Chapter 9 Chapter IX Letter

Friedrichka's wrinkled hands are very elegantly holding the large white porcelain pot that is easy to use.Opal ring in a rich, dark colour. Just listen to the sound of pouring black tea into the cup to know how hot it is. It was also Federica who taught me these secrets.Sitting in the same chair in the same living room. long time no see!Federica handed me fragrant black tea, it looks good. Outside the open floor-to-ceiling windows, across the balcony with a row of withered potted plants, you can overlook the streets of Milan. I just can't keep plants alive. I remembered what Federica had said.The withered potted plants are left on the balcony.Little has changed here.

Over tea, I talked about Daniela.Daniela and the little princess, and a fairytale-like baby room. Daniela also used to drink tea here when she was in primary school.After ballet class, looking out the window that is gradually darkening. Why didn't you bring an American man?asked Federica. I wanted to say that Ma Wu had something to do, but I didn't say anything.Because she said it, she would say that it is okay to come at night, or on weekends. How long have you been back to Milan?Federica asked again. I said: six years.It's been so long. Friedrichja was very happy when I decided to go to Japan for university.

That's great, Bellissimo! She said Bellissimo several times, and said that it is very important to know the mother country. You haven't changed at all.Federica said. I raised my face in astonishment.You have changed!Daniela and Albert both said the same thing.Even if they don't say it, I know it myself. hasn't changed? There was a hint of self-deprecation in my voice, which Federica pretended not to notice. Unchanged.You have been honest since childhood.Be honest and cautious. She smiled slightly.I suddenly felt like crying. Friedrichka tapped my knee with her bony hand.

It's not a bad thing to take your time. She got up and went into the kitchen, boiled water for tea, and came back smoking a sweet cigarette. Saw Paula and Gina the other day.It's been a long time since we drank together.Federica said. Are you at Biffi? Biffi is a tavern with an old-fashioned feel, where Gina and the others enjoy drinking a glass of liqueur.Old women can drink very well when they get together. Both of them are very worried about you. I often wonder who am I drinking with when I'm Friedrich's age?Maybe it's time to ask where. here?Home Country?Or America?

Have you thought about remarrying?I asked. Friedrichka replied simply: No. Ever thought about getting out of here? No. She pursed her lips and let out a puff of smoke.I smile slightly.Grab a dried fig stuffed with cream and walnuts. Occasionally, I yearn very much for the harshness and calmness of Federica and Gina, who were born here, spent their long lives here, and probably will end their lives here. I often mention it to Shunzheng. I see what you mean. Shun Zheng's eyes were bright and straightforward, and he said eagerly. I am in Milan and Shunzheng in New York, both have similar experiences.We all have the feeling that this is not our home.I feel like an outsider.

Even with all the intimate moments with Federica and Daniela, the mood was always there. Where I should be. Neither Tokyo nor Japan, at least not for me. I understand, but it's good to have options, at least room to wander. Space to wander.I think this sentence is so beautiful.Shun normal often say such beautiful words.very naturally.unconsciously.A positive person.I don't know if he's tough or slender, at least the energetic one.romantic.Some are all that I lack. sunflower. With Federica staring at me, I felt like my mind was being seen through. The water is boiling, do you want a cup of tea?

Thank you, I will. I replied, looking idly at the Venetian glass cigarette case. On the way home, looking at the gray sky through the bus window, I thought of Ma Wu. By the way, do American men speak Italian? After kissing the cheek at the door in farewell, Federica asked. know a little. very good. As she spoke, she smiled, almost like a school teacher. Greet him for me. must. The rattling elevator, the dimly lit lobby.The apartment I used to live in. At dusk, the streets are crowded with people.Familiar streets, the appearance of the car, the vibration from the soles of the feet, and the silver lever.

