Chapter 17 Chapter Seventeen

Cuizhi said: Shijun!Shijun raised his head and saw Cuizhi standing at the door of the room wearing a dressing gown, looking at him with astonishment, and said again: What are you doing here?Still not going to sleep at this time?Shijun said, "I'm coming."He was so numb that he almost couldn't stand up, because he clipped the letterhead in the book, closed the book, and put it back where it was.Cuizhi said: Do you know what time it is?It's almost three o'clock!Shijun said: Anyway, tomorrow is Sunday, so there is no need to get up early.Cuizhi said, "Isn't it said that tomorrow we will go out to play with Shuhui all day, and we shouldn't wake up too late."I set the alarm clock for ten o'clock.Shijun was silent.Cuizhi was a little guilty at first, and wondered if he could tell that she was too enthusiastic about Shuhui, so his attitude today was so strange.

He didn't wait for the alarm clock to wake him up, and got up twice at dawn, probably because the crab was eaten bad and he had a stomachache.When Shu Hui came to have lunch, he only came down to accompany him and drank a couple of soups.Old friends who haven't seen each other for many years, once they meet each other, because they are very familiar and familiar people, their words seem to be deep or shallow, and they are still groping for each other in secret. It is a strange mood, but it is not less It's enjoyable.The three sat there talking, and Shijun thought of Manzhen again.They seem to be three people together forever, he and Shuhui have another woman.He wondered if Shu Hui felt the same way.

After dinner, Cuizhi went to make coffee, because the servant had never used this kind of still pot.Shuhui was talking about the situation in the United States. Because of the need to employ people during the war, there were more opportunities and better treatment.Shijun said: You are really qualified now.I regret not going with you at that time.It's what you said, there's nothing to mess with here.Shu Hui said: "Wherever you are, you're not always a fool, as long as you're happy in your heart."Shijun said: If we say that our life is really boring, but to sum it up, it seems to be worth it.Apart from other things, just looking at these two children, isn't that what life is all about?Shuhui couldn't help but glanced at him, hesitant to speak.Cuizhi then came in with a cup of coffee and interrupted the conversation.

After dinner, Shuhui went out to see friends again, and went to find an old colleague. He talked about old acquaintances, and the old colleague mentioned that Manzhen had gone back to their factory to look for work, and left an address. This was last year. It was as if she had been married and divorced.Shu Hui copied down the address.That colleague happened to have something to do that day, and they made an appointment to meet another day. Shuhui came out from there, and went to find Manzhen on a whim.The place where she lived was quiet in the midst of the hustle and bustle, and it didn't look like Shanghai. There was a cobblestone alley, and there were Shikumen houses in the area, but there was a wooden gate at the bottom of the alley, and there was a big patio inside the gate.In the evening, a maid was cleaning the toilet in the courtyard, rustling and rustling.Just beside the gutter, there are several potted flowers placed high and low, including oleander and evergreen potted plants.

There are always more than one family living here, and there is another fat woman who looks like a housewife who washes clothes in the yard, and builds a wooden table against the wall to make soap on the wooden table.Shuhui smiled and said, "Excuse me, does a Miss Gu live here?"The woman looked up at him, then said to the maid: "Miss Gu hasn't come back yet?"I saw her door was still locked.Shuhui hesitated for a while, then tore off a piece of paper from the notebook, wrote his name and his brother-in-law's phone number, handed it to the woman, and said with a smile: "When she comes back, please give it to her. Then he left in a hurry.

After more than half an hour, someone called his brother-in-law's house. Their in-laws answered the phone, and she was very attentive, and then said: "He has gone to a friend's house. Their phone number is 72075. Your phone number is 72075." Call over there.Cuizhi answered the phone over there, and replied: Mr. Xu has gone out, what's your surname?Oh, your number is three︱five︱one︱seven︱four.Oh, you're welcome. Shijun was not feeling very well that day, lying upstairs.Cuizhi hung up the phone and went upstairs, and said: There is a woman surnamed Gu calling for Shuhui, who is it?Could it be your former female colleague who came to Nanjing?Shijun was stunned for a moment and said: I don't know.I thought in my heart that I just thought of Manzhen yesterday, and I got a call today, it seems that there is some kind of news.Cuizhi said: She is not married yet?Shijun said: Are you married?Cuizhi said: Then the surname is Gu?Shijun said: There are many married women who use their original surnames, and it is relatively clear to tell old colleagues this way.Cuizhi said: At that time, your mother said it was Shuhui's girlfriend, and Yipeng said it was your friend and your business!Talking and laughing.Shijun didn't make a sound.Cuizhi was silent for a while, then said: Shuhui didn't tell you about his divorce?Shijun smiled and said: How can there be a chance to say these things?Didn't spend a few minutes alone with him at all.Cuizhi said: "Okay, I hate you, when he comes later I will step aside and let you guys talk."

