Chapter 30 Chapter Thirty

Yin'er sat on the straw mat, leaning against the base of the wall with her arms around her knees, looking at the window with thick wooden slats nailed to it, and through the gaps between the slats, one could see the evening sky in autumn. Her heart was tightly clenched, like a shriveled eggplant stuffed between her lungs and ribs, soaked in the bitter water of incomparable depression and bitterness.There was no disease or disaster, and there was no sign beforehand. A fat and white son said he was gone and he was gone.No one can tell how the child died.Said to kill, people in the room were watching all day long, but nothing abnormal was found.Lafayette ordered all the slaves in Jingren Palace to be taken into vacant rooms, and asked them to confess, but they didn't find out anything.It doesn't make sense to say that he died of illness, because even the imperial doctor couldn't tell what disease he had.

Not to mention his son's death, Rong Qing was also implicated.It's all her fault, because she was so sad about her son's death that she was in a trance and talked nonsense, so that Cixi knew the truth about her son's biological father.It was heard that Rong Qing escaped, his father was arrested and thrown into prison, and his whole family was kicked out of Beijing. Even his uncle Enhai was dismissed from his job as a servant in the palace.If her brother hadn't been smoking opium, he wouldn't have been able to go to jail if he was about to die.In short, many people were involved in this action. As for where Rong Qing went right now, she didn't know, maybe it was not important to her, the important thing was that she would never see him again.

Her eyes left the window and reluctantly fell on the opposite wall, looking at the mottled and peeling lime wall, where Master Zhen carved dense marks on it, which was when Concubine Zhen was locked here, to remember her life. As a mark of the days spent here, Master Zhen lived in the three bungalows in the north for two years. As a maid serving Master Zhen, she spent more than half a year with her here.Unexpectedly, Master Zhen died, but now it was her turn to be imprisoned in this forgotten corner.It stands to reason that, as a court lady, she should have been imprisoned in the vacant room of the clan mansion to wait for Lafayette to dispose of.Because Cixi originally thought that the child she was pregnant with was from Guangxu, although she had not been formally canonized as a nobleman, she had already lived in Jingren Palace. If she was sent to an empty room at once, it would be tantamount to slapping herself and making others laugh.

She is no better than Concubine Zhen, and no one waits on her, so the door is always locked, and eunuchs come here to deliver three meals a day, and there is no one else to see.Occasionally, Xiao Hui would come back to see her, because nominally, Xiao Hui was still her eunuch, and it was he who reported this matter to Cixi. Looking at the mark left by Master Zhen on the wall, she knew that her end would be the same as her master's.She had already prepared for death, and she would rather die sooner.She knew that Lafayette would not let her go easily, let her die in such a simple way, and would definitely come up with very vicious tricks to deal with her.This is not to blame Lafayette, she really hurt Lafayette's heart, she must pay a huge price for what she did.

Suddenly she heard a light tap on the window.She thought it was the eunuch who delivered the meal, but thinking that the dinner had been delivered long ago, she thought that it must be Xiao Huihui who came to pass on Lafayette's order again.She turned her face slowly and looked out of the window, startled in her heart, thinking that she had lost her sight.Miss Yin, it's me!The people outside the window saw her staring blankly and called her repeatedly. Uncle Zhang!She got up from the ground and quickly rushed to the window. Am I dreaming? It's me, it's your Uncle Zhang, and I'm back in the palace as an errand.Chashuizhang felt very sorry for Yin'er when she saw that Yin'er had lost her shape.

You shouldn't be here, let them know, it's a big deal.Although Yin'er wanted to meet Chashuizhang very much, and wanted to ask him about his situation after breaking up.But thinking that he was looking at the garden in the royal tomb, and finally transferred back to the palace from the place where he dealt with ghosts all day long, so he couldn't be troubled anymore, so he kept urging him to leave here as soon as possible. Don't be afraid, Xiao Huihui is also my apprentice after all. That doesn't work either, other people will see it. He's fine!He uttered a sentence without beginning or end, in fact, he meant that Rong Qing was fine.Seeing that Yin'er didn't react for a while, she added that Rong Qing left, and went to Japan from Tianjin.

When did you see him?she asked suspiciously. A few days ago, I'm afraid it will be ten days. I do not believe.You coax me. I tucked my head in my trouser belt just to coax you? Uncle Zhang, I know you love me and want to say something nice. She has been scared by good things all these years.Because in the end, almost all good things turn out to be bad.Especially this time, Rong Qing gave birth to a fat son, and unexpectedly, a catastrophe occurred. Seeing that she didn't believe her, he felt unspeakably anxious, and suddenly remembered what Rong Qing had brought her, so he took out a small kit from his bosom and handed it to her: Look, this is what he left behind when he left. Let me give it to you, this kind of fake can't be done?

But I lost his child.The kit contained her hair.It was that year when he came to their house to get married, and when he learned that she was called into the palace, and the two of them hid in the house and wept bitterly, she twisted a strand of black hair from her head.In order to miss her, he hid this strand of blue silk in his kit, hung it around his neck, and never left his body.Looking at things and thinking about people, it seems that Cha Shui Zhang didn't lie to her.She held the brocade bag tightly with both hands, and couldn't help shedding tears. Don't cry, don't cry, there's no time.He hastened to persuade her.

