his parents' house, in his teenage room.Something must have gone wrong, horribly wrong.Why not wake up in Emery's dorm room?God, what if he was back to the age of a child this time?He threw the quilt aside, looked at his lower body, and saw that his hair had already grown, and he even had a morning erection.He rubbed his cheeks again, feeling the stinging stubble.At least he's hit puberty. He jumped out of bed and rushed into the bathroom next door.The cat followed him, as long as someone got up at this time, it could have an early breakfast.Jeff flicked on the light and stared at himself in the mirror: it seemed to match what he had always looked like when he was eighteen.But what exactly is he doing at home?

He put on faded jeans and a T-shirt, slipped his sockless feet into a pair of old slippers, and the clock next to the bed said it was about fifteen minutes to seven.Mother may be up, she always likes to start the day with a quiet cup of coffee. He rubbed the cat's neck.Of course he remembers the cat Sasha who got lost from home in his junior year.He should tell his family not to let him go out.Jeff walked down the corridor, past the terrazzo-floored room lighted by the large French windows, and into the kitchen, followed by the majestic animal.Mother was in the kitchen, reading the Orlando Watch and sipping coffee.

For God's sake, she raised her eyebrows while speaking, what would a night owl do to find an early bird? I can't sleep, Mom.There is a lot to do today.He wanted to ask what year, month and day it is now, but he dared not ask. What's important enough to dig you up at first light?I've tried for years and never had success.It must be about girls, right? Yes.Could you give me some newspapers?please.The front page, if you read it? You can take it all, dear.I'm about to start making breakfast anyway.Want some French toast?Or fried eggs, sausage? He almost said no, but immediately felt that his stomach was going to be flat.Well, omelette and sausage, maybe some polenta?

Her mother frowned as if pretending to be insulted and said, tell me, when did I run out of corn when I made you breakfast?Your ribs are battered with polenta, you know. Jeff grinned at the corny jokes his mother used to tell at the breakfast table, and he read the paper while she began to prepare breakfast. Newspaper headlines were about civil rights clashes in Savannah and reports of a total solar eclipse in the northeastern United States in mid-July 1963.It's summer vacation, so he's at home in Orlando.But my God, it was a full three months after he was supposed to wake up!Pamela must be going crazy, she must be wondering why he hasn't contacted her yet.

Jeff hurried through his breakfast, ignoring his mother's advice to eat more slowly.He glanced at the clock in the kitchen.It was just after seven, and his father and sister would be up any minute.He didn't want to have a family talk with them about things he already knew to do. mom Um?She was frying some eggs for late risers, and answered in a somewhat absent-minded manner. Listen, I'm going out of town for a few days. What?Where are you going?Go down to Miami and meet Martin? No, uh, I have to go north. She looked at him suspiciously.Go north, what does that mean?You're going back to Atlanta so early?

I'm going to Connecticut.But I don't want to tell Dad, and I need some travel on the way.I'll give it all back to you soon. What the hell is Connecticut?Or should I ask who the hell lives there?Any girls you know at school? Yes, he lied, it was a girl studying at Emory, and her family lived in Westport Town.They invited me to stay with them for a few days. which girl?I don't recall hearing you mention anyone living in Connecticut.I thought you were dating a cute girl from Tennessee, the one named Judy. No more, said Jeff, we broke up just before finals. His mother looked at him with concern.You didn't tell me that's why you haven't had a good appetite since you got home?

No, Mom, I'm fine.No big deal, just a breakup.I really like this girl who lives in Sihanoukville right now, and I can't wait to meet her.So hide it for me, will you? Won't she be back at school when it starts in September?Can't you wait until then to see her again? I really want to meet her now and I haven't been to the Northeast.She said we could drive to Boston and hang out with her and her friends.Remembering the customs of the time and his mother's rules, Jeff added the last sentence quickly. oh i don't know Come on, Mom, this means a lot to me.This thing is really important.

