Chapter 11 chapter Ten

one The doctor came, the same doctor who had treated Martha when she thought she was pregnant last time, and he gave Shifra.Pue gave a shot.Later, the ambulance came.Martha sent her to the hospital.A few minutes later, a policeman knocked on the door.Herman told him Shifra.Pue had been taken to the hospital, but he said he had come for theft.The police asked Hermann for his name, address and his relationship to the family.Herman faltered and faltered, his face turned pale.The police looked at him suspiciously and asked him when he came to the United States and whether he was a U.S. citizen.The policeman wrote something in a notebook and left.The woman next door took her pillow and sheet back.Hermann waited for Martha to call him from the hospital, but the phone did not ring for two hours in vain.

As night fell, there were no lights in any room except the bedroom.Herman unscrewed the light bulb in the bedroom, took it and walked to the room where he lived.Unexpectedly, it hit the doorpost all of a sudden, and the filament of the light bulb was shaken and rustled.He screwed the light bulb on to the lamp beside his bed, but it didn't work.He went to the kitchen to look for matches and candles, but found nothing.He stood by the window, looking at the night outside the window.The tree, which a few hours earlier had shimmered sunlight in every leaf, now stood black in the darkness.Only one star shone in the reddish sky.A cat moved cautiously across the yard and onto the clearing among the scrap metal and rubbish.Shouts, the din of vehicles, and the muffled rumble of the elevated train echoed in the distance.Hermann felt a melancholy he had never felt before.He couldn't be alone all night in this wrecked, unlit room.If Xifra.Puu is dead, and her spirit may come to haunt him.

He decided to go out and buy some light bulbs.Besides, he hadn't eaten anything since breakfast that day.He leaves the apartment, and just as the door closes, he remembers that he forgot his key in the room.He searched all his pockets, and knew that the key was nowhere to be found.He must have left the key on the table.The phone in the house rang.Herman pushed the door, but it was closed tightly.The bell kept ringing.Hermann pushed the door open with all his might, but it wouldn't budge, and the phone kept ringing. This is Martha!Martha!Talian Shifra.I can't remember which hospital Pue was taken to.

The phone stopped ringing, but Hermann was still standing at the door.He couldn't decide whether he should break the door open.He was sure the phone would ring again soon.He waited for five minutes before going down the stairs.Just as he reached the gate facing the street, the phone rang again, and it rang for a long time.In the constant ringing of the bell, Herman imagined he could hear Martha throwing a fit.He could see her face contorted in pain. It's pointless to turn back.He walked in the direction of Tremont Avenue.Go to the cafeteria where Martha used to work as a cashier. He decided to have a cup of coffee, then went back and stood on the stairs waiting for Martha to come home.He walked all the way to the counter.He touched the vest pocket and found a key, the key to his Brooklyn home.

Instead of ordering coffee, he thought of calling Tamara, but all the phone booths were occupied.He wanted to be patient.Even eternity is not eternal, the thought flashed through his mind.If the universe had no beginning, then an eternity has already passed.Hermann smiled.Back to Zeno [Note: Zeno’s paradoxes are a series of philosophical paradoxes about the indivisibility of motion proposed by the ancient Greek mathematician Zeno. ]'s unconventional weird theory is up!One of the three callers hung up.Herman hurried in.He dialed Tamara's number, but no one answered.He withdrew the coins, and without thinking twice, called home in Brooklyn.He needs to hear a familiar voice, even if it is the voice of an unfriendly person.Jadwija ​​wasn't home either, and he let the phone ring a dozen times.

Herman sat at an empty table, and he decided to wait half an hour before calling Martha's home.He took a piece of paper out of his pocket and tried to calculate how long they would last him and Martha with the money they had.Since he didn't know the bus fare at all, it was a complete waste of effort.He counted, scribbled, and checked his watch every few minutes.How much would he get if he sold the watch?Not more than a dollar. He sat there trying to sum up what he had been through.In the hayloft he had fancied that the world would change in some fundamental way, but there was no change.The same politics, the same words, the same false promises, the professors went on writing about the ideology of murder, the sociology of torture, the philosophy of robbery, the psychology of terror, and so on.Inventors created new weapons for killing people.Talk about culture and justice is more disgusting than talk about barbarism and injustice.I've been caught in the garbage, I'm garbage myself.There's no way out, Hermann muttered.teach?What is there to teach?What qualifications do I have to teach?He felt nauseous and nauseous, the same way he had been at the last rabbi's dinner.Twenty minutes later, Hermann called Martha's house, and she came to listen.

From Martha's voice he heard Shivra.Pue was dead.Her voice was monotonous, in contrast to her usual over-dramatic style of describing the most mundane things. how is your motherHe still asked her. I don't have a mother anymore, Martha said. Neither of them spoke. Where are you?Martha asked after a moment.I thought you would always be waiting for me. God, when did she die? He died before reaching the hospital.On her deathbed she said: Where is Hermann?Where are you?Come right back. He rushed out of the cafeteria and forgot to return the bill to the teller, who yelled after him.He tossed the list to her.

two Hermann had expected the neighbors to be with Martha, but there was no one else in the house.The apartment was as dark as when he had left it.They stood side by side in silence. I went downstairs to buy light bulbs and shut myself out, he said, do you have any candles? Why are you here?No, we don't need candles. He took Martha into the room where he slept.It's a little brighter here.He sat down in a chair and Martha sat on the edge of the bed. Does anyone know about this?Hermann asked. Nobody knew, and nobody cared. Shall I call the rabbi? Martha didn't answer.He thought she might not have heard him out of grief, but she suddenly said: Hermann, I can't take it any longer.This involves going through various procedures and money.