After a while, Shuhui came back and went upstairs to see him, but Cuizhi was not there.Shijun said: Cuizhi told you, did someone surnamed Gu call you just now.Shuhui smiled and said: "It must be Manzhen. I went looking for her just now, but I didn't meet her."Shijun said: I didn't even know she was in Shanghai.Shuhui smiled and said: You haven't seen her all these years?Shijun said: No.Shuhui said: I heard that she got married and then divorced, so it's the same as me.This was originally the best opportunity to ask him about the divorce, but Shijun had mixed feelings and didn't think about Shuhui at all.She divorced Yu Jin?how come?Why?Anyway, definitely not for him.So what if it's just for him?What else can he do now?

Seeing that he mentioned Manzhen, Shuhui seemed to be touched, so he went off to talk about something else.Cuizhi came in again and asked Shijun: Are you feeling better?Shijun said: I can't do it today, you should go out to eat with Shuhui.Shuhui said: "Isn't it the same to eat at home?"Shijun said: No, you haven't seen Shanghai in these years, you have to go out and have a look.Cuizhi said, "That's good, I didn't prepare any food tonight, I planned to go out to eat."Shuhui said: "It doesn't matter if there is no food. Let's not go out today. I also ran all afternoon. Let's rest at home."But they couldn't hold back the two of them, Cuizhi still had to discuss which restaurant to eat and whether to reserve a seat, Shijun urged her to change clothes quickly, Shuhui had to go downstairs and wait.

Cuizhi was sitting in front of the mirror combing her hair, while Shijun was lying on the bed watching her.Her hair is sometimes combed up, sometimes down, sometimes curled inwards, sometimes curled outwards, it has changed many times over the years.Today she swept her bald hair back and tied it high into a big bun, which accentuated her plump face even more.Shi Jun usually goes out with her, and he is most afraid of her dressing up before departure, he is really anxious to death, because he doesn't need to go out with her today, so he has such a leisurely mood, he can stand on the sidelines, thinking that Cuizhi really doesn't show up Old, especially today seems younger than ever, even her eyes are particularly bright, as if very excited, like a girl going on a date.She changed into a navy blue silk cheongsam with large green peonies printed on it.Shijun smiled and said: You are so beautiful today.Cuizhi was surprised to hear this, very happy, and said with a smile: Still pretty?All old.

When the two children came back from watching the movie, Er Bei stood by the dressing table and watched her make up.Da Bei said that she would never take Er Bei there again, saying that she wanted to watch and be afraid, and asked her to take her to drown when she saw the most nervous place.He usually talks very little at home, and he doesn't smile easily.Shijun thought: When a person is nine years old, what is going on in his head?Although it is not that he himself has not passed through that period, as far as he can remember, it seems that he was already very sensible at that time, and he has no similarity with the savage child in front of him.

Cuizhi left, and the children also went down to eat.At this time, let him be alone for a while, and then think about what Manzhen said just now.Thinking about it, Cuizhi suddenly bumped into the phone number that Shuhui must have tore up.At this thought, he was leaning on the bed in his dressing gown, but couldn't sit still any longer, and immediately went downstairs.There was a small notepad next to the phone, and when I looked at the top page, it was written Gu 35174 obliquely.Shuhui must have copied the number into his address book and must have already called since he was alone downstairs for half a day.Just this evening, within one or two hours, her voice appeared twice in this familiar hallway, and under the light, it seemed that her voice and smile were within easy reach.Why can't he call one too?It's an old friend. I haven't seen you in these years. It should have been.She didn't know it was his house at first, but when Shu Hui called him just now, he always told her that it would be impolite for him not to call, as if blaming her for not calling his house.The past is in the past, you can't open your mouth like a confrontation, and there is no need to mention it at all.You're not young anymore, why don't you let yourself go?Talk casually, but fortunately, Manzhen and I don't have to worry about running out of things to say.It's rare to be alone at home today, lest Cuizhi have to listen in again.He only listened to him talking to others, but he didn't like to listen to her talking to herself.But just because it was like this, because I thought it was a good opportunity, it seemed a bit shameful. While hesitating, I heard Mama Li shouting: Hey, the young master