Chapter 9 winner's breakfast

Growth means change, and change involves taking risks, stepping from the known to the unknown. author unknown McCann went to his room and found that the clothes that had been left in the car had been folded on the chest of drawers or hung in the open wardrobe.What amused him was that a Gideon International Bible was also found in the nightstand.He opened the window and let the night outside flow in. This is something Xiaona will never tolerate at home, because she is afraid of spiders or other scary things crawling in.McCann was nestled deep in the heavy duvet like a child. After reading a few verses, the Bible fell out of his hands, the lights were turned off, and someone kissed his cheek. He was also gently lifted off the ground and entered a dream of flying.

People who have never flown like this may think that those who believe they have flown are fools, but there may be at least a little envy behind their backs.He hadn't had a dream of flying in years, not since the Great Lament, but tonight, McCann flew high into the starry night, and the air was clear and cool without being uncomfortable.He soared over lakes and rivers, over the coast and several islets fringed by reefs. Strange to say, McCann learned to fly like this in a dream, leaving the ground without any support, no wings, no flying machine, just himself.The initial flight is usually limited to a few inches high, mostly out of fear, or more correctly, the fear of falling.Slowly increasing the altitude by one or two feet, and finally flying higher, this made him more confident.And he found that the fall was not painful at all, just a few slow-motion rebounds, which also added to his confidence.Slowly, he learned to climb into the clouds, fly vast distances, and land softly.

When he flew over the rugged mountains and the clear and white coast as he wished, intoxicated by the long-lost wonder of flying in his dreams, something suddenly grabbed his ankle and threw him out of the sky.In just a few seconds, he was dragged down from a high place, face first, and thrown heavily onto the dirt road with deep scratches.The thunder shook the ground, and the rain immediately drenched him all over.Then the scene came again: the daughter's face was illuminated by lightning, and she cried out silently: Daddy!Then she turned and ran into the darkness, only to see her red dress briefly flash a few times before disappearing.He struggled to get out of the mud and the rain, only to be drawn deeper into both.Just as he was being dragged down, he gasped and woke up.

His heart was beating violently, and his imagination was still stuck in the nightmare picture, and it took a few minutes to realize that it was just a dream.But even as the dream gradually fades from consciousness, the emotion lingers.The dream provoked such anguish that before he could get out of bed, he would once again wrestle with the despair that had plagued him for so many days. With an anguished expression, he looked around the room in the dawning gloom, which crept in around the shutters.This wasn't his bedroom, it didn't look or feel like it at all.where is he?Think fast, McCann, think fast!Then he remembered.He's still in the cabin with those three funny characters, and they all think they're God.

This kind of thing can't really happen.With a grunt, McCann pulled his feet off the bed and sat on the edge, burying his head in his hands.He thought back to the day before, and again he felt deep fear, wondering if he was crazy.Because he has never been a sentimental person, no matter who the father is, he feels nervous, and he doesn't know how to treat that Sha Ruiyu.He admitted that he still liked Jesus quite a lot, but he seemed the least God-like of the three. He let out a heavy sigh.If God is really here, why doesn't He take away his nightmares?He decided that sitting awkwardly wasn't going to help, so he went to the bathroom.To his delight, everything he needs to shower has been carefully laid out for him.He took his time enjoying the warm water, shaved, and put on his clothes when he returned to his bedroom.

The tempting aroma of coffee attracted his attention to the coffee table by the door, where a cup of hot coffee was waiting for him.He took a sip, opened the shutters, and stood looking out of the bedroom window at the lake, which he had only glimpsed the night before. The surface of the lake is perfectly smooth as a mirror, with only the occasional trout jumping up after breakfast, and the tiny waves stir up ripples, spreading across the dark blue lake, and finally being slowly absorbed back by the wider lake.He figured the other side was about half a mile away.Dewdrops glisten everywhere, and the love of the sun is reflected in the diamond-shaped tears of the morning.

The three canoes were staggered and idle by the dock, seemingly waving at him, but McCann shrugged his shoulders and shook off the thought.The joy of canoeing is no more.Too many bad memories. The dock reminded him of the night before.Did he really lie there with the One who created the universe?McCann shook his head and stood there blankly.What the hell is going on here?What is their true identity, and what do they want from him?No matter what it was, he knew he couldn't afford it. The smell of eggs and bacon mixed with something else wafted into the room and interrupted his thoughts.McCann decided it was time to show up and ask for his own breakfast.As he entered the living room, he heard Cockburn's familiar tune from the kitchen, followed by a rather beautiful negro soprano: Oh, that love that kindles the fire of the sun and makes me hot.Pop shows up with a plate full of muffins, fried potatoes, and some kind of vegetable in both hands.She wears a long, flowing dress that looks African-inspired, with a vibrantly colored turban.She looked radiant, almost luminous.

