Chapter 12 Chapter 12 Swing

Baozi turned his head from the bed and could see the wall clock on the wall. The hour hand was almost pointing to ten o'clock. He woke up once at seven o'clock. It seemed that he fell asleep again, and the dream he had just now remained in his mind. Time to wake up.After stretching, Baozi got up and got out of bed. Open the curtains, strong sunlight shines in.Since Baozi's house was built on a hilly land, the greenery in his field of vision is particularly rich, and the tops of tall trees are in front of him. Because of the sufficient sleep last night, Baozi felt particularly clear-headed and flexible, and her whole body seemed to be relaxed.

I worked overtime for four days last week, which is a busy time of year.Because as soon as the autumn wind is heard, orders for winter clothes flood in. For fashion designers, it is necessary to grasp people's new trends and design creative clothing styles.After a week of hard work, it finally came to Sunday. Baozi was going to spend the day doing nothing to let herself have a good rest. Hoko took out today's newspaper from the mailbox, then went to the kitchen to light the fire and make coffee.Then he went into the living room and unfolded the newspaper, turned on the TV, and lit a cigarette.

Must smoke less. Baozi made up her mind to quit smoking many times, but she gave up halfway. The first cigarette she got up just didn't taste very good, but she always reached for the cigarette box unconsciously when she was reading the newspaper. The fare increase of the state-run railway, the death of a koala in the zoo, and the serious traffic accident on the Dongming Expressway seem to have no good news recently. Baozi accidentally heard a place name that she had heard before appearing on the TV, so she raised her head and moved her gaze to the TV screen. The Japanese technical cooperation team sent to Cambodia had an accident during construction, and a Japanese technician died in the accident.The cause of the accident was an explosion of an oxygen cylinder

ah! Before Baozi could be surprised, a familiar name appeared on the TV screen, and her mind went blank in an instant. Nishizawa Daisuke, thirty-one years old. How can it be? But Baozi also knew the name of the company where the deceased was working, and his age was also suitable for two years younger than Baozi. Could it be him! Baozi jumped up from the chair and walked towards the phone in a trance, but she stopped after two steps. What am I going to do? Baozi himself didn't know what he wanted to do, he was just blindly panicked. The company that called Daisuke asked: Is Daisuke Nishizawa who died in the accident the one I knew?This is absolutely not going to work, first of all, it's Sunday and no one is at work.

Daisuke did go to Cambodia, and two months ago he sent a beautiful temple postcard to Hoko. He might visit the famous Angkor temple.The one who died must be Daisuke. But Baozi still didn't want to believe this was true, she kept changing the TV channel.Other stations were broadcasting the same news, and one station even showed pictures of the deceased. There is no room for doubt. The cigarette between his fingers has turned into a long ash, and the coffee pot in the kitchen has been boiling for a long time.Baozi stubbed out the cigarette butt, thinking: pour the coffee first and then talk.

At this time, the TV screen has become a commercial advertisement. Baozi turned off the TV, and the boiled coffee was extremely bitter. She wanted to confirm the news in the newspaper, but the newspaper hadn't published the news yet. Explosion accidents of oxygen cylinders on construction sites often occur. Newspapers and TV often report similar accidents, but Baozi never thought it would happen to her. is this real? Daisuke's family must be in a mess now.Both parents are there, and there is a younger brother, but Hoko has never met Daisuke's family. After a while, Hoko lit another cigarette, but he couldn't actually feel Daisuke's death, because it happened so suddenly and was so far away from him.

A man died, Baozi happened to know this man, that's all Did he not feel pain when he died? Daisuke always said: I hate pain.It would be fine if I didn't become a technician. However, Daisuke established such an ideal before he met Baozi, maybe all of this is destined. Unknowingly, Hoko's imagination began to expand. If he married me, I'm afraid he won't be able to escape this accident. The result should be the same. Even if he married Hoko, Daisuke would not change companies or jobs.As long as I do the same job in the same company, I will receive a mission to Cambodia and encounter the same accident.