has come down!Shall we have dinner down there?I'm about to take it upstairs.The young mistress told you to heat up the soup, and there are two other dishes for porridge.The two children shouted: "I also eat porridge!"Dad is coming to eat!Shijun copied down the number, then went in to eat with them at a table, and listened to them talk to him about today's movie.After dinner he sat downstairs and read the evening paper.It's better now, but I regret that I didn't go out with Shuhui just now.Probably because I didn't call Manzhen, I felt very lonely and hoped that they would come back soon.This time when Shuhui came, he never talked freely, but today we can talk about late at night.The children had all gone to bed, but it was almost ten o'clock when they looked at the clock. They must have eaten and then went to sit somewhere else.Two days ago, Cuizhi mentioned which nightclub had a good performance. After waiting and waiting but still not coming, Li's mother reported that the young lady had come.Now that Xiaojian is going to university in Shanghai, the young lady is worried that he is alone in Shanghai, so she also moves here. However, because of her discord with Cuizhi, she rarely interacts with Shijun.Ever since Xiao Jian was bitten by a dog that time, the young mistress became even more angry. But when Shijun heard that his sister-in-law had come, he guessed her reason for coming, or it was because of Xiaojian.Xiao Jian, it is said that he is not very motivated. He is a mess in school and wanders outside all day.Of course, it's also to blame for the young lady's over-doting and unknown, resulting in his character.He was the one who came to Shijun to borrow money before, and he was dressed like a hooligan.His mother probably didn't know about the loan, but she may have discovered it now. She came tonight to pay back the money.But Shijun didn't guess.The young lady was eating in a restaurant because there was a treat today, and she happened to run into Cuizhi.The treats were in the upstairs room, while Cuizhi and Shuhui were downstairs in the train seats.The young mistress walked past them and saw Cuizhi wiping her tears.The eldest mistress knew Shuhui, but Shuhui didn't know her anymore, because after all these years, she had grown old, and now she had completely changed into an old lady's attire.Cuizhi didn't see her either, she probably focused all her attention on Shu Hui, but they didn't speak.The young mistress didn't even greet them, and went upstairs to the banquet.Come downstairs after dinner, they are no longer there.When the eldest young mistress went back, the more she thought about it, the more she felt something was wrong, so she rushed to Shijun's place overnight to check on the situation.She felt that this matter was of great importance, and she couldn't hide it just because she was Cuizhi's natal family, so she thought she had a sense of righteousness and killing relatives, rather than taking pleasure in others' misfortunes.When I asked Cuizhi if she hadn't come back yet, she knew better, because she smiled and said, "Why did you leave you alone at home?"Shijun told her that she felt a little unwell and had diarrhea, so she didn't go. The uncle and sister-in-law greet each other and talk about Xiaojian.Hearing her tone, Shijun seemed to be unaware of Xiaojian's ridiculous behavior outside, he thought he should tell her, otherwise, speaking of it, he was right, why would he lend money to Xiaojian secretly.But it's not easy to say this to her. If one is bad, it's like asking her for a debt.Moreover, the eldest young mistress has always defended her shortcomings. The Xiaojian in her mouth is always an outstanding and good young man. When others say that he is not good, it is impossible to say this.Seeing Shijun hesitating a few times without explaining why, the eldest young lady wondered more and more that he had some hidden secrets that were difficult to express.She is the cousin of Cuizhi's natal family, and he must count her crimes in front of her natal family.The eldest young mistress said, "Do you have anything to say?"Just tell me it doesn't matter.Shijun smiled and said: "No, it's nothing." Before he continued, the young mistress went on and said: "It's because of Cuizhi, right?"Cuizhi is also bad, too disregarding your face, eating out with a man, shedding tears, otherwise I won’t talk about it anymore, Cuizhi’s appearance is really wrong, it’s okay for me to see it, for others What is it to see?Shijun couldn't figure it out for a while, and said after a while, "What do you mean today?"She went out with Shuhui today.The eldest young lady said lightly: "Yes, I know him. Didn't you often come to Nanjing and live in our house in the past?"He doesn't know me anymore.Shijun said: He just returned to China, he just arrived yesterday.Originally, we had made an appointment to go out