She shook her head angrily.A kid your age takes everything seriously and has to do everything right away.Your father is looking forward to next week's fishing trip.you know how much he is When I get back, we'll go fishing.Listen, I'm going to find her anyway, I just wanted to let you guys know where I'm going, and it would be a huge favor if you could lend me some extra money.If you don't want to, then Well, you're old enough to go to college, which means you can already go where you want to go.I just worry about you.This is the duty of a mother besides borrowing money.She winked at Jeff and opened her purse.

Jeff threw a few clothes in the suitcase, put the two hundred dollars his mother had given him into a pair of rolled up socks, and was out the door before his father and sister got up. The old Chevrolet was parked in the curved driveway, next to my father's huge Buick Electra. The flagship model, the body is quite large.) and the rear of the mother Pontiac.When Jeff started the car, it made a familiar noise and then rumbled to life. Jeff's car drove out of the suburban housing estate where his parents lived, rounded Little Conway Lake, stopped at the intersection of Hoffner Street and Citrus Road, and sat for a while in the car with the engine running.Has the Billion Expressway to Beacon Point been covered?He can't remember.If it is built, it should be a shortcut to the North 1︱95 Highway.There was no mention of an inauguration in the papers, so traffic to Cocoa Beach and Tetusville shouldn't be too bad.But if the expressway hasn't been built yet, he'll spend a lot of time on the old two-lane road with holes in it.He decided to be on the safe side and go into town and take the 1-4 to Daytner.

Jeff drove through the sleepy town, not yet swept by the crowds brought by Disney, and just beginning to feel the overdevelopment of the space agency forty miles away.He drove onto Highway 1︱95 sooner than expected, tuned the radio to Jacksonville's WAPE station, and heard Steve Jr.Wanda's <Fingertips (Ⅱ)>, and then Marvin.Guy sings "Pride and Joy". three months.How did he lose three months this time?What does this mean?Well, it's no use worrying about it now, it's out of his control.Pamela must be upset, and she had reason to be, but at least he was going to see her soon.He told himself to just focus on it as he sped north through stretches of pine and scrub on both sides. It was noon when he reached Savannah.The interstate has a short road break there, slowing the journey; and the stern-faced, helmeted police officers around the elegant old town seem a little out of the ordinary.As Jeff walked cautiously through the barricade, he remembered the demonstrations and the racist violence that had taken place here this week.It was sad to watch it all repeat itself, but there was nothing he could do except to avoid bloodshed. A little after three o'clock, he stopped at Howard Park outside Florence, South Carolina.Johnson's quickly settles down for lunch with sandwiches.With Florida, mostly plains, and coastal Georgia behind, he continued to drive through the hilly country, keeping the powerful old car's speedometer above the regulated seventy mph speed limit. One place. It was late when he passed the side road leading to the boarding high school he had attended in Virginia.He had made a pilgrimage here on a whim many years ago, just to see the little bridge that had become a symbol of loss and futility in his heart.He could see the lights of the Ronday house from the highway; his handsome high school teacher, former sycophant, was supposed to be preparing dinner for her husband and child; it was the birth of the child.It ignited Jeff's adolescent jealous rage.Love your family well, Jeff silently blesses her as he sprints past the peaceful house on a beautifully landscaped hill.There is enough pain in this world already. He had a late dinner of fried chicken and sweet potatoes at a truck stop north of Richmond, where he bought a thermos and asked the waitress to fill it up with black coffee.It