Chapter 2 The first technique: speaking is an important tool for interpersonal communication

Speaking is a human instinct.From the time babies are born and start babbling, speaking has become an important tool for interpersonal communication.Only through continuous communication and continuous exercise of eloquence can a person gradually develop the ability to think quickly and articulately, so that he can accurately express his thoughts, feelings and appeals. Although a person cannot fully express himself, he can reveal himself through words, reveal his character and mentality unconsciously or intentionally or unintentionally, and outline his outline or image. People who can't speak often speak very bluntly, dullly, and superficially, and cannot produce any moving power.The person who can talk can change the blunt, rigid, and superficial expressions, and use simple and specific language to shock the hearts of the audience, generate infinite charm, and make the other party fall for it. , career can be successful.

Here are a few examples from ancient and modern China and abroad to prove the importance of proper conversation: At the beginning of July 1987, when U.S. President Clinton visited the mainland, he announced the three-no policy. Taiwan Governor James Soong often spoke in the Kuomintang, quoting Zhuge Liang's poems to demand that the ruling party make a solemn statement of our position. Su Zhicheng, Director of the Office of the Presidential Office Secretary, learned of this, and asked Governor Song not to learn from the figures of the Three Kingdoms, but to take Liu Bowen as a teacher, not to be in his position, and not to plan his own affairs. Liu Bowen retired after success.

People from the provincial government immediately put forward the following rebuttals, and the elaboration of their arguments made it difficult for the other party to respond. 1. Because Liu Bowen, the military adviser, performed too well back then, he was afraid of causing the death of Ming Taizu Zhu Yuanzhang, so he retired immediately after the incident to protect his body.Interpreting Director Su's words, does the boss want to kill him? 2. If the boss does not have this intention, is Director Su's general history of China not well read? 3. Governor Song is speaking as a member of the Standing Committee of the Central Committee of the Communist Party of China. How can he be called an outsider?

At the same time as before, legislator Shen Fuxiong blurted out his dissatisfaction when he thought that the host Hu Wanling had repeatedly quoted the views of the Washington Post as the basis for the program's talk during the first talk show on FTV: A mere editorial is not enough to influence. You have been in the media for a long time and think that the media is great. In our country where there is no rule of law, the concept of the rule of law will be relatively weak. When Hu Wanling asked Shen Fuxiong to apologize publicly, she was ridiculed by the other party: No sense of humor, too tender skin, not qualified to be a host.

No matter how the above-mentioned misfired conversation ended, it must not be able to make the other party feel relieved. In the early stage of the American Civil War, the northern army attacked the south, but failed many times.The arrogance of the southern army became arrogant, clamoring to restore slavery throughout the country.The fighting spirit of the Northern army was frustrated, and there was a wavering inside. The soldiers doubted whether they could defeat the South and overthrow slavery.At that time, as the leader of the army, General Lincoln was very good at words. He used very specific and vivid language to speak to all the soldiers.He said:

Our war today is related to the freedom and happiness of the masses.Slavery is like a yoke around our necks, and we must fight valiantly to break it.Liberty belongs to all Americans.As long as you soldiers who fought bravely to smash the shackles join us and face our temporary setbacks with indomitable and fearless spirit, I firmly believe that the God of victory is smiling at us not far away. Lincoln used the shackles as a metaphor for slavery that imprisoned freedom, and the smile of God as a metaphor for victory. His words were sonorous and full of charm, thus arousing the soldiers' fighting courage.

Lincoln's ability to speak kind words was not born like this, but was continuously tempered in the practice of social life.Some people think they can speak a few words, so they show off their tricks and are aggressive, making people avoid them. Once, one of Lao Tzu's students showed off his eloquence to Lao Tzu. He asked Lao Tzu, what is the secret to living in troubled times? Lao Tzu pretended not to hear, but chatted with him about stomatology. Lao Tzu asked students: Do people have teeth first or tongues first? Student Answer: Of course, there is the tongue first, and then the teeth.

At this time, Lao Tzu opened his mouth and asked the students: Do you see my tongue? Student Answer: Yes. Lao Tzu asked again: So, what about my teeth? The student was puzzled, and stammered, "Mr.'s teeth have all fallen out." So, Lao Tzu took advantage of the topic and said: The teeth fall out first because they are too showy, but what about the tongue?Only by hiding it deeply can it be kept for a long time! The student suddenly realized that Lao Tzu was teaching him: speaking is a very profound knowledge, and learning to speak should be practiced persistently, and one should never just want to show off or show off one's cleverness just because one can speak a few words.

These words of Lao Tzu are very beneficial for us to learn to speak.With the development of the commercial society, the market competition is becoming increasingly fierce. How to control business opportunities and survive in troubled times really requires some skills in speaking and philosophies in dealing with the world.