together, but it happened that I was not feeling well today, so Cuizhi had to accompany him.The eldest grandma said: "It doesn't matter if you go out to play, shed tears at others, which one counts?"Shijun said: You must have misunderstood, sister-in-law, there will be no such thing.Shuhui is my best friend. Although Cuizhi has a bit of a stubborn temper, if there is anything else, she won't do it!Talking and laughing.The young lady said: That's great!As long as you believe her! Shijun saw that she was quite angry, and he wanted to tell her about Xiaojian messing around outside.Of course it is inconvenient to speak now.She just said bad things about Cui Zhi, and he said bad things about Xiao Jian, which turned out to be a counterattack. Wouldn't she be even more angry when she heard it?So he didn't mention it, and found something else to chat with her.The eldest young mistress was still angry and left without sitting for a while.After she left, Shijun sighed, thinking that someone like her who fears the world will not be chaotic is really not normal.She was also widowed because of her youth, and she was also a victim of the old ethics. After eleven o'clock, Cuizhi came back alone.Shijun said, "Where's Shuhui?"Cuizhi said: He went home and said he had agreed with their old lady.Shijun was very disappointed, and asked that they were there to watch a dance, so he went to several places to sit.When Cuizhi heard that he had been waiting for them downstairs, she also felt uncomfortable, so she said: You should go and lie down.Shijun said: I'm fine, I can go out as usual tomorrow.Cuizhi said: Then you have to get up early tomorrow, so you should rest more.Shijun said: I slept all day today, and I feel so bored when I lie down all the time.She heard that the eldest young mistress had come and asked what was the matter?Shijun didn't tell her that their rift was already deep enough.It was a joke to say she was crying, but she would only be angry when she heard it.Instead of tears, she didn't look unhappy. She urged him upstairs to lie down, and she was very considerate, because he said he was bored, so she brought him a book from the booth to read.She came into the room with a cup of tea and threw the book on his bed.As soon as he threw it, a piece of letter paper in the book fell to the ground.Shijun saw it at a glance, and hurriedly stepped on the slippers and got out of bed to pick them up, but Cuizhi was so considerate that she had already bent down to pick them up for him, holding them in her hand and looking at them casually.Shijun said: "You bring it to me, there is nothing to see."As he spoke, he stretched out his hand to grab it.Cuizhi refused to let go, and while watching, a surprised expression gradually appeared on her face, and she said with a smile: Yo!It's still a love letter!How is this going?Who wrote it to you?Shijun said: This was quite a few years ago.Bring it to me! Cuizhi raised her head high, and said word by word: You left in such a hurry this time, you must have not brought your winter clothes with you?I think you are always so careless about these things, and you don't think of adding clothes when it's cold.I don't know why I always think about these things. She couldn't help but giggle when she read this.Shijun said: You pay me back.She squeezed her throat again, and read in a high-pitched voice imitating the popular drama: Whatever I saw or heard someone say, it was completely irrelevant, my mind would turn a few turns immediately, and immediately You think.She said with a smile to Shijun: Oh, I don't see that you still have such a great ability to fascinate people like this, ah!Then read on: Yesterday I went to Shuhui's house, and I knew he wouldn't be home, I just wanted to see his parents, because you have been living with them all the time. With a groan, Xiang Shijun said: I know, it was your Miss Gu who came to Nanjing wearing a ragged sheepskin coat.I also said it was Shuhui's girlfriend, but I didn't believe it.Shijun said: Why?Not pretty enough?Not trendy enough?Cuizhi smiled and said: Yo!Insulted your sweetheart?Look how angry you are!She said in a delicate voice in a drama accent again: Shijun!I want you to know that there is a person in this world who is always waiting for you, no matter when, no matter where, anyway, you know, there is always such a person.Well, is she still there waiting for you? Shijun couldn't bear it any longer, he came to grab her, and said harshly: "Give it to me!"Cuizhi refused to give it to him, the two struggled, and Shijun almost beat her.Cuizhi suddenly yelled "Ouch", she pulled her hand back, blushed angrily and said: "Okay, you can take it!"Who wants to read your disgusting letter!While talking, he walked out with his chest upright. Shijun grabbed the crumpled letter paper in his hand, rolled it tighter, and stuffed it into his pocket.He is still