However, we are not married. Baozi shook his head. Even if two people are combined, there is a chance for such an accident to happen, and there is a reason why they are not combined.Thinking about it carefully, Hoko seems to have predicted this kind of thing in the dark, because she always feels that Daisuke's life is very thin. Contrary to the feeling of the name, Daisuke is not a big man, but this does not mean that he is not tall enough, but that his overall impression is not powerful enough. Daisuke is a person who walks silently. When you notice him, he is already standing beside you unconsciously, smiling brightly.He is neat and feels like a plant.

Baozi turned her gaze out of the window, because she vaguely heard the creaking sound of the swing.But it was probably an illusion, the window was still far away from the small park, and the sound of the swing could not reach here at all. He's always there. In Hoko's mind, Daisuke was sitting on a swing with his waist bent and his legs stretched out, swinging around. At some point, the cigarette butts in the ashtray were lined up. Like the old photos scattered in a cardboard box, Hoko's memories of Daisuke are scattered in her mind without any context.It is not an easy task to organize these memories, which one comes first?Which is next?

The two got acquainted with each other on the train on the Keihin Tohoku Line.At that time, Baozi was working in a large textile company, and Daisuke was still a college student, so he happened to go to that company for an internship.At that time, there were seven or eight college students who came to practice from various universities. Daisuke was a student of the Civil Engineering Department of the Industrial University.Most interestingly, he often wears a cement-colored suit. Since there are very few young men in the company, Baozi is somewhat concerned about the arrival of these men. For a man, he's a little skinny.