You know what, she exclaimed, I love that kid's song!I really like Kirkburn, you know.She glanced at McCann, who had just sat down at the table. McCann nodded, and his appetite suddenly increased. Yes, she went on, I know you like him too. McCann smiled.This is a fact.Kirkburn has been the family's favorite for many years, first it was him, then he and Xiaona, and each child has a different degree of love for him after that. So, honey, Dad asked, continuing to wonder what he was up to.Did you have a good dream last night?You know, sometimes dreams are important and can be a way of opening the windows and letting the dirty air out.

McCann knew it was an invitation to open the door to his inner fears, but he wasn't ready to ask her to enter that hole with him.I slept well, thank you.He replied, then quickly changed the subject.Is he your favourite?I mean Kirkburn? She stopped and looked at him.McKinsey, I don't have a favorite person, I just like him very much. You seem to have a crush on a lot of people, McCann remarked suspiciously.Is there anyone you don't particularly like? She raised her head and rolled her eyes, as if mentally reviewing every catalog of names created.No, I can't find any.I guess that's just me.

McCann was interested.Have you ever been angry with any of them? certainly!Too much!What parent is not angry?There's so much to be mad at about the mess my kids make, and the mess they make themselves.I don't like a lot of the choices they make, but that anger, especially to me, is still an expression of love.I love the people I'm mad at just as much as I love the people I'm not mad at. McCann, however, paused.What about your anger?If you're going to pretend to be Almighty God, it seems like you need to be a little more angry. do i have it now That's my thought.Didn't you run around and kill people in the Bible?You don't seem to meet this requirement.