fighting with anger.He put on his clothes and came downstairs.Cuizhi was downstairs, sitting on the sofa and weaving a leather bag out of a kind of big white beads. Seeing him walking out, she said calmly, "Huh, are you still going out at this time?"Where are you going?Hearing that voice, he didn't plan to quarrel any more, but Shijun still walked out without saying a word. After exiting the gate, the street in front of the gate was dark and gloomy, with two roads crossing, electric lights and neon lights gradually increased.Shijun walked into a pharmacy to make a phone call. He didn't know Manzhen's address, but only had a phone number.When I called, a man came to answer the phone, and when he heard that he was looking for Miss Gu, he said, "Wait a minute."I waited for a long time.Shijun guessed that Manzhen's house didn't have a phone, so he borrowed the phone from the neighbor, the place was noisy, or maybe it was a store, and he heard the cry of a child.He suddenly thought of the two children in his family, and the desperate determination just now was shaken again.Knowing that there will be no results, why bother?Wouldn't it be more sorry for her to involve her in his family disputes for no reason at this time?The horn of the car over there can be heard on the phone, and the two hazy and distant sounds sound like a dream. He regretted making the call and wanted to hang up, but suddenly a woman's voice spoke over there.What I said was hello, go and shout, wait a minute!He wanted to tell them not to shout, but of course it was too late.He quietly hung up the phone, so he had to ask Manzhenbai to come over. He came out of the pharmacy and walked down the street.It was nearly midnight and the sidewalk was deserted.He probably felt a little vacant because he had been lying down all day today, and he felt tired after walking too much, but he didn't want to go home for a while.Manzhenbai shouldn't have been allowed to take that trip just now, so let him pay her back now.The new autumn wind blows on his face, and he feels the coolness, which he hasn't seen for a long time, like a blind man's fingers touching his face, wondering if he has changed or how old he is.It never occurred to him that she would change, too. When he came out just now, Li's mother at home paid attention. Originally, Li's mother waited for Cuizhi first, and when Cuizhi came back, she had already gone to sleep. He heard the high-heeled Gordon Gordon running downstairs again, obviously there was a quarrel.How could Li's mother miss it, because she was looking for something urgent to do at the door of the kitchen, and then she saw Shijun coming downstairs in full clothes, as if she was about to go out, she felt even more strange.He didn't dress properly all day today, where would he change his clothes at this time?When Cuizhi asked him where he was going again, he ignored him, which had never happened before.Li's mother is clear in her heart, it's not because Li's mother has heard all the words that the young lady came here today.Although Mama Li is a bit old-fashioned in doing things, her ability to listen to the wall is not inferior to anyone else.The eldest mistress said that the young mistress was good to Mr. Xu, although the young master didn't believe it, he still defended the young mistress, maybe he wanted to save face, and he had to do this at the time, so when the guests left and the young mistress came back, he would find another way to piss on her. There are things too.Mama Li couldn't help it, so she went to find out what Cuizhi was saying. As expected, Cuizhi didn't know anything, only that the young lady was here today.Li Ma then told the whole story of the young mistress and told her everything. When Shijun came back, Cuizhi had already gone to bed, sitting on the bed weaving a beaded purse with a very cold face.As he untied his tie, he said slowly: You don't have to think about it, there is no third party among us.And it was so many years ago.Cuizhi immediately asked very hostilely: What did you say?What third party?What does this mean?Shijun was silent for a while, then Fang said: I mean that letter.Cuizhi glanced at him, smiled and said: Oh, that letter!I had long since forgotten about that.Listening to her tone, she seems to think that he is too boring. A love letter from more than ten years ago is still regarded as a great thing, and she keeps talking about it.Shijun just said, that would be great. He wanted to ask Shu Hui tomorrow if he had the chance to go to the United States for further studies.After wasting these years, of course it is not what it used to be.Whether or not Shuhui returns to the United States depends on the situation. He is planning to go to the north first, and he can be asked to take care of him when he arrives in the north. If he can find a job in the north or change the environment, he can