Chapter 21 nineteen

Xiao Scorpion is a pessimist.I can't help but discount his words.However, I have personally witnessed the students graduating before enrolling and slaughtering the principal and teachers; no matter how much I doubt Xiaoxie's words, I can't argue with him.I can only inquire from other aspects. So, there are no scholars in Cat Country?I asked. have.And a lot.I saw that Xiaoxie was about to joke again.Sure enough, without waiting for my question, he went on to say: Having more scholars is a sign of cultural superiority, but on the other hand, it is also a phenomenon of cultural decline. It depends on how you define a scholar.Naturally I will not define a scholar, but if you would like to see our scholars, I can call them.

Come on, you mean?I correct him. call!Please, they don't come, you don't know the temper of our scholars; just wait and see!Fan, call some scholars and say that I will give them fan leaves to eat.Calling Xing, the flowers will help you find them separately. Going out with a smile on his face. I seemed to have nothing to ask, and I just waited for the scholar. Xiaoxie brought some fan leaves, and we both chewed slowly, with a mischievous smile on his face. Mihexing, Hua, and a few other women came back first, and sat in a circle to surround me.Everyone looked at me with an air of wanting to speak but not daring to speak.

Be careful, Xiaoxie smiled at me, someone is going to interrogate you! They all chirped and laughed.The fan spoke first: Let's ask something, shall we? OK.However, I don't know much about women.I also learned Xiaoxie's smile and tone. Tell us, what are your women like?Everyone is almost unanimous in asking. I know I'll answer very interestingly: our girls put white powder on their faces.Everyone oh.The hair is neatly arranged, some are long, some are short, some are parted, some are pulled back, and they are all rubbed with perfume and sesame oil.Everyone opened their mouths wide, looked at the short hair on each other's heads, and then closed their mouths together, as if extremely disappointed.There are pendants on the ears, some are pearls, some are gems, and the pendants shake back and forth as they walk.Everyone touched the small ears on the head, and some of them seemed to want to pull the ears off.Wear the best clothes, even though you are wearing clothes, but try to show some muscles, which are faintly visible, and look better than you who are all naked.I was deliberately joking with the fans: naked body only has the beauty of muscles, but the color of the muscles is too consistent. Wearing clothes of various colors, there are brilliance and colors, so our women are not opposed to being naked, but Wear something even in the hottest summer.She still wears shoes, leather and satin, all with high soles, with beads on the toes and flowers embroidered on the heels. Are they good-looking?I wait for their answer.Those who didn't make a sound, everyone's mouth became a capital O.In ancient times, some of our women bound their feet so small. I pinched the index finger and the big finger together for comparison. Now, the feet are not bound at all. Instead, everyone came out together before I finished this sentence. He said: Why not wrap it up?Why not wrap it up?Confused!The feet are so small, how beautiful, and the small toes are inlaid with a small bead, how beautiful!Everyone seemed to be really moved, so I had no choice but to comfort them: Don't be busy, wait until I finish talking!Didn’t they not bind their feet, but they all wear high-soled shoes, the toes are here, I pointed to the tip of the nose, the heels are here, I pointed to the top of the head, and the height can be increased by five inches.It looks good, and the foot bone socket is broken, and sometimes you have to walk against the wall, and if you break a bottom, you can jump up and down!Everyone was satisfied, but the more satisfied they were with the women on earth, the more disappointed they were with themselves. Everyone gently hid their feet under their legs.

I waited for them to ask me some other questions.Well, everyone seems to be fascinated by high-soled shoes: How high are the soles, you say?a question. There are flowers on the shoes, right?Another question. Hiccups when walking?Another question. How to break the foot bone?Did the shoes bend naturally after putting on the shoes, or did you bend the bones of the feet before putting on the shoes?Another question. Made of leather?Can human skin work?Another question. embroidered?What flower?what colour?Another question. If I knew how to make tanners and shoes, I could have made a fortune then, I could see.