I don't know why I feel incongruous with taking Ma Wu to that apartment.My favorite, Ma Wu, is cheerful and gentle, and always spoils my Ma Wu. Don't worry about time! Federica said. You haven't changed.Be honest and cautious. Be honest and cautious. Last year, I quarreled with Ma Wu because of the school manual Albert gave me. I have never forgotten what Ma Wu said at that time. I have absolutely no influence on your life. I know that is not a blame, but an accusation, so it is not Ma Wu who should apologize, but me. But it was Ma Wu who actually apologized.always like this.

The bus shook its exhaust fumes as it drove through the bustling neighborhood. After dinner, play Scrabble with Ma Wu.Ma Wu has five wins and two losses tonight.While playing, he drank the high-end wine brought back by Ma Wu. How about going to England for the holidays?After the game, Ma Wu stroked my soft hair on the sofa and said. U.K?Are you going to Greece? Ma Wu said that there are delicious seafood dinners in the UK.Also, your parents are in the UK. I scowled.So go? I want to visit them.Ma Wu's voice is very sincere, Just visit! Dad works in the bank and has been sent overseas for thirty years.This kind of life may be in line with his personality!For several years, he lived in London.

This is not a good idea.I take a sip of wine, I don't want to disturb them. I didn't intend to disturb them, Ma Wuxiang reacted quickly while playing the game and said: I just think it's strange that I have never visited them while living so close. There is a photo of me and Angela on the coffee table.Shot in Lugano.Angela put her arms around me and laughed heartily. I don't think it's amazing.I said, get up and put water in the bathtub.Also, the UK isn't that close either. Very close!Ma Wu followed up with the bathroom, which was much closer than the United States and Japan.