This is probably Hoko's first impression of Daisuke. Soon, Hoko discovered that Daisuke took the same tram to and from get off work as herself. Where do you live?Baozi asked Daisuke. Sakuragi Town. Ah yes. This is a conversation between the two at the company. When Baozi boarded the tram home after get off work, Daisuke was standing by the door.It seemed that he also knew that Hoko commuted to and from get off work on the Keihin Tohoku Line. Where do you live? Oimachi. In the crowded tram, the faces of the two were very close, but Hoko couldn't remember what they said at that time. After that, they met several times on the tram, and gradually became familiar with each other.Maybe Daisuke intentionally went with Hoko.Baozi was aware of this, but it wasn't to the point of annoying her. it's up to you. Baozi thought so at the time. At least Daisuke isn't that annoying guy, and it's obvious at a glance that he's a serious guy.Urban and fragile, if it is not well maintained, it is easy for him to become discouraged all of a sudden.Playing with a man's emotions is also one of the badges a woman has.Moreover, Baozi was still young at that time. What kind of neighborhood is Oimachi? Similar to other neighborhoods. can i get off with you Why? I want to see what Oimachi is like. please. It's impossible for Baozi not to know Daisuke's intentions, such a clumsy excuse, but he is a student, so that's all he can do.After Hoko and Daisuke left the station, they found a coffee shop in front of the station to drink coffee and chat. They have had this kind of experience four or five times. Yokohama is a good place, right?Baozi asked this not because she had any plans for Daisuke.Oimachi, where she lives, is only a 20-minute drive from Yokohama. Although it is very close, Hoko has never been to Yokohama.But judging by the photos in the magazine, it was a beautiful city.She would really like to go there if she had the chance. Well, that's a good place, let me be your tour guide. OK, some time. After finishing speaking, Baozi forgot about it, but after Daisuke finished his internship and left the company, he wrote to Baozi specifically: I must take you to visit Yokohama. Baozi was hesitant at first, but then he thought: What's the big deal?So I was invited to Yokohama. It was a crisp autumn day, and Hoko came to Yokohama.Daisuke took him to visit the cemetery of foreigners, the hilly park where you can see the port, the boundary markers of the old city, and Yamashita Park. Although he is no longer a child, Daisuke still took Hoko to Nogeyama Zoo. However, it was indeed a happy day. After finally coming to Yokohama, you must go to Chinatown to try Chinese cuisine. OK. Although the restaurant is not beautiful, the taste of the food is very delicious. You know Yokohama well. Because I grew up here. Um. When it was time to settle the accounts, the assistant was about to hand over the money. I'm still a student, so that's not good. This should be a considerable expense for Daisuke. Soon, it happened to be Baozi's birthday, and with gratitude for the hospitality last time, Baozi decided to invite Daisuke back, just like a sister would invite a younger brother to dinner. Why don't you find a girl younger than me?At an Italian restaurant in Ginza, Hoko joked as she rolled penne pasta with a fork. Young girls are too naive. Haha, that sounds like how mature you are. Do you think I'm boring? that's not Hoko didn't want to develop further, and Daisuke didn't propose to have a relationship with her. It's good to keep the relationship as it is now. Although Daisuke is still a college student, he is very knowledgeable and it was fun to talk to him.The two of them date once a month or so. They eat together and watch movies together. The relationship between the two is closer than that of ordinary friends, but it is not a romantic relationship.This relationship lasted for about a year. On Hoko's birthday the next year, Daisuke showed up with a present. Baozi felt very embarrassed, because she had to tell Daisuke something. That day, the two of them went to Yokohama again, and Hoko, who had little knowledge of Yokohama's geography, could not remember what places they had traveled.Finally, they came to a small park with a view of the sea. The sun has slanted to the west, the sky is dyed dark red by the setting sun, and there are sail shadows of ships returning to port in the bay.There were few people in the park. Baozi sat on the swing, stretched his legs, and said to the front: I am getting married. This sentence may be cruel. However, Baozi left room for saying this from the very beginning. The swing next to it creaked slightly. ah, is it? Are you surprised? No, when is the wedding? Early next year. Congratulations! Hoko turned her face to Daisuke, who was watching her.Eyes met, Daisuke was smiling in the afterglow of the setting sun. I know, this is probably an excuse. Let's stop here.okay? What can I do? Although I like you, I am still a student.I give up. I am not playing with your heart, I am also very happy during the days of being with you.You are a very good friend and I treat you like a younger brother. Then I am satisfied. For a split second, the two made the aforementioned exchange with their eyes. The swing was swinging silently, and it was getting dark before I knew it. Can't we meet again in the future? yes sorry! It doesn't matter. go back? Um. At the exit of the park, Hoko stretched out his hand to Daisuke. While shaking hands, Hoko closed his eyes and moved his lips closer, perhaps to express his inner apology.The result was a short, awkward kiss. Three months later, Baozi got married. Her husband was a man she dated before meeting Daisuke.This is the real man, and Baozi has never connected Daisuke with marriage. The wedding was held at a hotel in Akasaka, and the wedding trip went to Hawaii.For Baozi, this marriage may only be happy during that time. After returning from the wedding trip, her husband was transferred to Hakata due to work, and Hoko went with him, and moved to Hiroshima