was midnight when he drove around Washington on the Beltway and reached Baltimore.In Wymington, Delaware, he turned onto the New Jersey Turnpike from Highway 1-95 to avoid the predawn traffic jams he would encounter through Philadelphia and Teton.As the night wore on, as he did at the beginning of every rebirth, he marveled at his youth again.When he was in his 30s and 40s, the journey would have taken at least two days and would have exhausted him. At four o'clock in the morning the Washington Bridge was like a dead bridge, Jeff turned the radio up at full blast, and Cousin Brucie followed Essex Orchestra's "Easier Said Than Done" is sometimes low and sometimes loud.As he passed the New England Expressway in New York, his mind was filled with images of Pamela he had never seen.She lived in this place in her first life, raised a family and died here. At that time, she thought that was the end of her life, unaware that she had just embarked on a journey of many lives. How was this death experience in Mallorca for her?Jeff mused.Would she accept it more calmly, more openly, knowing that this time they could find each other again, as he had died in the cabin by Montgomery Creek?he hoped.But he didn't want to think about her short but painful life.The past is the past, and now they can look forward to an infinite future with each other. When Jeff arrived in Westport Town, the first light of the morning had appeared in the eastern sky.He found Pamela's address in the phone book of a Shell gas station.It was too early to show up at her door this morning.He found a 24-hour coffee shop, and in order to kill time, he had to force himself to read the "New York Times" from beginning to end.The situation in Savannah was still quite tense, he read in the paper: Rove.Ginsburg is appealing an obscenity conviction for publishing Love magazine, amid growing controversy over a recent Supreme Court ruling against mandatory prayer times in schools. Jeff looked at his watch and saw that it was twenty-five past seven.Is eight too early?Pamela's family would have been up by then, probably eating breakfast.Should he disturb them during the meal?So what?he thinks.Pamela would introduce him to her family as a friend, and they would definitely invite him to dinner.He drank coffee nervously to kill the time until 7:40, and then asked the cashier of the cafe how to get to the address he had copied down. The Phillips house was a two-story neo-colonial on a shady street in an upper-middle-class neighborhood.The appearance is not much different from the houses in ordinary towns in the United States. Only Jeff knows that incredible things have happened here. He rang the doorbell and tucked the hem of his shirt into his jeans.Just when he suddenly regrets that he didn't change his clothes first, or at least find a bathroom to shave his beard who? The woman who answered the door looked exactly like Pamela, except that her hair was a little more shaggy, which was a little different from the boy with straight bangs and bangs that Jeff fell in love with later.She was about the same age as the last Pamela Jeff saw, and Jeff was distraught. Hello, may I ask Pamela.Is Phillips home? The woman frowned and pursed her lips in a slightly surprised expression that Jeff had often seen on Pamela's face.She is not up yet.Are you her friend from school? No, we didn't meet at school, but I really Who's at the door, Beth?A man's voice came from inside the room.Someone here to fix the air conditioner? no dear.He is Xiaopan's friend. Jeff shifted his feet uncomfortably.Sorry to bother you so early in the morning, but I really have something important to say to Pamela. I don't even know if she's awake or not. If you agree, let me go in and wait for her. I really didn't mean to cause you trouble, but So why don't you come in and sit down for a while?Jeff stepped into the small foyer and followed her into the comfortably furnished living room, where a man in a gray pinstripe suit stood in front of a mirror adjusting his tie. If the guy