Chapter 11 Letter Ten Parenting

Being a parent is the highest position bestowed by God, but it is also the most difficult thing. My lovely young mother: My heart was filled with great joy when I saw your baby yesterday.Standing next to you and looking at the white and fat newborn baby, I can't help but think of the first time I saw you, my first child.And now seeing you also in such incomparable, almost majestic bliss I consider myself a very happy man for that reason.If you can share this happiness with me, my joy will be even greater. You know, in the first few months, you may feel exhausted, and you may even feel that you can't take it anymore.The baby who is like sunshine in your eyes will definitely not sleep with your normal routine, and will cry non-stop when hungry.The number of times she asks you to change her diapers must be jaw-dropping.I know you will of course comply with her request.God has given earthly parents ample patience for this purpose.Then, one day you will be surprised to find that your daughter has grown into an enviable mature woman under the infinite warmth and eternal love and care of your husband and wife.

I know that you love your baby deeply, and the baby also feels loved by you. However, the baby needs your affection most in the first few years after birth.Parents have the greatest influence on their children during this period, which is the opinion of most psychologists.Babies who are completely helpless, of course, can only get a sense of security by relying on others.So tease her with words, cuddle occasionally, and give her what she wants with patience and love, depending on how happy you are.During this period, the hearts of parents and children need to be connected together, because this is the way that the child's personality, sense of well-being and outlook on life are completely formed.

Whether you can succeed depends entirely on your performance in the first six years.A sense of connection between parent and child that lasts a lifetime is formed during this period.For you, this is just a short period of time, but for your daughter, it is the time when everything is decided by others and the danger is the highest.Most of the poor, emotionally unstable people are victims of inadequate affection. In the long years, it is inevitable that there will be days of suffering because of being a daughter, but I dare say that the days to come will definitely become infinitely happier.Great bliss awaits you.When a baby smiles for the first time (if I tell you it's a baby hiccup, you probably won't believe it?), when the first tooth comes in, when it first waddles and boldly learns to walk, when it's the first time it's tied itself. shoelaces, and seeing Santa Claus for the first time.In fact, raising children is not just to feel happy and magical about seeing many things in the growth stage, but to take good care of children with wisdom and dedication. This is the task of being a parent.

Parents must pay special attention to their children's upbringing during their upbringing.The best parents are those who, with patience and love, teach their children healthy values, morality, and self-control.The sooner such teaching begins, the better.In fact, the mistake most parents make is to start teaching their children too late.Therefore, most of the parents and children will taste the bitter fruit in the future.As the twig bends, the tree leans. Doesn’t this sentence of Alexander, Bob, the British poet in the early eighteenth century, give us any inspiration? As they grow, they will imitate your actions, words, and emotional ups and downs, that's for sure.You will become a role model for your children, and in the eyes of your children, you will become an all-knowing and omnipotent superhuman mother in the long run.The position that parents occupy in a child's heart can be said to be extremely high. Parents have to feel that they have a great responsibility for this.When parents lie, children lie too.Children learn how to cheat when they see their parents cheat.If a parent hates someone, the child will also have feelings of hatred.A child's heart is like a sponge, absorbing what it sees.All the words and deeds of the parents will be absorbed by the children in the growing period, and will become the vast majority of the children's personality in the future.

In the course of your life, you have created a commendable personality.Kindness, integrity, self-control, industriousness, sense of humor Your personality advantages can be said too numerous to mention.Just as you can't stop talking about your daughter, I can't stop talking about things that compliment you.However, the conclusion I would make is this: Your daughter has all the same great qualities as you, so who else in the world can encourage, promote and nurture her in the right way?Apart from parents, there is absolutely no third person who can do this kind of teaching.By the time she reaches her cardamom age, educating her on the important issues of sex, morality, self-esteem, and how terrible alcohol and drugs can be, is hopefully yours, or yours as a couple, and no one else will.

