Chapter 9 Chapter nine

one When Tom hit puberty, life came back and his mind got busier.Like a cicada shedding its skin, he left the world of children.The world becomes larger and more complex, full of excitement, power and new meaning.The child explores the world with bodily senses such as touch, smell, and sight. The taste of fish, meat, onions, the softness of the petals of a pansy flower and its hue, and the sense of the shape of things he touches with his fingers. The world still exists, it just loses its novelty.He seems to have changed a person completely, the new vision makes him see more profoundly; the new heart makes him feel deeper; source, meaning, purpose, etc.

Ever since Flora told him that God exists, he began to think endlessly.He seemed to be facing a complex algebra problem. Flora told him the answer X∥349, but it was one thing to know the answer, but another thing to know what formula to quote and how to calculate the answer.The answer calculated by the first mathematician has no meaning to Tom, and it cannot satisfy Tom's pursuit of the bottom line.Why were we born into this world?Why do people have to go through the process of birth and death?If people must die in the end, why should they live?If people don't die, how do they continue to live?Do we know what it means to live?Is our life no different from the death of an insect when it ends?An inexplicable sadness gripped Tom's heart tightly.

He went to Central Park, mainly to see the zoo there.He could stand for ten minutes looking at red-bottomed gibbons and orangutans, imagining how the animals thought and what they were thinking.On the sidelines, he often wondered what the Lions thought of the band and the bright lights.He also often gazes long at rhinos and hippos.Once he went to the Bronx Zoo and saw a group of flamingos, and was awed by their bright colors and serene demeanor. After returning home, he still thought about the mystery of the life essence of the flamingos.Was his life like that of the flamingos, or was it more real and more precious than theirs?He couldn't figure it out.In the eyes of giraffes, are humans just a bunch of ridiculous dwarfs?Maybe, maybe more likely, they don't care what kind of animal humans are.Why did the buffalo look at him with hatred?Why does the sticky silk spit out by spiders not dry out in the air?

There was another question that bothered Tom even more.In the Bronx Zoo there is a tropical bird garden, there is a South American fishing bird with a huge and powerful peck ten inches long, there are hummingbirds about two inches long, and a parrot with beautiful feathers, Their regal Parisian crest would have made the ladies of Fifth Avenue jealous.But it was the larks that Tom noticed most, with their long, sharp black eyebrows above their eyes, as if they had been drawn in with a painter's brush.Why do skylarks have eyebrows?He observed carefully, the thin eyebrows were composed of many small feathers, and the surrounding hairs were all white, which made the beautiful line of hair more clear.Tom knew that even the larks didn't know how they got eyebrows like that, any more than he knew how he got nails.These birds and animals are so real and so complex.He once thought that skylarks sang and painted their eyebrows to please people, and that male birds painted their eyebrows to attract the hearts of female birds so that they could reproduce.But why do they want the next generation?Who cares if they have a next generation?People call reproduction instinct, but that doesn't solve the problem in Tom's mind, which he calls the feather problem.

He spotted the problem in wild skylarks, and found it everywhere, such as the gold rings on the peacock's tail and the stripes on a bird that roosts by the lake.How do they have special feathers?He went to the public library and read many books, but he couldn't find the answer he was looking for in the book.The book only says that during the reproduction of living things, there will be unforeseen and countless varieties, and the ones that can best adapt to the environment will survive.He refused to accept such an answer.Could it be that the sticky silk of the spider, and the chemically complex venom of the viper, have been produced through unforeseen, infinite varieties?If it produces venom by accident, does it also accidentally pass on its secret recipe to its offspring, so that the viper can exist in the most adaptable situation?Their venom is extremely potent and deadly stuff.Tom thinks this is not a question of the survival of the fittest, but a question of how only the animals that can best adapt to the environment will appear in the world, and how these animals survive.The question on his mind wasn't how the giraffe survived on its neck, but how it got such a long neck.How do jellyfish have those stinging whiskers?How can an electric eel release hundreds of volts of electricity?And why do some deep-water fish carry a lantern in front of their eyes?We can only say with certainty that life is full of secrets.This answer is so helpless.Can those scientists find the answers to these questions?This question troubled Tom for several years, until he met a girl named Elsie.