McCann, I understand how disorienting all of this must be for you.But the only person here pretending is you.That's who I am, and I'm not trying to fit anyone's needs. But you want me to believe that you are God, and I just can't see that McCann doesn't know how to finish the sentence, so I just give up. I'm not asking you to believe anything, but I'm going to tell you that if you just accept the status quo instead of trying to make it fit your preconceived notions, you'll find your day a lot better. But if you are a god, aren't you the one who knocks down the bowl full of anger and throws people into the lake of fire?McCann could feel his deep anger resurging, pushing the questions out of his mouth, and he was a little annoyed at his own lack of self-control.But he still asked: Honestly, don't you like punishing people who let you down?Hearing this, Dad stopped his preparations and turned to McCann.He could see a deep sadness in her eyes.I'm not the god you think I am, McKenzie.I don't need to punish people for their sins.Sin itself is punishment, eating up a person from within.It is not my purpose to punish sin, but my pleasure to cure sin. I don't understand You are right, you do not understand.She said with a smile, but there was still sadness on the corner of her mouth.But then again, we're not done yet. At this moment, Jesus and Sha Ruiyu came in from the back door talking and laughing, and were having a lively conversation.Jesus walks in, dressed similarly to the day before, just jeans and a light blue shirt with a button on the collar that accentuates his dark brown eyes.On the other hand, Sha Ruiyu's dress is very meticulous, and the lace will sway with the slightest breeze or when she speaks.Rainbow patterns shimmer and change shape with her every gesture.Macken wondered if she had ever been completely still.He himself is very suspicious. Dad lowered himself to meet McCann's eye level.You raised some important questions, and I promise, we'll come back to them.But let's have breakfast together now. McCann nodded, a little embarrassed that his attention had turned to the food.He was hungry anyway, and there was so much to eat. Thank you for the breakfast.He told his father that Jesus and Sha Ruiyu were also seated at this time. What?she said with mocking disgust.Are you going to close your eyes and bow your head in thanks?She started walking to the kitchen, whining as she went.Tut, tut, tut.What has become of this world?You're welcome, dear.She waved McCann over the shoulder, and returned a moment later with another bowl of hot stuff that smelled delicious and mouth-watering. They passed each other delicious food, and McCann watched intently as Pa joined Jesus and Sha Ruiyu in their conversation.The topic is about reconciling an estranged family, but it's not the content of their conversations that fascinates McCann, but the way they relate to each other.He has never seen the sharing of three people can be so simple and beautiful.Everyone seemed to pay more attention to the other two than to themselves. What do you think, McCann?asked Jesus, making a sign to him. I don't know what you guys are talking about.McCann said, mouth half-full of delicious vegetables.But I like the way you guys handle it. Wow, said Pa, having just brought another dish from the kitchen.Eat those dishes slowly, young man.Those things can give you diarrhea if you're not careful. Well, said McCann, I'll try to remember.While reaching for the plate in her hand, she turned to Jesus and said: I like the way you treat each other.That's definitely not what I thought God looked like. What's the meaning? Oh, I know you are one and all, and there are three of you.And yet you respond to each other with such graciousness, shouldn't one of you be more of a boss than the other two? The three looked at each other, as if they had never thought about this question. I mean, McCann explained hastily, I always thought the Father was kind of the boss and Jesus was the one who obeyed, you know, obedience.I'm not sure exactly what role the Holy Spirit is going to play.He I mean she uh Mikan tried not to look at Sha Ruiyu when he was stuttering.Anyway, Holy Spirit always seems to be a bit like uh Free spirit?Papa suggested. correct!A free spirit, but still under the direction of the Father.Does that make sense? Jesus looks at Dad, clearly struggling to make sense of this apparently serious point.Do you think that makes sense, Dad?Honestly, I can't understand what this guy is talking about. The old man raised his head with a wrinkled face, as if he was thinking with incomparable concentration.No, I've been trying to figure it out, but I'm sorry he confused me. You know what I'm talking about, McCann is a little frustrated.I mean who calls the shots.Don't you have a chain of command? chain of command?It sounds scary!Jesus said. At least tied together, Pop added, and they all laughed.Then Pop turned to McCann and sang: Golden chains, but chains nonetheless. Don't worry about those two, Sha Ruiyu interrupted, and at the same time stretched out her hand to comfort and appease him.They are just playing with you.It's actually a topic that all three of us are interested in. McCann nodded, relieved and somewhat annoyed that he had lost his cool again. McKinsey, there is no concept of ultimate sovereignty between us, only unity.We are in the circle of relationships, not in the chain of command or what your ancestors said was the big chain of life.What you see here is a relationship without any pressure from power.We don't have to wield power over each other because we're always looking out for the best way.The class system doesn't make sense among us.In fact, this is your problem, not our problem. Yeah?how come? Humanity is so lost and scarred that you can hardly comprehend that people can work or live together without someone calling the shots. But every human institution, as far as I can think of, from politics to business down to marriage, is governed by such ideas.This is our social fabric network.McCann asserted. What a waste!As Dad said, he picked up the empty plate and walked towards the kitchen. That's why it's so hard for you to experience real relationship, Jesus added.Once you have a class system, you need regulations to protect and manage, then you need to maintain the laws of the regulations and enforce orders, and finally it becomes some kind of chain of command or command system.This system destroys relationships, not enhances them.So you rarely see or experience relationships that exclude power.The class system imposes laws and regulations, and as a result you miss out on the wonderful relationship we expected you to enjoy. so what?McCann said sarcastically, sitting back in his chair.It looks like we're getting used to it pretty well. Sha Ruiyu quickly replied: Don't take adaptation as your goal, but take temptation as reality. So, oh, can I have some more of those veggies?So we have unknowingly become too concerned with sovereignty? You can say that!Dad replied, handing McCann the plate of vegetables, but didn't let him go until he pulled twice.I'm just doing it for you, son. Sha Ruiyu continued: When you choose independence over relationship, you