I was about to tell them that our girls can do more than wear high-soled shoes, when the scholars arrived. Fan, Xiaoxie said, go prepare fan juice.He also said to the flowers, you go elsewhere to discuss high-soled shoes. Eight scholars came, entered the door and saluted Xiao Xie, then sat on the ground, all raising their faces and looking up, they didn't even bother to give me a glance. Mi brought the fan leaf juice, everyone drank it slowly and closed their eyes, as if they didn't bother to look at me anymore. It's just right that they don't look at me; I just look at them carefully.The eight scholars were all extremely thin and dirty, with two pockets of dust in the small ears on the head, and two piles of spittle on the corners of their mouths. Their movements were extremely slow, many times more sinister and slow than the movements of the big scorpions. .

Miye's power seemed to reach the root of life, everyone opened their eyes and looked up again.Suddenly one said: Are the scholars in Cat Kingdom my number one?His eyes turned around, and he took me by the way. The other seven were moved by this sentence, some scratched their heads, some gritted their teeth, some put their fingers in their mouths, and said together: You first?Even your father, no, even your grandfather, they are all bastards! I thought this was about to start a fight.Who knows, the one who claimed to be the number one scholar laughed instead, probably because he was used to being scolded.

My grandfather, my father, and myself have all studied astronomy for three lifetimes, all of them have studied astronomy, what are you!Foreigners use many instruments and mirrors to study astronomy. We have been passed down from generation to generation to only use the naked eye, which is not a skill; we pay attention to seeing the relationship between astronomy and life, can foreigners understand this?Yesterday I watched the sky at night, and the literary stars were above my head. Who are the domestic scholars but me? If I stand under Wen Xing, it will be on my head!Xiao Xie said with a smile.

My lord is right!The astronomer fell silent. My lord is right!The remaining seven also added a sentence. For a long time, everyone was silent. Say it!Xiaoxie gave the order. One person said: Are the scholars in Cat Country my number one?He turned his eyes around.Can astronomy be considered knowledge?No one knows, it doesn't count!Reading must first be literate, and calligraphy is the only knowledge.I have studied calligraphy for 30 years. For 30 years, who of you dare not admit that I am the number one scholar?Who dares? Let your mother's fart go!Everyone said it together. Physiologists are not as honest as astronomers. They grabbed a scholar and shouted: Who are you talking about?You pay my debt first, did you lend me a lost leaf that day?Pay me back, pay me back at that time, otherwise, if I don’t screw your head off, I won’t be counted as the number one scholar!

I will lend you a lost leaf, just rely on me, a world-renowned scholar, lend you a lost leaf, let me go, don't dirty my arm! Don't admit it after eating other people's fans, well, you wait, you wait until I write a general theory of calligraphy, except your surname, I will tell the world as the number one scholar in China, that there is no such thing as ancient characters. Without your last name, just wait! The scholar who borrowed the lost leaf and refused to admit it was a little scared, and begged Xiaoxie: Sir, sir!Lend me a lost leaf quickly, so I can pay him back!Adults know that I am the number one scholar in China, but scholars are people without money.Since poverty is real, maybe I borrowed a fan leaf from him to eat, but I don't really remember it.My lord, I have to ask you one more thing, please intercede with the boss, and give the scholar some more lost leaves.It’s okay for others not to have lost leaves, but we scholars, especially me, the number one scholar, how can we learn without lost leaves?You see, my lord, I have recently discovered that our ancient criminal law does have the theory of skinning alive. I will soon write an article and dedicate it to my lord, begging him to forward it to the emperor in order to restore this interesting, Criminal law with historical basis.With this discovery, is it considered the first scholar?Alphabet, what!Only history is true knowledge!

Is history written in words?Give me back a lost leaf!The philologists are very firm. Xiao Xie asked Mi to take a fan leaf to the historian, and the historian pinched half of it and handed it to the philologist, returning it to you, it shouldn't be! The philologist took half of the fan leaf, gritted his teeth and said: Give me half less!You wait, I won't be blamed if I don't steal your wife! When they heard about their wives, the scholars seemed very excited, and they all said to Xiaoxie: My lord, my lord!Why should we scholars have one wife per person, and why are we so anxious that we want to steal other people's wives?We are scholars, my lord, we win glory for the country, we preserve the knowledge left by our ancestors for future generations, why shouldn't each of us have at least three wives?