Every time he was in Central Park, he had new doubts and sorrows, and he was ignorant of life's problems.He liked to walk to the creek near Seventieth Street, beside the cool path, and lose himself in the face of the rocky creek.Sometimes he lay down on the grass and felt himself one with the soil of this good earth.Lying on the soft green grass, you can see the green grass, the clean fur and bright eyes of the little squirrel, or look at the skyscrapers standing in mid-air, with neat rows of windows.What a contrast between people needing to work hard and happy little squirrels busy playing all day long!On cloudy days, skyscrapers are half-hidden by clouds, and only then do skyscrapers look a little better.If there is wind, the tops of these large buildings will flicker between the clouds, and at this time these buildings seem to be rising upwards.If the sun goes down at dusk, the shadow of the building will also move with the change of the sun's position, just like a ship sailing in the sea.

two When Christmas came, the Feng family also attended the worship service.Father has lived in this country for more than thirty years, but he has never been to church.He once stood for a moment by the church door, purely out of curiosity.He knew about the church, but the church had nothing to do with him. Tom, Eva, and Mom were so moved by Flora's talk that they went with her to the Italian Church in Chinatown.There are not many Chinese in this church, and most of the people who come here are poor people, and most of them are women.Mother Feng regards going to church this time as her first social activity in Western society.She could meet Americans inside the house instead of watching them hurry down the street.Those old women in long black dresses covering their ankles looked a lot like Chinese women.Some people are very old and weak, and some people have swollen ankles that make them tremble when they walk.There are also some young housewives who look just like Chinese.Because of the common factor of poverty, these people are familiar and easy to understand, just like you know their hearts, their history of struggle and their dignity, their life is an endless process of struggle, and All these processes are carried with their pride and respect.Misfortunes never come singly for these poor families, whether they encounter accidents, death or other disasters, or unemployment and other unfortunate things.They have a constant struggle to keep them from being swept up in the tide of life.The course of their struggles seems to have stamped their common stamp on their humanity, but here, everyone invariably conceals the misfortunes they have encountered.Mother Feng saw all this, even though it was her first formal contact with the Americans, she was no longer afraid.

In addition to these, Mother Feng also found that the church was very old and the light was very dark. The light passed through the stained glass inlaid on the windows, causing many mottled shadows in the church.It was generally quiet in the church, though some whispered.Men and women sat quietly on chairs with their heads bowed.Mother Feng felt as if she was in a Chinese temple.The altar, the candles, and the dim light from the red glass near the altar, like the ever-burning lamp in front of a Bodhisattva, as well as the statues of the gods, and the robes worn by the missionaries reminded her of everything about Buddhism.On one side in front of the altar were many candles burning in the dim light.There are many statues of saints on the niches of the church, and there is an old staircase in front of it, which is nailed up with wooden boards. It may be due to disrepair for a long time, and I am afraid of accidents when using it!Flora knelt before a statue and prayed, kneeling like a poor ordinary woman.But this Christmas, they went to the church on 112th Street, where the service was really colorful.

Tom and Eva have been in New York City for three years, and Christmas is no longer a complete stranger.During the three weeks leading up to Christmas, the holiday was talked about and felt to be approaching day by day.Whether it's schools, shops, or the streets, there is a festive atmosphere everywhere, and they also bought Christmas cards to distribute to friends. These small cards are printed with snow-covered cabins, golden rain, or reindeer pulling a sleigh. It looks beautiful.This year Flora bought Eva a bright red hat and three pairs of socks for Tom.Buy a shawl for mom, the family is full of Christmas atmosphere.On Christmas Eve, my mother went to church under Flora's persuasion.There were many carvings on the walls on both sides of the entrance of the church, and Tom was fascinated by them.The spacious and vast church makes people feel like they are in a palace.There were many people in the church, some were standing, some were walking, but it was silent.Ahead of the aisle, there was a golden altar, and choir boys in white robes sang hymns.Tom and Eva were also infected with this solemn atmosphere.

When they found their seats and sat down, Tom was fascinated by the tall columns of the church, so magnificent and majestic.In front of the altar, there is a holy platform on which a simple small house is built. There are people in the house and a donkey.Tom knew that this was a passage in the "Bible" story. The Virgin Mary held the Holy Child, and three old people in dazzling clothes went to the barn to visit the newborn Holy Child.Then the sound of the organ sounded in the church, and the sound echoed in every corner of the church.Tom felt the pores of his body opening with excitement.Then rose slowly a celestial chorus of male voices, a chorus of such calm and harmony as Tom had never heard before.The main melody is sung by male voices, while the boy's treble part is accompanied by high and low voices.When the baritone sang at full volume, the boy's treble also sang the highest pitch, while the bass sang short, lilting tones from beginning to end, and the treble seemed to sing by itself without paying attention to the bass, But in fact they are still based on the beat of the bass department.The tenor paused, then sang a lower, familiar melody, as if telling a touching story.The beat was brisk, and Tom's eyes filled with tears.After the singing, a preacher stepped onto the pulpit.The Feng family sat in the back, and Tom listened intently, grabbing the words he could understand.