be separated from Cuizhi for a while. , but this level is not going to tell Shuhui for the time being.Unfortunately, Shuhui didn't come or call for several days.Shijun gradually became a little suspicious, could it be that Cuizhi offended him that day.These two days have been awkward, and I don't even want to ask her this question.In the end, I made a phone call by myself, and Shu Hui was very busy. The reason for being so busy was that he changed his mind. He was leaving for the north within a few days.I didn't have time to talk too much in a hurry, so I made an appointment to have dinner on Friday. That afternoon, Shijun thought again, since it was inconvenient to speak in front of Cuizhi, he might as well go to Shuhui's place earlier, invite him to go out for a while, and then come back with him.Called but failed, he was rarely at home, so I had to go directly from the office to check with him.His brother-in-law's house is a small alley house behind the racetrack, with convenient transportation, and the house is quite old. The small yard is full of green creepers, reflecting a blue-green new bamboo curtain in front of the window, which is very vivid.After the drizzle, the cement was wet. There was a woman squatting here at the back door fanning the stove, and the tongue of fire could be seen.Shijun looked at the house number and counted it, and asked the kitchen door of the family: Is Mr. Xu at home?The maid under the stove yelled: Young Mistress!Find uncle and master! Shuhui's younger sister came with the child in her arms, walked in with a smile, walked a long way in front of him, stopped at the door of a wing room, and called in softly: Mom, Mr. Shen is here.Seeing that her expression was a bit ghostly, he just remembered that her smile just now was a little floating, as if her mind was restless, and she must have come at the wrong time today, because she said: "If Shuhui is not at home, I will come to see my aunt in the next day."Inside, Mrs. Xu had already stood up and greeted her with a smile.Her daughter let Shijun to the door of the room, and saw a female guest inside at a glance. This kind of wing room is very narrow and long, the light is extremely dark, and before it is time to turn on the lights, she heard the boom before she could tell it was Manzhen. There was a sound, it was the blood surge in another body a few feet away, as if a sound wave rushed to the person, and I don't know if it was his own instinctive excitement.But the eyes of the people in the room are used to the darkness, unlike when he just came in from the outside, she probably saw him first, and then heard that Mr. Shen was coming. Their place is still an old Chinese threshold, more than half a foot high. When you lift it up and step in, one foot first and the other behind, it is quite heavy. I didn't hear what Mrs. Xu said, but I heard Manzhen say with a smile: Hey, Shijun also coming!The tone of voice is strangely light.Everyone's voice is very high-pitched, but the voice is not loud, like the crisp laughter in the distance, lingering in the ear, I don't know what to say, and it takes a while to understand after I say it.Mrs. Xu was saying: I have come today, but Shu Hui has gone out again.Manzhen said: "It's my fault. I made an appointment at four o'clock. It happened to be busy today, so I didn't come until then. He couldn't wait and left first." Mrs. Xu's attitude was very natural, but she talked more than usual, and she was busy filling the gap before the silence subsided.First explain why Shuhui has been so busy, and then talk about Shuhui's younger sister, who was only a little old when Shijun helped her with arithmetic, and now she has a child.He also asked Manzhen when he saw her.After all the calculations, don't ask how many years it has been since she and Shijun have seen each other.Mrs. Xu must have known about Shuhui's dinner at his house today, but she never mentioned it.Shijun's house is of course the most taboo.Because of talking about Yufang again.After talking for a while, Manzhen said that he was going to leave, and Shijun said: I have to go too, and I will come to see my aunt another day.At the back door, Shuhui's younger sister rushed out to see her off.She knew they were a pair of lovers when she was a girl, and now she saw them both go away. How many times has he thought about the scene of the reunion, and when it really happened, it was completely different from what he imagined. Far, like looking upside down through a telescope.To his surprise it was still light outside.She is much more haggard, but fortunately, her slightly square face will not lose its shape even if she is thinner.Fortunately, she is not exactly the same as before, or else she must have met in a dream, not real.Manzhen smiled and said: How many years has it really been gone?Shijun said: I didn't even know you were in