came this morning, the man said, tell him the thermostat he shut up when he saw Jeff in the mirror.Are you Pamela's friend?he asked as he turned to face Jeff. Yes. Does she know you're coming? I think so. I think so. What does this mean?Don't you think it's too early to show up at someone's house uninvited? David his wife reminded him of his tone. She knew I would come to her. This is the first time I've heard of it.Beth, did Pan mention to you last night that anyone would be here this morning? I don't remember this happening.but i'm sure What's your name, young man? My name is Jeff.winston. I don't remember Xiaopan mentioning this name.Do you remember, Beth? David, don't be rude to people.Jeff, would you like some cinnamon toast?I just made it and the coffee was freshly brewed. No, auntie, thank you very much, but I've already eaten. Where did you know our daughter?asked Pamela's father. Los Angeles, Jeff thought, feeling dizzy after a night of sleepless nights, too many cups of coffee and thousands of miles driven.He wanted to answer: I knew her on Montgomery Creek, in New York, in Mallorca. I said, where did you meet Pamela?You seem too old to be her classmate. We met through mutual friends, friends at the tennis club.This argument sounds convincing.She had told him she had been playing tennis since she was twelve. who's that person?I think we know most of Xiao Pan's friends, and Daddy!Did I leave the bonus coupon in your car?The book is almost full, but now I can't find her standing at the top of the stairs, with the slender hands and feet of an adolescent girl, wearing white Bermuda shorts and a yellow polo shirt over her ears Gather thin blonde hair into two short ponytails. Can you come over here, Xiao Pan?her father said.Someone here wants to see you. Pamela watched Jeff as she walked slowly down the stairs.He really wanted to run forward and hold her in his arms, and use a kiss to calm the torment she had been through for a while.But there is more time to do this, he suppressed his mood.Jeff smiled at her, and Pamela smiled back. Xiao Pan, do you know this young man? When their eyes met, her eyes were full of youthfulness and commitment. No, she said, I don't think I know him. He said he met you at the tennis club. She shook her head.If I ever meet him, I think I will remember.you know dennisHuimel?she asked Jeff naively. Majorca, Jeff's voice is hoarse with tension, the painting you sent me, the mountain sorry what did you say Whoever you are, I think you'd better leave now.His father interrupted their conversation. Pamela, oh my god, Pamela The man grabbed Jeff by the arm and led him to the door. Listen, you fellow, he said softly but commandingly, I don't know what you're up to, but I don't want to see you around here again.And I don't want you to come and harass my daughter again, whether it's at my house, school or tennis club.Nowhere.Do you understand? Sir, this is all a misunderstanding, and I'm sorry for the confusion.But Pamela really knows me, she People who know my daughter call her Little Pan, not Pamela.Let me remind you, she's only fourteen, have I made that clear enough?Are you getting the point?I don't want to hear you claim there's been a misunderstanding when the truth is you're molesting underage girls. I did not intend to cause distress.I just Then get out of my house before I call the police. Sir, Pamela will soon remember who I am.I just want to leave my phone number with your permission so she can get in touch with me Get out of here immediately and leave nothing behind. Mr. Phillips, I am so sorry to meet you in this way.I sincerely hope that we can get along well in the future, and I also hope that Pamela's father shoved him roughly outside on the steps and slammed the door.Jeff heard loud bangs coming from the living room window.Pamela was crying in bewilderment, her mother begging her to calm down, his father's shrill voice tinged with protection and reprimand. Jeff got back in the car, and he sat in the driver's seat, resting his head on the steering