Christ was a poor man.He was not born in a palace but in a stall.In a shabby hut in Bethleham, the only smells are horses, hay and horse manure.He has nothing to do with the royal power in the world.Tom was beginning to feel interested. He lived in poverty all his life, he helped the poor, the sick and the lower classes; he ate and drank with sinners; he allowed whores to anoint their feet with balm; he loved the poor because he knew them; he knew them Because he lived with them.This reverence for beauty and majesty was the most inspiring thing Tom had ever seen; second only to the spectacle of New York City skyscrapers at sunset, Tom thought. After the family left church, Tom was silent on the way home.The chorus harmonies were so touching, and the preacher's stories of Christ's poverty made Tom feel that Christ was near to him.If religion exists for men and women in poverty, there is nothing wrong with it.Tom thinks that Christianity is not a difficult religion to understand. He hopes that life itself can be so beautiful, simple and true. three As Tom and Eva got older, their walks took longer.But after Eva was seventeen years old, she seldom went for a walk. On the contrary, the older Tom was, the farther he walked.Tom wished for a companion to walk with him, and once he asked Eva to walk with him.They passed the Bronx Zoo and walked to Batanic Park. Tom, you're fucking terrible.As they walked home together, Eva said. They used to walk up the River East on Sundays.There are no highways in that area anymore, and the riverside is either a car repair shop, or a small wooden house built on the water, and a dilapidated house on the river bank.But people can still clearly see the Werfair Sandbar and Landauers Sandbar in the middle of the river from this bank.Farther away, you can see the Hell Gate Iron Bridge of the Pennsylvania Railroad across the East River.They often saw a train passing overhead, and occasionally heard the sound of a siren.There is a paved motor highway nearby, and the side of the highway is a good place for a Chinese-style stroll. There is a ferry on the East River near the 70th Street, which ferries people on the Wilfair Sandbar. There are especially many tourists on Sundays.Tom and Eva always like to come here in summer, enjoy the cool breeze blowing on the river, and watch the coal ships and tugboats coming and going on the river.The east bank was always in shadow in the afternoon, and they would sometimes pretend to be fishing with a rod in their hands, because there were no fish in the river.To the south they could see the Queens Paul Bridge, and beyond that the Williamsburg and Manhattan Bridges were out of sight. Tom sometimes walked along the river alone to the head of the Queensborough Bridge, and it was entirely with a strange eagerness in him, as he had earlier longed for the Ayr Railway.The bridge of Queens Paul Bridge, sixty feet above his head.The bridge deck is made up of a huge steel frame, under which are huge black stone pillars.These pillars are more imposing in their height and size than medieval castles, or kings' tombstones.Tom was walking and playing in the shadow of the bridge in his loose sweatshirt.Looking up at the bridge, it has the momentum of the sea, a proud and straight personality, it is simply a beautiful and strong great work of art.The towering stone pillars were at least one hundred and twenty feet high.Thousands of tons of trucks, cars, and buses coming and going on the bridge shuttle non-stop, but it is still as stable as Mount Tai, without the slightest vibration.The bridge is a product of the human mind, and no other civilization could have produced such a great structure.If it had been created a thousand years ago, it would have become the greatest wonder in the world today, bigger than the pyramids, stranger than the Leaning Tower of Pisa, and more majestic than the royal palace of the Syrian Empire. Tom pouted and watched the bridge.He appreciates it, but doesn't understand it at all.The bridge is a magical, secret part of the realm of man's knowledge, of which he knows nothing.Tom was eager to learn everything and know something.He hates that there are so many things in the world that he doesn't understand.For him, the bridge is a symbol of the power of the mechanical age and the power that pushes the wheels of modern civilization. The second day Tom arrived in the United States, he was very impressed with the electric juicer in the restaurant.Americans use machines to squeeze oranges, use machines to mix chocolate drinks, use machines to sell stamps, peanuts, Coca-Cola, use machines to shovel dirt, use machines to squeeze juice, use machines to lift goods, use machines to clear snow from the streets, at Penn Station The door is also an electric door.The machine seemed to be a ghost that could be manipulated, but Tom knew nothing about it.Will he become a scientist when he grows up?