I held up my hands in a gesture of surrender.Turn on the faucet, and the hot water bursts out with steam. They have their own lives, I touched the hot water falling loudly, turned my back to Ma Wu and said: I have my life. The sound of hot water, the smell of steam. I know. Hearing the lonely voice that seemed to be missing, I couldn't help turning my head away.Ma Wu! I know, you have your life, don't let me get close. The sound of hurt.Ma Wu gave a light smile in despair, and repeated I know.I immediately regretted it. Ma Wu. I want to say don't make such an expression, I didn't mean it.Go to the UK for a holiday!It's okay to see my parents, if you want it that much.I will go wherever I go, as long as we are together, I want to say that. sorry. I stood there like a wooden man, and the only thing I could say was this sentence. You don't have to apologize.Ma Wu smiled again, you are so straight! I didn't say anything. full of sorrow. The next day was a sunny Saturday. When I woke up, Ma Wu had already gone to the gym.I stay in the bedroom without moving.Soft beige bed sheets, plenty of sunlight pouring in from the windows, and tasteful furnishings.Listening to Ravel at a very low volume.I don't know if this is my place. The Ma Wu who came back from the gym is the usual Ma Wu. morning.Ma Wu kisses the top of my head, my baby loves to sleep in despite the weather! Mawu always smells like soap.Strong boat-like shoulders and chest that go well with a denim shirt.Thai maids who specialize in laundry wash the ironed Mawu clothes. I can't help but want Ma Wu. Peeping between his cotton trousers and lambskin loafers, perhaps his bare ankles, made me want to unbutton the starched shirt one by one, remove the belt, and kiss his chest and stomach.I wanted to make love to him just like that. Still not up? Of course, it doesn't actually do that. I'm not used to doing it in a bright room. When I first started dating Ma Wu, I made it clear.From then on, Ma Wu only wanted my body at night or at least at dusk. It's time to get up. We go to the coffee shop and have an American brunch.Baked fruit with cream cheese, coffee, crab salad, French fries, and fruit.I went for a walk to Pei Ke to buy some things, and it was late in the afternoon when I got home. There is a letter. Holding the food bag in his arms, Ma Wu bent over and took out the mail from the mailbox.The sun shone beautifully on his bright brown hair. is yours. I go up the stairs first and open the automatic lock. Junsei Agata. I doubt my ears.His back was stiff and his fingers were frozen.Ma Wu followed up from behind with brisk steps.A Xingshunzheng.Was that what Ma Wu said just now? Ma Wu casually put the white envelope on the kitchen table.Open the refrigerator, put the bought food in, and ask: Who is it? ah? that letter.After the work was over, Ma Wu opened a can of beer.Do you want a drink? No, I don't drink. After I answered, I prayed that I would pick up the envelope on the table naturally. A Xingshun is a college classmate. Well!Ma Wu drank beer with relish and said: Let's have dinner later! OK! I managed to squeeze out what looked like a smile. I have to wait until later in the evening to read the letter.I waited for Ma Wu to enter the bedroom before reading the letter in the kitchen.Junzheng's nostalgic blue ballpoint pen handwriting.Shunzheng writes meticulously, beautifully and neatly. It takes effort to read the entire letter.The strength of Naxin's hand was insufficient, and the journey was interrupted several times due to memory flooding or being out of breath.Every time I look at the walls, floor and ceiling.Walls, floors, ceilings, refrigerators, sideboards, microwave ovens.Inhale, exhale, find a way to continue watching. It was a long letter. sunflower: Please forgive me for writing you suddenly.long time no see.I have been troubled since just now, how should this letter start and how should it end?After all, I am not good at writing letters. It is especially difficult to write to you who love Japanese more than others and who is also good at reading. It's really stupid to say that, you will probably laugh! I heard you went back to Milan.Listen to what Chong said.A new life was also started there.I should say very relieved! I asked for your address by force, I hope you will not be angry with Chong. It's early summer. Early summer in Milan is beautiful! I remember the look on your face when you said this. I live in Mayhill now.The apartment you are familiar with.The same room as when I was a student, wandering around the same as when I was a student.If you were here, you might scold me. Chong said.Your lover is a good man, he can see that that man cherishes you very much. Aoi, I have to apologize to you, so I am writing this letter. I thought, maybe you don't want to hear me make excuses for the past.But please listen anyway. I didn't know my father was here and told you some unbelievable things. sorry. I hate my own stupidity, though I hate to attribute it to my youth and immaturity.I didn't know about the miscarriage until today. Anyway, the child is hopeless. I am so ashamed that I blamed you and called you emotionally when you told me you had an abortion. It's been a long time.I am sorry to remind you of the unpleasant past when you have left Japan and returned to Milan where you grew up to live a new life. Still so selfish! You'll say it with a sigh like you used to!Or just smile quietly! I dare not say please forgive me.Just want to apologize to you. The only thing I want to say is, why didn't you tell me all about it?This alone makes me a little lonely. Take care of yourself! Greetings man! Unlike