wheel tired and irritated.After a while, he started the engine of the car and headed home. Dear Pamela: I am sorry that my behavior yesterday confused you and pissed off your family.Someday you will understand, I hope that day will come soon.Then you can contact my family in Orlando, Florida.The phone number is 5559561.You can find me through them. Please don't lose this letter, keep it in a safe place.You'll know its use when you need it. Best regards. Jeff.winston July and August are hot and lazy summers, and only the storms that appear every afternoon can slightly relieve the hot and humid Florida dog days.Jeff went fishing with his father and taught his sister how to drive, but he spent most of his time in his room watching reruns of "Justice Defenders" and "The Deckard Show," waiting for the phone to ring. Jeff's mother was very concerned about him, his listlessness, his sudden loss of interest in friends and girls, and his late-night hangouts at drive-in entertainment venues.He wanted to get out of here, to escape the pressure of his parents' loving care, to escape Orlando, which was so boring that it made one's mind dumb, but he had nowhere to go.He is used to living an unfettered life, but now this freedom is greatly restricted by lack of money.KFC's Marseilles with Kidby and Belmont were over, and he had no other immediate source of income. The summer was over, and still no word from Pamela.Jeff returned to Atlanta, ostensibly for the start of his sophomore year at Emory University.He chose a full class, just to be assigned to the dormitory.He ignored the threatening letter from the dean's office and waited for his opportunity in October. Frank.Before Medoch graduated last June and is now at Columbia Law School, he hadn't even met his old partner.Jeff finds a slutty gambler in his senior class willing to help him bet on the World Series.Although he only asked for a flat pay; no one, no matter how generous, would want to take a cut of such an obviously stupid bet.Jeff bet nearly two thousand dollars and won $185,000.At least he doesn't need to worry about money for the time being. He moved to Boston and rented an apartment on Blue Sky Hill.History marches on familiar steps: Ngo Dinh Diem in Saigon is overthrown; John.Kennedy was assassinated again; the Holy See of the Vatican untied the thousand-year-old shackles that required the use of Latin for the Catholic Mass; the arrival of the Beatles inspired the hearts of Americans. In March, Jack.Ruby shot and killed Lee.Harvey.The week Oswald was sentenced and executed, he called the Phillips home; no one had heard of Nelson.The name Bennett.Mother Pamela answered the phone. Hello, please ask Xiao Pan to answer the phone, please? May I ask who is calling? My name is Alan.Coron, her friend from school. Wait a moment, I'll see if she's available for the call. While waiting for Pamela to pick up the phone, Jeff nervously rewound the phone cord.He had a hard time remembering the pseudonym, and Pamela had mentioned that she dated this guy for a while in middle school, but he wasn't sure they'd known each other by now?He has no way of knowing. Allen?hi, what's the matter? Xiao Pan, please don't hang up, I'm not Alan, but I have to talk to you. then who are you?There was more curiosity than irritation in her kitten-thin voice. I'm Jeff.winston.I went to your house one morning last summer, but Yes, I remember.My dad said I shouldn't talk to you. I can understand his reaction.You don't have to tell him I called.I just wonder if you're starting to remember something? What's the meaning?Like remember what? Oh, maybe it's a Los Angeles thing. Yes, of course I do. real? certainly.When I was twelve, I went to Disneyland with my friends.How could I not remember? I was thinking of something else.Maybe you remember a movie called "Star Sea"?Does the name sound familiar? I don't think I've seen that movie.Hey, you're weird, you know?Anyway, why would you want to talk to me? Just because I like you, Pamela, the only reason.Do you mind if I call