Chapter 15 The Ninth Skill: Questioning Skills in Interrogation

People have certain skills in how to ask questions tactfully (including questioning, rhetorical questioning, questioning) in conversation.Ask questions skillfully, get the information you need, and take advantage of speaking. How to ask clever questions? In a church in a certain country, one day, when a priest was worshiping, he suddenly had a cigarette craving, and asked his superior: Can I smoke while praying?As a result, he was rejected and scolded by his superiors.Later, another priest also became addicted to smoking while praying, but he asked his superior in another way: Can I pray while smoking?The boss actually smiled and agreed to his request.

It can be seen that one must master certain skills and methods in questioning in order to achieve one's own goals. Clever questions generally take the following forms: ·Restricted questions This kind of question has a strong purpose, and it can help the questioner to obtain an ideal answer, and reduce the chance of being rejected by the questioner or the answer that the questioner is unwilling to accept.Restricted questions have a specific scope, and the other party can also choose words and answers calmly, so that the questioner can get closer to the purpose of the question. It is said that in tea drinking rooms in Hong Kong, many customers like to add an egg when drinking cocoa.Therefore, when the customer orders cocoa, the waiter will habitually ask: do you want to put eggs?After studying this phenomenon, some psychologists suggested that waiters should not ask whether they want to put eggs, because such questions are not restrictive and customers are elusive for a while.And it's better to ask: do you want one or two eggs?Limit the other party's choices, so as to sell more eggs.

·Selective questions This is a commonly used way of asking questions in conversations between family members or friends. The purpose of the questioner does not care whether the other party makes any choice or not.If your friend comes to your house as a guest, you invite him to dinner, but you don't know how much he can drink, so you ask: Do you want brandy or beer?Makes everyone feel at ease. · Polite questions This way of asking questions is because the other party has any taboos or is worried about being embarrassed by the other party's refusal to answer, so he has to go around in circles and use more tactful questions.

For example, a young man fell in love with a girl, but he didn't know whether the girl loved him too, and he couldn't say it directly, so the young man tentatively asked: Can I walk with you? This kind of tactful question is very clever. If the woman is unwilling to communicate, even if she refuses, it will not embarrass both parties. ·Negotiation questions This way of asking questions is mostly based on the questioner's intention to ask the other party to accept and do it, using a negotiating tone to achieve his own goals. If you are the owner of the company and ask the secretary to draft a contract, after you explain your intentions and requirements, you should ask in a negotiating tone: Do you think this is okay?Is there anything wrong?In this way, the secretary will feel your respect for him, and will happily complete the tasks you entrust to him.

In short, no matter which type of question you ask, you must pay attention to the method. Each method has its advantages and limitations. Emotions should be used flexibly to achieve the best results.Otherwise, it will fail.