you, I am not familiar with plants.However, Hanegi Park is in full bloom at the moment, and the wild roses over the Children's Square, I think they are probably wild roses, are blooming all over the ground. After reading the letter, I didn't move for a while, sitting in a daze like cerebral palsy. Shunzheng. I called softly, and the sound brought a strangely strange feeling to the kitchen.Surprisingly strange feeling and an avalanche of nostalgia. I folded the letterhead and put it back in the envelope.Fingers trembling. I need some hair, put away the letter, and walk to the balcony of the bedroom.Ma Wu, who seemed to be in a deep sleep, might still be awake.Even so, I don't care anymore.It was a wet and cold June night, and the street lights shone in the quiet alleyway where only a few cars were parked.The familiar streets of Milan. It was hard to believe that Shunzheng would write a letter.I am so attached to remember the words written in blue ink! Shunzheng. This time, I muttered as if to clearly confirm the echo of the voice. For the next week, Ma Wu had clients to entertain.Make reservations for restaurants, hotel pick-ups, meals, drinks, and invitations to the apartment for drinks.Going to the gym is accompanied by Ma Wu, while shopping is accompanied by me. Even during this period, Shunzheng's letter never left my heart. Meiqiu.Shunzheng.The language of nostalgia flows into my heart with the air of Tokyo, overflowing my limbs. For example, when dining with Ma Wu's guests, sitting on a chair in a jewelry store, and letting Ma Wu kiss the top of my head, I still embrace that air. closed memory.Close the lid, wrap it in paper, and tie it with a rope to keep the memories that are going to be placed far away. I still remember everything. Even the street, the details of college life, friends, and everything that happened in Heshun. When I found out I was pregnant, I was terrified.Shunzheng is not the only one who is young and innocent. It was raining that day.Rain in Tokyo in the cold winter came to the apartment and claimed to be Shunzheng's father. There was an unknown woman beside her. She didn't say her name, and I didn't ask. who are you The person who claimed to be my father looked at me and asked unhappily.When I wanted to make tea, he said coldly: You don't have to do that kind of thing. It was the woman who found the ultrasound photos and the paper with pregnancy precautions that I brought back from the hospital. What's this? Shunzheng's father was a little surprised, the voice was indeed surprised, but on the other hand he seemed a little excited. Until now, that voice often appears in dreams. Regarding abortion, Shunzheng does not need to blame himself.Abortion is my own decision.I'm afraid.Because I was unhappy with my pregnancy, I thought Shunzheng would be unhappy too, and I was afraid.take it off!I couldn't bear to hear that from Shunzheng's mouth.why?It makes me a million times sadder to have him blame so much. It was a long time ago. Thursday, rain.Finish work at the jewelry store and go home and take a shower.Pour a glass of Amaretta and drink it over ice. He wanted to see Ma Wu's Jijia come back and stand on the balcony for a while.Shaking the glass, listening to the crisp sound of ice cubes.Sweet amber liquid. Greetings man! Shunzheng wrote so. Chong also knows that that person cherishes you very much. indeed.I touch my lips with wine. Yesterday, I went to the airport with Ma Wu to see off the client.As usual, Ma Wu bought a whiskey shot glass as a gift from me, and put it in my hand.Say goodbye to your guests after a final cup of coffee, a handshake and a formal kiss in the dining bar. After the guests left, Ma Wu hugged me from behind on the spot.We just stand there.Watching the passengers coming and going in a hurry in front of the exit room. so perfect! Ma Wu kissed the top of my head and said. i love you. I pressed Ma Wu's hands on my chest, and we stuck together like that, walking a few steps awkwardly like two people on three legs. Jijia didn't come back. I went back to the room and added some Amaret.Wet hair stuck to the neck. I like your neck best. Until now, I clearly remember Shunzheng's lips on my neck.Hot but soft lips. Why do you do that? At that time, Shunzheng cried. I don't forgive you, and I don't think I will ever forgive you! I didn't mean to hurt him like that. We are so unbelievably in love.inseparable.Thought we'd be together forever. When I recovered, I picked up the phone. Watching with incredulity, his fingertips hit the phone number in that room correctly, a certain combination of numbers that he hadn't thought of for years. It feels very unlike what happened in reality. He just heard the vivid voice of sending a message, and his fingertips froze.The sound of a Japanese telephone call. Hi, I'm Agata, I'm out now, please leave your name and message. I swallowed.It's Shun Zheng's voice.A vague and soft voice. Beep, harsh sound. I panicked, went blank for a few seconds, and then hurriedly put down the receiver.Goosebumps all over my body. sunflower? Ma Wu's voice came from the door.I close my eyes and adjust my breathing. What on earth do I want to do?What are you going to do? Are you here? Ma Wu, who was wearing an impeccably fitted dark green suit, poked his head in. I'm home!I just got out of the shower. I put my arms around him from behind and whispered in his ear on tiptoe.Ma Wu has the smell of the car.The interior is luxurious, spacious and comfortable. How about noodles for dinner?Right away. Hearing Ma Wu Sure's calm voice, I helped him change his clothes. The rainy air flows in through the open French windows.