you that? Everyone else calls me Xiao Pan, and I shouldn't be talking to you.I better hang up now. Pamela what? Do you still have the letter I sent you? I lost it.If my dad finds out, he'll be furious. It doesn't matter.I also left Florida, I live in Boston now.I know you don't want to copy my phone number, but you can look up my contact information.If one day you want to contact me How do you think I would want to do this?Guys, you're really weird enough. I think so too.But don't forget, you can call me anytime, day or night. I'm going to hang up.I think you should stop calling me. I won't be calling again, but I hope to hear from you soon. Bye-Bye.She sounded a bit reluctant, her youthful curiosity piqued by this young man who relentlessly bugged her with strange questions.But curiosity means nothing.He had always been a stranger to her, he thought sadly as he bid her farewell. After the Harvard Bookstore clerk put the money in the register, he handed Jeff the change and a copy of Candy he had just bought.The plaza outside the bookstore was packed with students getting ready to start the new school year, and Jeff noticed that they were all dressed up in deliberate sloppiness.He also caught a glimpse of a park near the university theater where "A Hard Day's Night" was showing. Young men with beards discreetly tout five-dollar boxes of marijuana.Since Li Rui and Aipu (Annotation: Psychologists, researchers and advocates of the use of psychedelic LSD. 1964 were dismissed from the Harvard Department of Psychology student psychedelics.) A year and a half has passed since he was expelled from Harvard and founded the short-lived International Inner Freedom Foundation in Emerson Square across the Charles River.In Cambridge the Sixties are remembered earlier than at Emory.Even so, the changing times are not yet complete.There was only one lone protester in Harvard Square, quietly handing out leaflets denouncing American intervention in the Vietnam War.At a table next to the newsstand, two students were selling books titled Stop Goldwater and LBJ 64 Running for president, portrayed by the Jensen camp as an extremely militant reactionary; LBJ is the abbreviation of Jensen's full name, and June 4 refers to the 1964 presidential election.) badge with the words.The time for their disillusionment is not far away. Jeff walked down the stairs of the subway station and into an old subway car that looked like an old light rail car.After passing Canmore Square, the train enters the ground and crosses the Charles River by the Longfellow Bridge.To Jeff's left, workers can be seen on scaffolding putting the finishing touches on the new Prudential Center;The Hancock Building is far in the future. He wondered what he was supposed to do now, was he going to face the future alone again, the long, empty years?It's been more than a year since his fourth rebirth, the hope he once had full of hope that he would be able to spend this cycle of life with someone he loved with all his heart, who met and experienced the same, but now his hope has been dashed.Pamela was a strange child, with no idea of ​​who she had been, of what she or he had been through. Maybe she was right about Eastern religions, though neither of them could understand why.Maybe she was fully enlightened in her last life, and her soul or spiritual essence or whatever, went into some form of bliss.If so, what else does an innocent little girl living in Westport Town have?Is she just a shell without a soul?Will the counterfeit of the real Pamela go through this life aimlessly?Maybe her purpose in life was a soulless robot like a living prop in a play or a movie; or maybe he should call her that instead.Maybe the incredible external force that kicked off the rebirth is just using a fake Pamela to maintain an illusion that the world continues to run on its normal, original course, that in this drama played out by billions of people, everything Still intact. But whose benefit is it for?Who is the audience that should be fooled?jeffUntil he met Pamela, he