a year and a half later.In retrospect, the two cities are very similar in Hoko's impression.The size is about the same, the population is about the same, there are rivers passing through the city, and there are no acquaintances in the small reinforced concrete house, waiting for the husband to come home every night until late. The husband is shrewd and capable at work, but he is not very disciplined in the relationship between men and women.Before getting married, Baozi had such worries, but in real life, it was much worse than Baozi imagined.There are even inexplicable women who come to the house to protect the child and don't want to think about it anymore. Daisuke can only send a postcard to greet her during Chinese New Year and the hottest summer. Although there are not a few words on it, sometimes it can make Baozi cry with joy. Five years passed in pain like this, and Baozi's heart was broken when she returned to Tokyo. Of course, Baozi also did something wrong, but when she learned that her husband had transmitted STDs to her, she made up her mind to divorce. Baozi left a letter of unfeelingness and ran away from home. It is the luckiest thing to have no children.The other party may have been psychologically prepared for a long time, so they did not encounter any obstacles when going through the divorce procedures. Baozi's father had passed away, so he couldn't go to the home of his mother and elder brother.Since Baozi had worked in a textile company before, she found a job in a design company without much effort.With a small amount of alimony, she bought a two-bedroom, two-living room. Since then, Baozi has started a single life as a woman. When the feelings of these years came to an end, Hoko wrote a short letter to Daisuke. One day not long after, Baozi came back from get off work and found a small note stuck in the crack of the door.The note reads: I am helping in the park below.Baozi recognizes this handwriting. Where is the park? Baozi remembered that on the way home from the subway station, there was a park covered by big trees. It seemed to be a place for children to play, so Baozi never went in once.There is a stone path at the gate of the park leading to the depths of the park. Baozi put the bag in the living room and hurried downstairs. Hoko heard the creaking sound of the swing, which brought back memories of the time when she and Daisuke parted. ah! Daisuke's smile appeared in the darkness, this smile is still so familiar. Have you been waiting here for a long time? No, I am watching the moon. A new moon hangs in the sky like a background prop on a theater stage, and faint clouds flow past the moon like flowing water in the sky. Baozi was sitting on the swing next to him. Long time no see. six years. Oh, yes. During this period, the woman divorced and the man became a company employee. Have you decided? decide what? When are you going to get married? not yet. It always felt unnatural for the two of them to sit like this. The man came to visit the house on purpose, probably because of something. In the letter, Baozi had already briefly described the process of her divorce. It was very dangerous to invite a man to the home. let's go. Um. The two walked towards the shopping street. When I was young, I used to dig holes in the beach to play. Yes, and then what? Even the shovel at home was taken out, ready to dig deep holes to build underground fortifications. Is it ready? Of course it's impossible, relying on the strength of the child to dig at most half a person's depth. Then what? Then it had to be transformed into a trap. Hate. The two chatted aimlessly, almost walked through the block, and finally found a coffee shop with a small facade. Are you still smoking? Daisuke looked at Hoko's fingers and said.This is a vice that Baozi developed during the gray years. Yes, this is the legacy of marriage. Why divorce? It's hard to say.Is your company busy? When it's busy it's busy. Daisuke said that he was going to Hokkaido tomorrow morning, and the reason for his sudden visit seemed to be for this reason. Are there many opportunities for business trips? Go here for a while, go there for a while. The relationship between the two is not as easy as it used to be, and great changes have taken place in each other's lives.Baozi has decided to live alone, because it is too troublesome to have a relationship with a man.Moreover, I don't know what Daisuke is thinking now. Can you go back to Tokyo often after you leave? I can come back once in about two months. Yeah? I'll contact you when I get back, okay? There's nothing wrong with it, but you'd better use your precious time more effectively.Baozi said in a cold tone. Baozi didn't want people to think she was weak, she was tired of men, and she didn't need help.Being pestered all day by a man you don't hate is the most troublesome thing.Daisuke should find a girlfriend who is suitable for him, even if he doesn't have one now, there will be one day. That's it for now, bye!You have to get up early tomorrow, and I have work to do. When will I see you next time? Let it be fate. Um. It was not easy for the two to part in such a mood. Hoko thought that Daisuke would never contact her again, but who knew that Daisuke would come to her every time he returned to Tokyo.After seeing and talking a lot, Baozi gradually recovered her former mood. Not good, it seems to be gradually returning to the time when I first met him. Is it difficult?How to do it? Sometimes Daisuke shows up out of the blue without prior contact.In this case, Daisuke would put a message note in the crack of the door of Baozi's house, and then wait for her in the small park downstairs.From the position of the swing in the park, you can see whether the lights in the house of Hoko's house are lit. On the day of Baozi's birthday, Daisuke asked for leave and came back from Hokkaido to visit her. What is this person thinking? Baozi would think so every time they met. The answer is clear at a glance, because I like Baozi so I came to visit her.Daisuke is waiting