Shanghai.Manzhen said: I also thought you were in Nanjing.All the words that were said were swallowed by the strange silence around them, and the two fell silent. Walking all the way, he had already reached the street. He didn't ask her where she was going, but he didn't ask her to have dinner either.Two people sitting in one car and three cars seemed too eye-catching, no matter what she was afraid of interrupting the mood, she would say that she was going back.So I walked like this, walking, but saw a neon sign in front of me, it was a restaurant.Shijun conveniently said, "Let's have dinner together, we'll talk for a while."Manzhen really smiled and said: I have to go back, I still have something to do.You spend the day with Shu Hui to play.Shijun said: "Go in and sit for a while, don't necessarily have to eat."She didn't say anything.There is still a long way to go, and when we get there, we will go in together.The place inside is not big, and it is noisy, it is the time to sit down.When Shijun saw him, he suddenly remembered that Shuhui must have come to eat at his house.I found a seat on the train and sat down. After ordering food, I said, "I'll just make a phone call."He added with a smile, don't go, I can see it.The phone was installed at the back of the store, otherwise he was really worried and would rather not call.He dialed the number, looked at Manzhen from a distance under the dim light, and heard Cuizhi's voice, it seemed like a world away.Looking out of the window, I could only see a vast expanse of road, and the sound of rustling cars came and went more frequently.The large glass window is filled with neon blue lotus-colored light tubes, and the characters on the back cannot be seen, and I don’t even know which country’s characters it is, and I don’t know where I am. He said in his mouth: "Is Shuhui here?"I can't come back to eat, you eat first, you leave him to sit for a while, I will come back after eating.He had never done such a thing of demolition. He invited someone to come, but he didn't come back temporarily.He could explain it to Shuhui in another day, but he predicted that Cuizhi would explode when he heard it.He wasn't going to argue with her, so he hung up on it, lest Manzhen overhear.She didn't say anything, and she didn't ask him where he was or what he was doing there, as if she had a premonition. Shijun hung up the phone and saw a room separated by a wooden wall, so he walked over and said to Manzhen, let's go in and sit, it's too messy outside.The waiter nearby heard it, and moved the teapots, teacups, bowls and chopsticks in for them, and lowered the white cloth curtain.Manzhen went in and took a look, and there was a round table inside, which was full of pits and valleys, and there was a coat rack in the corner of the room.Manzhen took off his coat and hung it up.There used to be a time when he would take her home from the factory every day, and her family knew people well, so they wouldn't come into the room, and he would kiss her as soon as she took off her coat.What now?She also remembered?She will not forget.He wanted to say something casually, but he missed it, but he couldn't remember anything.I wanted her to say something, but she didn't say anything.The two just stood there, looking at each other.Maybe she wanted him to kiss her too.But what about a kiss?A few days ago, after much deliberation, I still didn't go to find her, isn't it still the same situation now?The so-called hard facts are like iron cases.There was a sting in his eyes, there were tears, and a blockage in his throat.He stared at her involuntarily.Her lips were trembling. Manzhen said: Shijun.Her voice was shaking too.Shijun didn't make a sound, waiting for her to continue, but he couldn't speak because he was choked up.Manzhen said after a long while: Shijun, we can't go back.He knew it was the truth, and he was still shocked when he heard it.Her head was already on his shoulders.He holds her. She finally stepped back, looked at him nicely, kissed his face for a while, kissed the warmth under his ears, then stepped back and looked at him, and said for a while: Shijun, are you happy? ?Shijun thought: What is happiness?It depends on how to explain.She shouldn't have asked.And you can't talk so-so like you would to ordinary friends.Why can't I tell her that I am full of bitterness?A gentleman who can't mention another woman's faults?Is it masculinity and refuses to admit it?Or to protect the shortcomings, to protect Cuizhi?Maybe love is not enthusiasm, nor nostalgia, but the years, and the years have become a part of life.Thinking this way, I was silent for a while, and if I didn't speak again, this silence would become a kind of reply, because I only want you to be happy. As soon as the words came out of his mouth, he immediately felt that he had made a mistake, which was equivalent to answering with