Chapter 6 Six shadows at the end of the world
When the girl put the first ancient dream on the table, I couldn't recognize it as the so-called ancient dream for a moment.I stared intently for a long time, then raised my face and looked at the girl standing beside me.She didn't say a word, just looked down at Gu Meng on the table.I don't think this object quite fits the name Gumeng.What I think of from the charm of the word ancient dream is an ancient book, or some other object whose shape is far blurred.
This is ancient dream!The girl spoke.His tone was indifferent and unreliable, rather than explaining to me, he was talking to himself to confirm something.To be precise, the ancient dream is here.
I was puzzled, but still nodded.
Pick it up and have a look.she says.
I gently held it in my hand and scanned it carefully with my eyes.But in any case, there is no trace of the ancient dream, there is no clue to catch, it is just a piece of animal skull.The animal was small, and the surface of the bone probably became very dry due to long-term exposure to sunlight, losing its inherent color.The long protruding jaw opened slightly, as if suddenly frozen when he was telling something.Two small eye sockets, although they have lost their eyeballs, are still staring at the expanding empty room.
The skull is unusually light, so it has lost all sense of existence as an object, and there is no residual warmth of life in it.All flesh and blood, memory, body temperature are gone.There is a rough pit in the middle of the forehead.I stuck my finger on the pit and observed it for a long time, thinking that it might be the remnant of the horn being pulled out.
Is it the skull of the town unicorn?I try to ask.
She nodded and said quietly: The ancient dream penetrated here and was sealed.
From here can read the ancient dream?
This is the job of a dream reader.
How to deal with the read dream?
It doesn't matter what to do, just read it out.
This is not easy to understand.I said, I understand the point of reading ancient dreams from it, but so far it is inexplicable.If so, I feel that this work is meaningless.Generally speaking, all work should have a purpose, such as transcribing dreams and sorting them in order.
The girl shook her head: As for the meaning, I can't explain where the meaning is.I think as long as you keep reading, I'm afraid you will feel it naturally.But in any case, the meaning thing has little to do with the work itself.
I put the skull back on the table and looked at it again from a distance, surrounded by a deep silence reminiscent of nothingness.But this silence does not come from the outside, but may be gushing from the inside of the skull like smoke.In short, it is an incredible silence, almost as if the skull is tightly connected to the core of the earth.The skull remained silent and turned its disembodied gaze to a point in the void.
The more I looked at it, the more strongly I felt that the skull was telling me something, and there was even a sad atmosphere around it.But I couldn't express this sadness accurately.I have lost the proper language.
Just read it.talking.I took the skull on the table in my hand again, and measured the weight with the palm of my hand.Anyway, I seem to have no choice.
The girl smiled slightly, took the skull from my hand, carefully wiped off the dust on the surface with a double-layer rag to increase the brightness, and put it back on the table.
Well, let me tell you how to read Gu Meng.She said, of course, I'm just putting on a show, but I can't actually read it, and what I can read is limited to you.Take a good look: first the skull should be facing you.Place the fingers of both hands gently on the temples.
She pressed her fingers to the sides of her skull and looked at me emphatically.
Second, fixate your gaze on the forehead of the skull.Don't force your gaze, but gently and softly.But you can't look away, no matter how dazzling you are.
Dazzling?
um, yes.While staring, the skull begins to glow and heat, and you can quietly touch the light with your fingertips.Then you can read the ancient dream.
I repeat in my head the sequence the girl said.I can't imagine what kind of light she is talking about and how it feels, but the general sequence is already clear to me.While staring at her slender fingers on the skull for a long time, a strong feeling hit me before I had seen this skull somewhere in a trance!The whiteness of the washed bones and the small pit on the forehead gave me a wonderful spiritual shock, just like when I saw the girl's face for the first time.As for whether this is an accurate memory fragment or an illusion brought about by the instantaneous distortion of time and space, I have no way of judging.
What's wrong?the girl asked.
I shook my head: nothing, think about something.I think I can remember the order you just said.Only the actual operation is left, right?
Let's eat first.She said that she couldn't squeeze in time when she was working.
She brought a pot from the small kitchen inside and set it on the stove to warm up.In the pot is chowder.There are onions and potatoes.After a while, the pot heated up and made a pleasant sound.The girl put the food on the plate.Serve with walnut-stuffed bread.