had thought he was the first and only one to have it; but perhaps he was the last, if not the last, at least the last, to know that it was an endless repetition.Pamela had reasoned that the years would repeat themselves until everyone in the world realized it.Is it possible that her theory is correct on a case-by-case basis, that it's set up as one person's enlightenment at a time, rather than the world's epiphany?Is it that when a person becomes aware of this fact, he or she is able to transcend and escape this endless cycle that was once believed to be true? This means that the entire history, past and future of humanity is nothing but a deception; nothing but false memories and records, deluded hopes, implanted in order to create this world.Human beings and their culture, technology, and chronicles are all pre-selected and pre-set by invisible forces. Everything happened in 1963. As far as subjective time is concerned, the time when humans really existed on the earth may be in 1963. Eight or eight years, or not long before it was over.This rhythmic cycle encompasses perhaps all of human experience, and the realization of this fact represents one's ascent to the highest level of consciousness. This in turn means that Jeff and everyone else have been unknowingly reborn for countless generations from the beginning of time; this may be his last life, just as the previous one was Pamela's last.That said, the others are either still in a preconscious state, or just scripted androids, whose real mind and soul have already transcended their bodies, just like Pamela.There was no way to tell whether the people he encountered were still asleep, or had already crossed over to another level of existence, leaving behind the living, breathing bodies that played out on the great stage called the world. It is too difficult to digest all this at once.Assuming the theory was true, he would have at least twenty-five years of his life to wrestle with it.After losing the only ideal partner he knew, now he just needs to decide what attitude to use to face the years. Jeff got off at the next stop.He walked along Charles Street, passing flower shops and cafes.From the open doors of the Turkey Head tavern came the nasal murmur of a local singer, and a sign outside the loft said the Crock Pots played every weekend.Many dignified old houses along Chestnut Street have been converted into apartments, with an elegant and quiet appearance. What should he do?Was it perhaps also his last to go back to Montgomery Creek and spend the rest of his life contemplating the wonders of the universe?Maybe it's his last, albeit negligible, attempt to improve the lot of humanity.Rebuild the future enterprise into a charitable foundation, and put all the hundreds of millions of dollars earned by the company into aiding Ethiopia or India. As he climbed the stairs to the second-floor apartment, he was circling countless competing ideas and impossible options.What if he just gave up and ended his life?He can A yellow envelope was tucked under his door, a corner of which could be seen from the corridor.He picked up the telegram and opened it to see: I've been on the phone all day.Where are you?I'm back!I'm back!I'm back!Come to me right away.I love you.Pamela When he arrived at Pamela's house in Westport Town, it was already after eleven o'clock that night.He had wanted to take a plane from Logan to Bridgeport, but there was no immediate flight at the airport.He decided it would be faster to drive, and completed the short trip in record time. Pamela's father answered the door, and Jeff saw his expression, and knew right away that things were not going to be easy. I want you to know that I agreed to this meeting only because my wife insisted.He even spared the polite words.Even my wife was persuaded to run away because Xiao Pan threatened not to let her talk to you. Mr. Phillips, I'm sorry to embarrass you, Jeff tried to be as sincere as I said last year, I never intended to cause trouble for your family.All are regrettable