Where is the rabbi?Are you still in a nursing home? He was there when I left, but he should have flown somewhere else.I forgot where that was. I tried to get in touch with his family.do you have matches where is my handbag If you brought it back, I will find it. Herman got up and went to look for the handbag.He had to feel his way like a blind man.He felt the kitchen table and chairs.He wanted to go to the bedroom, but he was afraid.Did Martha leave her handbag at the hospital?He went back to Martha. I can not find. I put it here.I took the house key out of my bag. Martha stood up, and they fumbled in the dark. A chair knocked over and Martha helped it up.Herman groped his way into the bathroom, flicking a switch out of habit.The light came on and he saw Martha's handbag on the lid of the laundry basket.The thieves forgot to unscrew the light bulb from the medicine cabinet.

Hermann picked up the handbag, surprised at its weight; he shouted to Martha that the handbag had been found and the bathroom light bulb had not been stolen.He glanced at his watch, but it stopped because he had forgotten to wind it. When Martha came to the bathroom door, her face was changed, her hair was disheveled; she squinted at people.Hermann handed her the bag.He couldn't look her in the face.He turned his face away when he spoke to her, like a pious Jew who is not allowed to look at a woman. I have to fit this light bulb into the lamp holder next to the telephone. what?Well, Herman took off the light bulb very carefully and held it close to his body.He was grateful that Martha had neither scolded him nor cried or made a scene.He fitted the bulb to the floor lamp, and when the light came on he felt a surge of joy in his heart.He called the rabbi and a woman answered the phone.Lamper Rabbi went to California.

Do you know when he will come back? For at least a week. Hermann understood the meaning of the words.If the rabbi was here, he would take care of all the formalities and possibly pay for the funeral.Hermann hesitated, then asked where the rabbi could be contacted. I can't tell you, the woman replied too graciously. Hermann turned off the light, not knowing why he did so.He went back to his room.In this room Martha sat with her handbag on her lap. Rabbi went to California. Um Where do we start?Hermann asked Martha, and at the same time asked himself.Martha has said in the past that she and her mother do not belong to any of the organizations and synagogues that handle funerals for their own members.Everything costs money: funerals, cemeteries.Hermann had to meet officials, ask for favors, loans, guarantees.But who knew him?He thought about animals.They live without entanglement, and they don't bother anyone when they die. Martha, I don't want to live anymore, he said. You promised me before that we would die together.Let's die together now, I have plenty of sleeping pills, enough for both of us. Well, let's swallow these pills, he said, not sure if he really meant it. The pills are in my handbag, all we need is a glass of water. We have boiling water. His throat constricted and he could barely speak.He was embarrassed by what had happened and how quickly it had come to a head.Martha fumbled in her handbag, and he could hear keys, coins, and lipstick tubes bumping and rubbing against each other.I always knew she was my angel of death, he thought. Before I die, I want to know the truth, he heard himself say. What truth? Have you been faithful to me since we were united? are you loyal to meIf you speak the truth, so will I. I'll be honest. Wait, I want to smoke a cigarette. Martha took a cigarette out of the pack.She does everything slowly.He heard her turn the tip of the cigarette between her thumb and forefinger.She struck a match, her eyes fixed on him questioningly in the light of the flame.She took a drag on the cigarette, then blew out the match, which stayed on for a while, making her nails red.Well, let's hear it, she said. Hermann had a hard time getting it out.I've only been with Tamara once.that's it. when? When she lived in the Catskill Mountains Hotel. You've never been to the Catskills. I was telling you that Lamper Rabbi was going to Atlantic City for a conference.Now it's your turn, Hermann said. Martha smiled. What you did with your wife is what I did with my husband. Does that mean he's telling the truth? That's right, that's it.I went to ask him to agree to divorce me, and he must do so.He told me that this was the only way I could get a divorce. You solemnly swear and swear that he is lying. My oath is false. They sat in silence, each thinking of his own thoughts. There was no reason to die now, Hermann said. what do you want to doLeave me? Hermann didn't answer.He sat upright, his mind blank.Then he said: Martha, we must go tonight. Even the Nazis allowed Jews to bury their dead. We're not Jewish anymore, and I can't stay here any longer. What do you want me to do?I will go to hell for the next ten lifetimes. We are already in hell. At least let's wait until the funeral is over, Martha said reluctantly. Hermann said: "I have to go now. Wait a moment.I will go with you.I'm going to the bathroom. Martha stood up.She shuffled along, the heels of her leather shoes scraping the floor.Outside, the tree stood motionless in the darkness.Hermann said goodbye to it.For the last time he bothered to speculate on its mystery.He heard the splash of running water; apparently Martha was washing her face.He stood calmly, listening eagerly, amazed at himself and at Martha's willingness to go with him. Martha came out of the bathroom.Herman, where are you? I'm here. Hermann, I cannot leave my mother, Martha said quietly. You have to leave her anyway. I want to be buried next to her grave.I don't want to be buried among strangers. You will be buried beside me. You are a stranger. Martha, I have to go. Wait a moment.In that case, you go back to your country folks.Don't leave your child. I'm leaving no one, Hermann said.