What can parents do to steer the helm in order to steer clear of difficulties as children grow up and start sailing the oceans of life?What kind of help can parents give when their children are struggling on the journey of life?The first thing parents should do at this time is to analyze the problem, and tell their children the impact of the matter with a sincere attitude.In addition, the second thing to do is to maintain your child's respect and love for you.As long as there are such feelings, the child will restrain himself in his actions as much as possible in order not to disappoint or humiliate you.After such an emotional connection sprouts in your body, you should always pay attention to everything your child does!Including schoolwork, extracurricular activities, summer camps, hobbies, travel, and any kind of little thing, give encouragement everywhere, so that this connection will become stronger and stronger.

Always respect the personality of children, and this must never be forgotten.After your child starts to understand, you should start talking to her about common sense, self-esteem, and sense of responsibility as soon as possible.Such discussions will deepen the relationship and understanding between parents and children, and among the many virtues you have, the most sure thing that can bind your children's eternal love for you is tolerance. When a child causes a problem, there are usually stages in the parent's response.The first reaction was to be furious, and then I felt ashamed for expressing my emotions; then why did I do such a thing?And sighed endlessly, finally calmed down and thought about what to do in order to restore the lost things and continue to communicate?However, parents must clean up the aftermath at this time, because they are adults.At this time, parents often get angry because they are overly concerned about the safety and happiness of their children. In fact, if you want to achieve ideal results, you should suppress your feelings, talk and anxiety at this time, and handle things with a rational attitude.At this time, the child already knows that he has made a mistake.You don't need to repeat this in front of her.What you should emphasize is rather that the child will lose the trust of his family and friends, and most importantly, his self-esteem, as a result of this unconscionable behavior.After that, you should help your child find ways to correct it with the aim of not making the same mistake again in the future.

Bribes are sometimes a means to get a desired result.Yes, I said bribes.Frankly speaking, I have used this method many times in the past with you brothers and sisters.The reason I did that was to let you guys know that good deeds are rewarded, (won't the whole family be overjoyed every time you and your brother achieve a difficult goal even if it's done under the lure of bait ?) If you want to adopt this strategy in the future, you can only do it once in a while, in moderation, and at the same time, be cautious.Otherwise, it is wrong to let children think that they will definitely get paid.

In the event of a serious problem, it may be necessary to call for expert assistance.However, no matter how heinous the child suffers from, you have to be the support of the child.The deeper the problem, the fewer friends there will be, and the more the child will need the constant support of the mother. The room is messy, wet towels are thrown around after taking a shower, toothpaste caps are not covered after brushing teeth, and shoes with mud stains go into the kitchen. Scolding, nagging and cursing non-stop.I have never seen a child without such ailments.In fact, these are just small problems, is it worth your loud scolding?I remember I told you before that if you disagree with your child, even if it is difficult, you still have to sit down and have a good talk with him.Talk with a rational attitude, and children may still listen, but if you shout angrily, they will definitely plug their ears.

The joys that only a parent can feel are too numerous to list.If you and your mother were to write down the sweet memories of raising your siblings, I don't know how many notebooks will be used.On your second birthday, you used to paint chocolate cake all over your face, you baked little cookies in a toy oven that was your brother's favorite food, you used to mess with your mother's makeup on your face Painted, wore your mother's high heels, went to your brother's school to see their makeup parade and your school's parent-child dance, and you had your first real date with your boyfriend in Bermuda, which made me And your mother feels that our family has the mood of a young girl growing up.

Fortunately, I can still watch you and your brother grow up and be happy, and immerse myself in such sweet memories.If your mother and I can live a long life, one day, the four of us with silver-white hair will look at each other with the same emotion, right? Is this the little girl I once hugged? Is this the little boy I used to play with? I don't know when I will grow old.don't even know When did these two become so big When did that girl become so beautiful? When did that boy get so tall? The two are still young Wasn't that not so long ago? Excerpt from "Fiddler on the Roof" The father who is infinitely happy to be a grandfather for the first time