misunderstandings. Misunderstanding or not, this kind of thing will never happen again.I've spoken to the lawyer and he said we can get the injunction from the court by the end of this week at the latest.That means if you're around my daughter before she's eighteen, you'll be arrested.So no matter what you have to say to her, it's best to finish it tonight.do you understand? Jeff sighed, trying to squeeze through the half-open door.Can I see Pamela now?I will not cause trouble.But I've been waiting a long time to talk to her. Come in, she's in the living room.You have one hour. Pamela's mother had obviously just been crying, her eyes were red and frustrated.Her fifteen-year-old daughter sat on the same sofa as her.On the other hand, she looked calm, although the smile on her face told Jeff that she was trying to restrain the joy in her heart.Her ponytail has been cut, and her hair is combed into the same shape as her adult.She wore a cashmere sweater, off-white wool skirt, socks and high heels, and she applied light makeup on her face in a professional way.However, compared to the last time he saw her, the change in her was much deeper than the appearance.Jeff recognized immediately by her alert, intelligent eyes that this was the woman he had loved and lived with for ten years. Hey, he gave her a big smile back when he spoke, want to fly in the sky? She laughed out loud, a round, deep laugh full of grown-up sarcasm and worldliness.Dad, Mom, she said, this is my dear friend Jeff.winston.I think you've already seen it. What the hell is going on, how do you suddenly think you know this guy?Jeff could see that her father was also aware of the dramatic change in Pamela's voice and mannerisms, and resented that she had somehow grown up overnight. I think my memory must have skipped a stitch last year.You promised me that we would have an hour alone to talk.If you don't mind, let's start now, please? Don't leave the house, her father told them both sullenly, not even to set foot in the living room. Mrs. Phillips reluctantly moved away from her daughter.If you need us, your father and I are in the study. Thank you mom.I promise everything will be fine. As soon as her parents left the room, Jeff hugged her so tightly that she was barely breathless.My God, he whispered in her ear, where the hell have you been?What happened? I don't know, she said, standing back to look at him, I died in that house in Mallorca, on the expected eighteenth.但一直到今天早上我才開始這一次重生，知道這是哪一年時，我整個人都傻了。 我也遲到了，傑夫說，但只晚了差不多三個月。我已經等了妳一年多了。她摸摸他的臉，用溫柔的同情眼神望著他。 我知道，她說，我爸媽已經告訴我去年夏天的事了。 那麼妳不記得了？不對，妳當然不記得。 她悲傷地搖著頭。我對那段時間的唯一記憶是來自我的第一世。對我來說，我上次看見你是在安得拉港的碼頭，十二天前的事。 那幅素描，他邊說邊露出溫暖的微笑，真是太完美了。真希望我能保存下來。 你已經把它保存下來了，她輕聲說，在最有意義的地方。 傑夫點點頭，再次擁抱她。話說，妳是怎麼在波士頓找到我的？ 我打電話給你爸媽。他們好像知道我是誰，至少有點模糊的印象。 我第一次來找妳時告訴過他們，我在學校認識一個來自康乃迪克州的女孩。 天哪，傑夫，我認不出你的時候，你的感覺一定糟透了。 過去的事了。既然現在妳回來了，我反而有點感激看過妳十四歲時的真實模樣。 她露齒微笑。我敢打賭，不管你是誰，我肯定覺得你很帥。其實我還有點驚訝自己怎麼沒說謊，跟爸媽承認說認識你呢。 去年三月時我打過電話給妳。妳說妳覺得我怪裡怪氣的不過妳聽起來真有點感興趣的樣子。 我肯定是。 小潘？她父親的聲音從走廊傳來。都還好嗎？ No problem at all.she answered. 妳還剩四十五分鐘。他提醒她後，朝房子後方的房間走去。 This will be a problem.傑夫憂慮地皺起眉頭說道。 妳在法律上還未成年，妳父親跟我說要申請禁制令來阻止我見妳。 我知道，她不悅地說，有部分是我的錯。今天下午我告訴他我正在等你打電話或前來拜訪後，家裡簡直天下大亂了。我不知道他們以前就聽過你，當我提到你的名字時，他幾乎氣炸了，我想我的反應也沒好到哪裡去。他們從來沒從這年紀的我的嘴裡聽過那些話，除了第二次重生外，我那時候變得很叛逆。當然他們根本不記得有這回事。 你想他是認真想拆散我們嗎？如果他真決定這麼做，事情就會更棘手了。 不幸的是，我爸向來說到做到。我們暫時會有段艱難的路要走。 我們可以一起私奔。 潘蜜拉乾笑。不，我試過這條路了，還記得嗎？那次行不通，這次也一樣行不通的。 不一樣的是我現在有錢，我可以接觸到所有我們需要的資源。我們不會流落街頭。 但是別忘了，我還未成年。如果我們被抓到，你會惹上很多麻煩。 傑夫勉強露出微笑。誘姦未成年少女。這主意我挺喜歡。 我敢打賭你覺得這主意不賴，她打趣道，不過這可不是開玩笑，尤其在這個年代。夏季之愛（譯註：夏季之愛（Summer of Love）活動起於一九六七年，該年夏天有十萬名年輕人聚集在加州舊金山，將嬉皮運動推入了高峰。）還是三年後的事，一九六四年時，人們看待這種事是相當認真的。 妳是對的，他沮喪地同意，所以我們到底該怎麼辦呢？ 我們只能等一陣子了。再過幾個月我就十六歲了，也許那時候他們會答應讓我們約會，如果我從現在起好好巴結他們，把乖女兒的角色扮演好的話。 天哪我等了一年半才終於等到了妳。 我不知道我們還能怎麼辦。她語氣中帶著無限同情。我不會比你更高興看到這樣的未來，但我想我們目前沒有其他選擇。 對，他承認道，我們的確沒有選擇。 這段時間你打算做什麼？ 我想我會回波士頓。那是個迷人的城市，離這裡也不遠，而且我也安頓得差不多了。也許我會專心築好我們的愛巢，當我們能夠在一起時，就不必花心思在賺錢上了。我至少可以打電話給妳？還是寫信給妳？ 別寄到這裡，現在還不是時候。我會去租個郵政信箱，這樣你就能寫信給我了，我會盡可能時常打電話給你。放學後，從家裡以外的地方。 媽呀，妳真的要回學校去？ 我不得不，她聳聳肩，學校生活我應付得來。我已經唸過這麼多次中學了，我想我記得考試卷上的每個答案。 我會想妳的妳知道。 她給了他深長而熱情的一吻。我也一樣，親愛的，我也一樣。但等待是值得的。