We sat opposite each other, putting things into our mouths in silence.The food itself is very simple, and the seasoning is all I have never tasted before, but it is not bad by any means. After eating, I feel warm all over my body.Hot tea followed, dark in color with herbal bitterness.
Dream reading is not as easy and comfortable as the girl said.The light was too weak and chaotic like a labyrinth, no matter how concentrated the fingertips were, they couldn't touch them smoothly.But I can still clearly feel the existence of the ancient dream at my fingertips, it is like a graphic sequence surging forward.But I can't grasp it as a definite image, I just feel that it exists.
It was already past ten o'clock when I finished reading the two dreams.I returned the skull that released the ancient dream to the girl, took off my glasses, and slowly rubbed my already stagnant eyeballs with my fingers.
kind of.I replied that my eyes were still not used to it, and when I looked at it, my eyes sucked the light of the ancient dream, so that my head started to hurt, although the pain was not very severe.In short, the eyes became blurred, and there was no way to keep a close eye on them.
It was like that at first.She said that at first her eyes were not used to it and it was difficult to read smoothly.But it doesn't take long to get used to it.Don't worry, just take it easy for a while.
I'm afraid it's as good as that.
After putting Gu Meng back into the library, the girl began to prepare for get off work.She opened the furnace cover, took out the red-burning coals with a small shovel, put them into a bucket filled with fine sand and buried them.
Don't take fatigue to heart.My mom always told me that, she said.She said that the body may not be able to do anything about fatigue, but the mind must be freed.
But to be honest, I don't quite understand what the mind is.Don't know its exact meaning, don't know how to use it.Just remember this word.
The mind is not used.I say that the mind just exists there, like the wind.You just have to feel the rhythm of it.
She covered the stove, took the enamel pot and cups inside to rinse, put on a blue coarse cloth coat that looked like a sky that had been cut off and lost its original memory for a long time, and stood in front of the extinguished stove thoughtfully a long time.
Are you here from elsewhere?The girl suddenly asked as if remembering.
Yes.
What kind of place is there?
I don't remember anything.I said, sorry, I really can't remember anything.It's as if the memory of the ancient world disappeared when he was deprived of his figure.Anyway, it's a far, far place.
Do you remember what a heart is?
I think I understand.
My mother also had a heart to come.She said: Unexpectedly, it disappeared when I was seven years old.It must be because your mother has the same heart as you.
disappear?
Well, disappear.But let's not talk about this.It is inauspicious to talk about disappearing here.Tell me about where you have lived.Can you remember one or two?
Only two I can think of.I said, one is that there is no fence there, and the other is that we all walk with shadows.
Yes, we drag our shadows.But when I came here, I had to hand over my shadow to the gatekeeper for safekeeping.
It is impossible to enter this town with a shadow.Say the gatekeeper, either give up the shadow, or give up the town, it's your choice.
So I abandoned the shadow.The gatekeeper told me to stand in the open space by the gate.The sun at three o'clock in the afternoon printed my figure clearly on the ground.
Don't move!As he said that, the janitor took out a knife from his pocket, inserted the sharp point of the knife into the gap between the shadow and the ground, swiped left and right for a while, and cut the figure off the ground neatly.
The shadow trembled a few times as if resisting, but because it had been separated from the ground, it finally lost its strength and sat limply on the stool.The shadow that left the body looked much more shabby than expected, with a tired look.
The gatekeeper withdrew the blade, and watched for a long time with me the figure that had left the body.
How, the shadow after independence is quite strange, right?He said that the shadow thing was useless, it only added weight.
Sorry, looks like I have to be away from you for a while.I went to the side of the shadow and said, I didn't plan to do this at first, but I really have to, so you can bear it for a while and stay here alone, okay?
Temporarily refers to how long?asked Shadow.
I said I don't know.
Are you afraid that you will regret it in the future?The shadow said in a low voice, I don't know the details, but it doesn't seem quite right to separate people and shadows.I think there is a problem here, and there is a problem with this venue.Man cannot exist without shadow, and shadow cannot exist without man.However, the two of us are safe and sound when we are separated from each other.There must be something wrong with this.Don't you think so?
I also think it's really unnatural.I say, but everything about this place is unnatural from the start.Where it is unnatural, there is no other way but to move unnaturally.Shadow shook his head.
Pure reason.I don't believe in truth.The air here is not for me, not like the air in other places, neither for me nor for you.You shouldn't abandon me.Didn't the two of us cooperate very well before, why did you want to get rid of me?