silence just now.He hugged her tighter in desperation, and she became more attached to him, stroking his face with one hand.He took her hand down and kissed it, and suddenly saw a deep scar on her hand, which was unprecedented, and asked with a smile: Hey, what's wrong with you?He didn't understand why her face suddenly turned cold, and she didn't answer right away. She lowered her head to look at her hand.It was glass scratched.It was at Zhu's house that day, she yelled loudly and no one answered, she was so anxious that she smashed the glass window, so she cut her hand.At that time, I kept thinking about seeing Shijun one day, how to tell him, and told him in my dreams many times.To achieve such a dream, I wake up crying every time.Now I really told him there, in the most flat tone, because it was so many years ago. At this time, because he was afraid that the waiter would come in, he had already sat down.The more Shijun listened, the more strange he became, there was no expression on his face, only very pale.When something like this happened, he was stunned.The most irritating thing is that I am completely powerless, even if I am smashed to pieces, I can't rush in, and I can't rescue her.Manzhen never looked at him, as if seeing him made her unable to speak.When it came to escaping from Zhu's house, she ended up marrying Hongcai, she talked faster and faster.Then we talked about divorce. After countless twists and turns, the child was finally awarded to her for custody.She borrowed a lot of debts to fight the lawsuit. Shijun said: Then how are you doing now?Is there enough money?Manzhen said: "It's all right now, the debt has been paid off."Shijun said: Where is this person now?Manzhen said: Why are you still mentioning him?Things have passed.Later, it was also my fault, why I was so confused, I really regret it, and I hate it when I think of what happened at that time.Of course she was referring to marrying Hongcai.Shijun knew that she must have heard the news of his marriage at that time, so he thought of giving up on himself, because he said: I think your time was also because I really discouraged you.Manzhen suddenly turned her head away.She must have burst into tears. Shijun had nothing to say for a moment, and after a while Fang whispered: I went to find your sister at that time, and she returned your ring to me and told me that you and Yujin were married.Manzhen was taken aback, and said: Oh, she said that?Shijun then told her about him. At first her mother said that she was recuperating at Zhujia, and when he went to see her, they said she was not there, so he thought she hadn't seen him.After returning to Nanjing, I wrote to her, but there was no response. When I went to find her later, the whole family had already left Shanghai.Looking for her sister again, I heard the news of her marriage.At that time, she really didn't expect her own sister to be like this, and just happened to hear from other sources that Yu Jin had recently come to Shanghai to get married.Manzhen said: He got married at that time.Shijun said: Where is he now?Manzhen said: In the Mainland.During the Anti-Japanese War, he was arrested by the Japanese in the countryside, and his wife died at the hands of the Japanese.He was finally released and went to Chongqing.世鈞慘然了一會，因道：他還好？有信沒有？曼楨道：也是前兩年，有個親戚在貴陽碰見他，才有信來，還幫我想法子還債。 憑豫瑾對她的情分，幫助她還債本來是理所當然的。世鈞頓了頓，結果還是忍不住，彷彿順口問了聲：他有沒有再結婚？曼楨道：沒有吧？因向他笑了笑，道：我們都是寂寞慣了的人。世鈞頓時慚愧起來，彷彿有豫瑾在那裏，他就可以卸責似的。他其實是恨不得破壞一切，來補償曼楨的遭遇。他在桌子上握著她的手，默然片刻，方微笑道：好在現在見著你了，別的什麼都好辦。我下了決心了，沒有不可挽回的事。你讓我去想辦法。曼楨不等他說完，已經像受不了痛苦似的，低聲叫道：你別說這話行不行？今天能見這一面，已經是心裏不知多痛快！說著已是兩行眼淚直流下來，低下頭去抬起手背揩拭。 她一直知道的。是她說的，他們回不去了。他現在才明白為什麼今天老是那麼迷惘，他是跟時間在掙扎。從前最後一次見面，至少是突如其來的，沒有訣別。今天從這裏走出去，是永別了，清清楚楚，就跟死了的一樣。 他們這壁廂生離死別，那頭他家裏也正難捨難分，自從翠芝掛上了電話，去告訴叔惠說世鈞不回來吃飯，房間裏的空氣就透著幾分不自然。翠芝見沒甚話說，便出去吩咐開飯。兩個孩子已經吃過了。偏那李媽一留神，也不進來伺候添飯，連陶媽也影蹤全無，老媽子們再笨些，有些事是不消囑咐的。叔惠是在別處吃得半醉了來的，也許是出於自衛，怕跟他們夫婦倆吃這頓飯。現在就只剩下一個翠芝，也只有更僵。 在飯桌上，兩人都找了些閒話來講，但是老感到沒話說。翠芝在一度沉默之後，便淡淡的說道：我知道，你怕我又跟你說那些話。他本來是跟她生氣，那天出去吃飯，她那樣盡情發洩。她當然也知道事到如今，他們之間唯一的可能是發生關係。以他跟世鈞的交情，這又是辦不到的，所以她彷彿有恃無恐似的。女人向來是這樣，就光喜歡說。男人是不大要談戀愛的，除了年紀實在輕的時候。 他生氣，也是因為那誘惑太強了。幾天不見，又想回來了，覺得對她不起。他微醺地望著她，忽然站起來走過來，憐惜地微笑著摸了摸她的頭髮。翠芝坐著一動也不動，臉上沒有表情，眼睛向前望著，也不朝他看，但是仍舊淒然，而又很柔馴的神氣。叔惠只管順著她頭髮撫摸著，含笑望著她半晌，忽道：其實儀娃跟你的脾氣有點像，不過她差遠了，也不知道我自己的年紀關係，心境不同了。便講起他的結婚經過。其實他當時的心理說來可笑當然他也不會說多少有點賭氣。翠芝的母親從前對他那樣，雖然不過匆匆一面，而且事隔多年，又遠隔重洋，明知石太太也不會聽見，畢竟出了口氣。他不說，翠芝也可以想像比她闊，比她出風頭的小姐。 儀娃怕生孩子，老是怕會有，就為這個不知道鬧過多少回。他雖然收入不錯，在美國生活程度高，當然不夠她用的。她自己的錢不讓她花，是逼著她吃苦。用她的錢，日子久了又不免叫她看不起，至少下意識地。吵架是都為了節育，她在這件事上太神經質，結果他煩不勝煩，賭氣不理她了，又被她抓住了錯處，鬧著要離婚。離就離他不答應，難道是要她出贍養費？ 所謂抓住了錯處，當然是有別的女人。他沒提。本來在戰時美國，這太普遍了。他結婚很晚，以前當然也有過艷遇，不過生平也還是對翠芝最有知己之感，也憧憬得最久。這時候燈下相對，晚風吹著米黃色厚呢窗簾，像個女人的裙子在風中鼓蕩著，亭亭地，姍姍地，像要進來又沒進來。窗外的夜色漆黑。那幅長裙老在半空中徘徊著，彷彿隨時就要走了，而過門不入，兩人看著都若有所失，有此生虛度之感。 翠芝忽然微笑道：我想你不久就會再結婚的。叔惠笑道：哦？翠芝笑道：你將來的太太一定年輕、漂亮叔惠聽她語氣未盡，便替她續下去道：有錢。Both of them laughed.叔惠笑道：你覺得這是個惡性循環，是不是？因又解釋道：我是說，我給你害的，彷彿這輩子只好吃這碗飯了，除非真是老得沒人要。在一片笑聲中，翠芝卻感到一絲淒涼的勝利與滿足。 (End of the book)