for Hoko. It is impossible for Baozi to be unhappy. But Baozi didn't want to go any further because: The feeling for Daisuke is not the kind of love between a man and a woman. Can't be defeated by loneliness. And living alone is good, and the work is very smooth. If you want to say it's easy, it can't be easier than it is now.Although I never thought of living a life like this for the rest of my life, let's live freely like this for now. One night, Hoko meets Daisuke as usual. I'll take you back. OK. It's still early today. The two walked near Baozi's house, and without anyone's suggestion, they walked towards the small park unconsciously. He might have something to say. Baozi felt a sense of uneasiness in her heart, and she had this feeling since we met tonight.She didn't want to ask, if Daisuke said it, maybe he would never be able to meet as easily as now.Therefore, Hoko tried not to give Daisuke a chance to speak. uh that Whenever Daisuke wants to speak, Hoko will take over. I can smell goulash. Goulash? Yes, potatoes and beef are stewed together. ah. The taste of home cooking. Miss it? No, I can make it myself if I want to eat it. yes. Daisuke, who was distracted from the topic, walked forward silently.At the end of the stone-paved road was the pair of swings. When he came to the swings, Daisuke suddenly showed a surprised expression and said: Does this park have only one entrance? yes. Just now, when we came in, we didn't see anyone, right? Asked this, Baozi remembered that he passed by a young man when he entered the door, but Daisuke didn't notice it, which shows that he has been thinking about something with all his heart. I didn't see it, what's the matter? Daisuke pointed to the swing with his chin, and the swing was swinging. Why? Someone must have been there just now. What? Perhaps Daisuke was also avoiding that important topic, which seemed even more important to him. I feel strange. Maybe it was the wind. The swing next to it was also shaking slightly. No, if it is blown by the wind, the swing will swing back and forth, but if it is still shaking sideways, it means that someone has been sitting on it. You observe very carefully. Daisuke might have been observing this phenomenon while he was waiting in the park for Hoko to come home. I have something to say to you today I think it's better not to talk about it today. Do you think so? Well, I don't know why. Then do as you say. Daisuke's feelings must have been hurt that night. After that, Daisuke still visited Hoko every few months. In the middle of the night, whenever Baozi felt the sound of a swing, she would think: Is he here? Baozi hurried to the window and looked towards the small park. Soon, Daisuke decided to join a technical cooperation mission to work in Cambodia. I wish you to find a bride as soon as possible, do you want me to introduce you to you? At that time, the relationship between the two people was relaxed enough to make such a joke. Baozi recalled a story she read when she was a child: an asteroid hit the earth, and it was getting closer and closer, but the orbit of the asteroid deviated a little bit, and it ended up saying goodbye to the earth forever.The relationship between Daisuke and Hoko is similar to that in the story. Daisuke told Baozi the departure date, but Baozi didn't plan to go to the airport to see him off, because his family and company colleagues would all go to the airport, and Baozi felt that he was not suitable for that occasion. Daisuke sent several postcards to Hoko from Cambodia. Baozi also wrote several letters back to him. After half a year, I returned to Japan.This is the content of Daisuke's last letter. Baozi called Daisuke's company and asked about the time and place of the funeral. Daisuke's funeral was held at Ximing Temple in Yanaka, on Saturday afternoon, when Hoko was free.Baozi should go to his funeral. Daisuke's parents are very sad, and the person who looks like him should be his younger brother.Many people from the company also attended the funeral, but Hoko always felt that they seemed to be quite indifferent to Daisuke's death. There was a long mourning line in front of the altar. The photos are well taken. Daisuke in the portrait is smiling, and that bright feeling is unique to him.One more glance couldn't bring Daisuke back to life, so Hoko hurriedly left the temple. Daisuke's voice and smile couldn't get out of his mind. Am I a selfish person? Baozi began to doubt himself. After truly feeling Daisuke's death, Hoko's first feeling was something like: I'm lost.It's not because Baozi has any expectations for Daisuke's future, but because he regards him as his last and safest stronghold.So losing Daisuke made her feel extremely sad. He has hope for me. Daisuke likes Hoko, and he wanted to confess his love to Hoko several times, but he didn't say anything.Baozi has been trying to prevent him from speaking out. I should have been nicer to him. Now Baozi really had this idea. It's autumn again, and Baozi's birthday is approaching. Will Daisuke come? Somewhere in Baozi's heart was looking forward to this. After Daisuke died, no one would celebrate Hoko's birthday anymore, and birthday celebrations were no fun at all.To be honest, even Baozi herself forgot about her birthday. As soon as he lay down on the bed, Baozi suddenly wanted to go for a walk.So he got dressed and put on a shawl and went out.The slender crescent moon hangs alone in the sky like something dropped by someone. Occasionally, there will be gusts of cold wind. The road leading to the park was dark and there was no one there. ah.Baozi couldn't help crying out. The swing in the park is shaking slightly. One was swinging back and forth under the blowing of the wind, while the other was shaking slightly sideways. According to Daisuke, someone must have been sitting on it just now. Did he really come? It was already dark.Daisuke waited for a long time but did not see Hoko, so he got up and left.Baozi lit a cigarette and took a slow, deep puff, watching the swing until it gradually stopped.