become a threat to each other.Others become objects to be manipulated or managed for your pleasure.What you usually think of as sovereignty is just an excuse used by the powerful to make others fit their purposes. Wouldn't that be very helpful?Can it prevent people from fighting or getting hurt endlessly? sometimes.But in a selfish world, it can also do a great deal of harm. But don’t you just use it to control evil? We are careful to respect your choices, so we operate within your systems, even though what we seek is to free you from them.Dad went on.Creation has gone a different way than we intended.In your world, the worth of the individual must often be weighed against the survival of the system, be it a political, economic, social, or religious system and indeed any system.First one, then several, and finally even many are easily sacrificed for the good or survival of the system.In one form or another, this condition lurks behind every power struggle, every prejudice, every war, and every abusive relationship.This sense of gaining power and independence has become so commonplace that it is now considered normal. Is not it? It's just the paradigmatic pattern of being human.Dad added, and came back with more food.Just like water is to fish, it is too common to be invisible and not a problem.This is the Matrix, an evil structure that keeps you hopelessly trapped in it without even realizing it's there. Jesus continued on the subject.You are the crowning glory of creation, made in our image, unencumbered by structure, and free to simply be in relationship to me and to each other.If you really learn to value each other's concerns as much as your own, there will be no need for a class system. McCann sat back in his chair, hesitating about the implications of the words.So you're saying that as long as we humans use power to protect ourselves You are surrendering to this matrix, not us.Jesus then finished speaking. And now, Sha Ruiyu interjects, we're back to square one, to an earlier statement of mine: You humans are so lost and scarred that you can hardly understand that relationships can exist without a hierarchy.So you think God must be in a hierarchy like you.But we don't. But how can we change this?People just take advantage of us. They probably will.But McCann, we're not asking you to do this with someone else, we're asking you to do it with us.That's the only place to start.We will not take advantage of you. McCann, said Dad carefully, he couldn't help but listen, we want to share with you the love, joy, freedom and light that resides within us.We created you humans to be with us in face-to-face relationship, to join us, the circle of love.Although it is difficult for you to understand, everything that has ever happened has taken place entirely for this purpose without violating choice or will. There is so much pain in the world and all kinds of wars and disasters that have ruined thousands of people, how can you still say that?McCann's voice dropped to a whisper.And what's the value of a little girl being murdered by some crazy psychopath?There it was again, the question that had burned a hole in his soul.You may not have caused those things, but you certainly didn't prevent them either. McKenzie, Dad replied softly, not seeming at all offended by his accusation.There are millions of reasons for allowing pain, harm and suffering to occur and not being eliminated, but most of the reasons can only be understood from each individual's own experience.I am not evil.You are the ones who embrace fear, pain, power and power in relationships.But your choice will not be stronger than our purpose. I will use every choice you make to achieve the ultimate benefit and the most lovely result. You see, Sha Ruiyu interrupted, broken human beings center their lives on what seems to be good for them, but that doesn't satisfy them, it doesn't set them free.They indulge in power or the illusion that power provides security.When catastrophe strikes, those same people turn against the illusory powers they trust.In the midst of their disappointment, they either softened toward me or became bolder and more independent.If only you could see how it would all end, and see how we can accomplish things without going against the will of a single human being, you would understand.One day you will understand. But these costs!McCann hesitated.Look at the price of all the pain, all the suffering, everything is so horrible and evil!He paused, looking down at the table.Look at the price you pay.Is it worth it? worth!The three of them answered in unison, full of joy. But how can you say that?McCann blurted out.It sounds like the end will stop at nothing, that you will stop at nothing to achieve the results you want, even if it costs billions of lives. McKenzie, it was Dad's voice again, this time especially gentle and gentle.You really don't understand yet.You are trying to make sense of the world you live in based on a very narrow and incomplete picture of reality.It's like watching a parade through the hole of hurt, pain, ego, power, all while believing you're alone and insignificant.It's all a big lie.You see pain and death as absolute evil, and God as an absolute traitor, or, at best, as an unreliable God.You make your own rules, judge my actions, and find me guilty. McKinsey, the real underlying flaw in your life is that you think I'm not kind.If you know that I am good, and everything including means, ends, and all processes of personal life are under the protection of my good will, then you will believe me even though you may not necessarily understand what I am doing.But you don't believe it. I do not believe?McCann asked, but that wasn't really a question, it was a statement of fact, and he knew it.Others seemed to know too, and the table remained silent. Sha Ruiyu spoke.McKinsey, you can no more create trust than you can create humility.It's a matter of having or not.Trust is the fruit that grows in a relationship where you know you are loved.You can't trust me because you don't know that I love you. There was another silence, and finally McCann looked up at Dad and said: I don't know how to change that. You can't change, a person can't change.But together we can see change happen.Now I just want you to be with me and find that our relationship is not about your performance or that you have to please me.I am not a hooligan, not some self-centered and demanding little god, I insist on using my own method.I am kind and I only desire what is best for you.You cannot find out through sin, condemnation or coercion, only through loving relationships.And I do love you. Sha Ruiyu stood up from the table and looked directly at McCann.McKenzie, she proposed, I would like you to come and help me in the garden, if you will.I have some things to do there before tomorrow's celebration.We can continue to discuss relevant elements of this topic there, shall we? Of course good.McCann responded and took his leave from the table. The last sentence, he turned to add.I just can't imagine what the end result will be, to justify it all. McKenzie, Dad got up from his chair and walked around the table to give him a big hug.We are not proving, we are redeeming.