In the end, it was too late.The shadow has been stripped from me.
Settle down in a few days, and I will lead you again.I said, this is an expedient measure after all, and it will not last forever.The two will always be together day and night.
Shadow sighed slightly, and looked up at me with weak, defocused eyes.The sun shone down on the two of us at three o'clock in the afternoon.I lost my shadow, and the shadow lost its body.
That's probably just wishful thinking on your part.Shadow said: Things will not go your way.I always have a bad feeling.Or look for a chance to escape from here, and the two of them will return to the original world together!
I can't go back to the old place, and I don't know how to go back.You don't know the same, do you?
For now.But I'm trying to find a way back.I want to talk to you from time to time, when will you come see me?
I nodded, put my hands on Shadow's back, and walked towards the gatekeeper.All the time I've been talking with Shadow, the janitor has been picking up stones from the square and throwing them out of the way.
As soon as I was beside me, the porter wiped the white dirt off his hands with the skirt of his shirt and placed a large hand on my back.I can't tell if it's an expression of intimacy or an attempt to let me know the strength of his hand.
I will keep your shadow carefully.The janitor said that three meals a day were guaranteed, and he was allowed to go out for a walk once a day.So just rest assured, there is no need to worry at all.
Can we meet each other from time to time?
Well, said the gatekeeper, it is impossible to be free all the time.But it is not impossible to meet, if the time comes and the situation permits, I am interested.
If I want to ask you to return the shadow, what will happen?
It seems you don't quite understand the system here.The janitor still had his hand on my back, a place where no one was allowed to be shadowed, and once in there was no way out.In other words, your question just now is meaningless.
In this way, I lost my shadow.
Walking out of the library, I offered to take the girl home.
Don't send me off, she said, I'm not afraid of the dark night, and besides, it's the opposite direction to where you live.
Would love to give away.I said, I seemed very excited, and I couldn't fall asleep right away when I went back.
The two of us walked south across the old bridge side by side.The still chilly spring breeze swayed the willow branches on the sandbar in the river, and the moonlight pouring straight down cast a layer of shining silver light on the cobblestone road under your feet.The air is moist and heavy, lingering on the ground.The girl tucked her once loose hair back into a bunch.After coiling it forward, it was stuffed into the windbreaker.
Your hair is very beautiful.I said.
Thanks.
Has someone complimented your hair in the past?
No.you are the first.
How does it feel to be praised?
have no idea.talking.She looks into my face.With your hands in your windbreaker pockets, I know you're boasting about my hair.But that's not quite the case.My hair constitutes something else in your mind You're talking about that, aren't you?
No no, I'm talking about your hair.
The girl smiled faintly, as if looking for something in the air.Don't be surprised, I'm just not used to the way you speak.
It's ok, you'll get used to it soon.I said.
The girl's home is in the worker's residential area.This area is located in a corner of the factory area, quite desolate.In fact, the factory itself is also a bleak scene.In the past, the Grand Canal was full of green water, and freighters and yachts shuttled back and forth, but now the water gate is tightly closed, and the water section can be seen everywhere.The hard white clods bulged out like the wrinkled corpses of huge ancient creatures.The wide stone steps on the river bank for loading and unloading goods are no longer useful, only lush weeds are intertwined along the stone steps.Old bottles and rusted machine parts poked out of the mud, while flat-deck wooden boats decayed aside.
On the banks of the canal, deserted and abandoned factories continue one after another.The doors were closed, the window glass was gone, the walls were covered with ivy, and the banisters of the safety stairs were rusted and overgrown with weeds.
Passing through the factories lined up along the river is the staff residence.All are five-story old buildings.The girl told me that it was originally an elegant apartment for rich people, but with the changes of the times, it has been divided into sections for poor workers to live in.But these workers are no longer workers today.Almost all the factories on which they depended for employment have closed their doors.A suit of technology is also useless.At most, a little odd job as the town demanded.The girl's father was also one of the workers.
After crossing the last stone bridge with low handrails in the canal, you will see the area where the girl's house is located.The buildings are connected by long corridors, reminiscent of the ladders used for siege in the Middle Ages.
It was almost midnight, and almost all the windows were out of lights.She took my hand and walked quickly through the maze-like south road as if avoiding the sight of the giant man-eating bird overhead.Then he stood in front of a building and said goodbye to me.
Good night.
After speaking, I walked up the west hillside alone and returned to my residence.