Chapter 10 The first and fourth skills: how to borrow other people's words

People often speak in their own words, but consciously or unconsciously, many people like to borrow what others say to justify their own opinions or opinions.Especially in the aspect of borrowing famous quotes and aphorisms from famous people, it further improves the authority of one's own speech.Sometimes, as long as it is said by a famous person or an authoritative person, even a very ordinary sentence will appear to be significant and unique.This effect of using the light of celebrities to improve the authority of personal speech is called the backlight effect. Carnegie gave an example of a dialogue about the good use of borrowed words:

Well, the most important thing for sushi is to have a chewy texture. Look, how colorful this piece is! no no!It seems too superficial for you to say that. Didn’t Ji Guanzhi say it in his "Tosa Diary"?Making sushi is one way to preserve fish, so if you only praise the rice for its chewiness, wouldn't the cart be putting the cart before the horse? Oh, is that so? As for the chewiness, Mr. Nichio Ryukuni also said that rice is our main staple food. If it needs to be better, it can only be whiter at most, so snow-white rice is a symbol of luxury. That's it!You are so good, every time I am in admiration.

This passage does show someone's knowledge, but it gives people a taste of pretentiousness.Apparently, someone is an authoritarian. He always quotes classics and references authority in very small matters, and he deeply reveals his longing for authority in the words and phrases that frequently quote famous people. Especially in Japan, the wind of worship is very strong, especially the worship of European and American countries. Because Japan's national power has been greatly reduced after the war, and foreign words are flooding everywhere, it is necessary to use the prestige of foreigners to expand its performance.Therefore, from a psychological point of view, this hello effect is also a special backlight effect, but the object of borrowing light is a foreigner.

Except for celebrities and foreigners, people have regarded their parents and teachers as authorities since they were young, and they often borrow what their father said or what a certain teacher said to improve their authority. Historically, Kong Ming used Cao Zhi's "Tongque Terrace Ode" to anger Zhou Yu, inciting a story of fighting in Chibi and burning Cao Ying, which is also very interesting. It was the thirteenth year of Emperor Xian of the Han Dynasty (AD 201), when Cao Cao led an army to attack Jiangnan.In order to avoid disaster, Liu Bei sent Kong Ming to Soochow to lobby, trying to persuade Sun Quan to unite against Cao.Kong Ming knew that Zhou Yu was a figure in Soochow who held the power of soldiers and horses, so if he wanted to persuade Sun Quan, he must first persuade Zhou Yu.But Kong Ming was not familiar with Zhou Yu's personality and behavior, nor did he know Zhou Yu's attitude towards resisting Cao Jun, so he decided to find out Zhou Yu's background through Lu Su, an important minister of the Eastern Wu Dynasty.

On this day, Kong Ming, accompanied by Lu Su, went to meet Zhou Yu, and Lu Su reported to Zhou Yu the situation of Cao Jun's southward attack.Unexpectedly, after hearing this, Zhou Yu only smiled and said: Then surrender to Cao Cao. It turned out that Zhou Yu was not an idle person. He said this because he wanted to observe Kong Ming's reaction and find out the intention of Kong Ming's visit. Kong Ming is a smart person, he can see through Zhou Yu's inner world at a glance, nodded deliberately and said with a smile: What the General said was true.but Kong Ming changed the subject, and continued:

Wu Guo has a way to surrender without any loss, and that is to dedicate the two beauties, Da Qiao and Xiao Qiao, to Cao Cao. Cao Cao would be happy to withdraw his troops! After finishing speaking, Kong Ming recited "Tongque Terrace Ode" aloud: From the Ming Dynasty onwards, I used to play and play, and climbed to the stage for entertainment; I saw the vastness of the Taifu, and I saw the camp of the holy virtue; After the recitation, Kong Ming continued: This "Tongque Terrace Fu" was written by Cao Zhi.It means that Cao Cao built the luxurious Tongque Terrace on the bank of the Zhang River, which is extremely beautiful in the garden, and is intended to hide the famous flowers in the east of the Tibetan River, Da Qiao and Xiao Qiaoer.Now that Cao Cao's army is suppressing the situation, he actually wants to get the two beauties, Da Qiao and Xiao Qiao.As far as Wu Guo is concerned, sacrificing these two women is nothing more than falling two leaves from a big tree.Therefore, it is better for the general to send Da Qiao and Xiao Qiao to Cao Ying to avoid disaster.

Zhou Yu was furious when he heard Kong Ming borrow Cao Zhi's poem and a passionate explanation, threw the wine glass to the ground and cursed sharply: Cao Cao's old thief is too deceitful! It turned out that Da Qiao was Sun Ce's widow and Xiao Qiao was Zhou Yu's wife.No wonder Zhou Yu was furious. Kong Ming's excuse deeply hurt Zhou Yu.The next morning, Zhou Yu asked Sun Quan to fight.Thus appeared the Battle of Chibi, which has been passed down through the ages. As Carnegie said: People who love to borrow famous sayings and aphorisms are mostly authoritarians, who use authority to improve the persuasiveness of their speech.

Of course, from a negative point of view, people who use too many borrowed words often also show their lack of self-confidence, and lack of independent opinion on a certain issue, so they have to use famous quotes to dress themselves up.