Xiao Xie was speechless. Let’s just talk about stars, a big star always has several small stars, the same is true for celestial bodies, and so is human nature. As a first scholar, I prove that a person should have several wives; Very useful! Let’s talk about fonts. In ancient times, most of the characters were created next to the characters for women. It can be seen that wives should be the majority.As the first scholar, I prove that there should be more than one wife; besides, it is inconvenient to write down the following words. The scholars took the status of the first scholars to prove that wives should be in the majority, and they all produced evidence that is inconvenient to write.I can only say that the woman in the eyes of this group of scholars is just that. Xiao Xie didn't say a word. You think you are tired?we, we, we, Fans, give them some fan leaves and tell them to get lost!Xiao Xie closed her eyes and said. Thank you, my lord, for your understanding!Everyone read together. Mi brought Mi Ye, and everyone snatched it up. While saluting and thanking Xiao Xie, they scolded each other and walked out. Just as this group of scholars went out, another group of young scholars entered.It turned out that they had been waiting outside for a long time, because they were afraid of meeting the elderly scholars, so they waited for a long time.Old and new scholars encounter at least two lives. This group of young scholars looks much better, not thin, not dirty, and very lively.Come in, first salute to Mi, then greet me, and then sit down.I feel better, and feel that there is still hope for the cat country. Xiao Xie whispered in my ear: These are all scholars who have been abroad for several years and know everything. Fan brought fan leaves, everyone was very lively competing to eat happily, my heart was cold again. After eating the fan leaves, everyone started talking.What are they talking about?I don't understand a word!I have learned a lot of new words from Xiaoxie, but I can't understand the words of these scholars.I only heard some voices: gurgling, babbling, Didong Didong, what is Hualavsky doing? I was a little anxious, because I was eager to understand what they were saying, and they kept telling me, but I couldn't answer at all, I just nodded and smirked like a fool. What is Mr. Foreign wearing on his lap? Pants.I replied, feeling a little confused. What did you do?A young scholar asked. How did you do it?asked another. What degree do the pants represent?asked another. Is there a class with trousers and a class without trousers in your country?asked another. How can I answer it?I had to pretend to be silly and smirk. Everyone seemed disappointed that I didn't get an answer, and they all came over and touched my torn pants with their hands. After reading the pants, everyone grunted again, Didong Didong, Hualavsky got up, I was almost suffocated! After everyone had finally left, I asked Xiaoxie what they were talking about. Where are you asking me?Xiaoxie smiled and said, who should I ask?They didn't say anything. Flower Rawski?I remember this sentence.I asked. Flower Rawski?And Totovsky, don't you hear?too much!They only link some foreign nouns together to speak, and others don't understand it, and they don't understand it either, and they just listen to the excitement.Those who can speak in this way are the new scholars.I know that Hualavsky's words are getting lucky in recent days. No matter what happens, it's all Huaravsky. Parents beat children, emperors eat fan leaves, scholars commit suicide, it's all Huaravsky.In fact, this word is referred to as a chemical effect.When you meet them again, you just talk nonsense, Hualavsky, Tontovsky, Dafusky, and they will think you are a scholar.As long as nouns are used, no need to worry about verbs. Adjectives only need to add a word under Fusiji. What do you mean by looking at my pants?I asked. Fans ask about high-soled shoes, new scholars ask about pants, the same effect.Young scholars tend to be feminine, and they pay attention to cleanliness, beauty and fashion, old scholars pay attention to the one who directly captures women, and new scholars pay attention to flattery.Just wait and see, it will be strange if all the young scholars put on pants in a few days. I felt that the air in the room was too sad, so I ignored Xiao Xie and walked out.Outside the door, a group of women were leaning on the wall, with two bricks under their heels, practicing walking on their toes.