What else did he say?She wiped the tears from her eye sockets. As soon as he opened his mouth, he froze there, because Rong Qing asked her not to wait for him, and let him persuade her, so he gave up this heart from now on, and found a good family after leaving the palace.Seeing her sad look, he really couldn't bear to say it. What did he say?she pressed. He keeps you alive.Said that no matter three years or five years, as long as you wait for him, he will definitely come back.He improvised some words to coax her. Yin'er didn't speak for a long time after listening.Recalling that it was also here at the beginning, she lied to Master Zhen more than once, saying that as long as she lived well, she would be able to reunite with the emperor.what's the result?In the end, they were stuffed into the mouth of the well without even seeing each other.Not to mention whether Cha Shui Zhang coaxed her or not, even if it was true, if he could wait for her, it would be impossible for her to get out from here.

Uncle Zhang!I took his heart, I didn't expect to get out of here alive, wait until one day, you can see him, return this to him, just say I'm sorry for him, she handed him the hair in the bag , I hope he can be handed over to Rong Qing one day, and it can be considered as a souvenir for him. Yin girl, listen to me Before Chashui Zhang finished speaking, suddenly many eunuchs rushed up from all around the hut, holding sticks in their hands, surrounding Chashui Zhang.The leading eunuch who was in charge of punishment was tall and big. He gave an order, and his subordinates hurriedly tied up the tea badge tightly.

Yin'er lay on the window, watching these people take the tea badge away.She stood there wanting to cry but couldn't scream, she slid and sat on the ground by the window, and after a long time, she pulled her hair and cried and screamed, beating her chest with both hands: Oh my God, how could I How bad is that?She asked herself over and over in her heart.Almost everyone and everything became messy when they got involved with her, without any good results.I did evil in my previous life, I was born a disaster! Since the farce of Yin'er giving birth to the prince happened, Cixi has been hiding in her quiet room, and she even avoided screaming when she met the ministers in the court.Holding the string of Buddhist beads that she seldom leaves her hands, she looked at the white jade Guanyin Bodhisattva on the table, feeling an unspeakable bitterness in her heart. Ever since she killed Tan Sitong during the 1898 years, she has once again stepped from behind the scenes to the front of the stage, regardless of state affairs, family affairs, and world affairs, it can be said that nothing suits her heart.Of course, the most heart-warming thing for her was the invasion of Beijing by the Eight-Power Allied Forces. Her majestic Queen Mother, the Holy Mother of the Qing Dynasty, took the emperor's son and hid all the way to Xi'an, and then ordered reforms under the pressure of foreigners.If I knew this earlier, why did I kill Tan Sitong in the first place?The Guangxu reform has changed to the sky, what else can it do to her old ancestor?In the past few years, the state affairs have been unbearable and a mess. Not to mention family affairs, even though Concubine Zhen was killed, Guangxu still couldn't change his mind.The emperor who was raised by one hand didn't dare to do anything to her in face, but he hated a hole in his heart and couldn't understand.No matter what matters now, no matter big or small, family affairs and government affairs, he will never say a word.Although she is in charge of government affairs, but she always wants to use the name of the emperor to the outside world, so he simply wants to let the emperor's father decide everything.Regardless of whether there are people around him or not, he always said the same thing, which is absolutely amazing. Then there is the matter of Yin'er.A court lady, who was pregnant with a wild seed, dared to plant it on the emperor's head. This kind of scandal was unheard of in the Qing Dynasty for hundreds of years, and even the previous dynasties rarely heard of it.What made her even more dumbfounded was that she was responsible for this incident.She forcibly sent Yin'er to Guangxu's side as an errand, and she wanted the emperor to accept her as his concubine. After the incident happened, Guangxu refused to admit it. She thought that Guangxu had lost face, and she was embarrassed to admit that he had an affair with the court lady.She solemnly canonized her as a nobleman, thinking that she was pregnant with the emperor's flesh and blood.Before her crown prince woke up from her dream, the child died inexplicably, and only then did she find out that the so-called little dragon species was someone else's species, which made her lose face. It was easier to kill Yin'er than an ant.She was not willing to let Yin'er die casually like this.The reason why she didn't deal with her was because she didn't think of a better way to deal with her to death.So when Xiao Hui came back to report and Cha Shuizhang sneaked to the North Third Office to meet Yin'er secretly, a vicious thought immediately struck her. Tea Zhang was tied up and sent to the manager's office. Li Lianying asked someone to untie the rope on his body and let the others back down. Then she complained to him angrily: "I said, brother, we finally transferred you back to the palace, and now you're still in the palace." You made such a big deal, didn't you mean to make me look good? Uncle!It is my fault.You mean enough to me, it's all my own fault.I can do whatever I want, and I have absolutely no complaints.Cha Shui Zhang said. If only I could do whatever I want.It's not me what to do now, but what Lafayette should do.Li Lianying smiled wryly, saying that Lafayette just said that she wanted to take him to Chuxiu Palace, and she wanted to ask him face to face. I just had an accident here, did she know about it?Tea Zhang asked. You haven't gone yet, Lafayette already knows. Cha Shui Zhang's heart sank, and he immediately realized that Xiao Hui had betrayed him.He was kind to others all his life, never offended anyone, especially in the palace, he was a good person, never thought that things would be broken by his disciples.In fact, he didn't pay much attention to the matter of Xiao Huihui, what he thought more about was what Lafayette would do with him. Li Lianying took the Chashuizhang to the quiet room of Chuxiu Palace, raised the bead curtain on the door, and let him in alone, while she stayed outside the door.As soon as Cha Shui Zhang entered the door, everything in front of him was exactly the same as when he was on duty here. The difference was that there was an extra incense burner in front of the Avalokitesvara statue on the desk, and a prayer mat was placed on the ground in front of the desk.In the past, Lafayette always thought that she was a bodhisattva in her previous life, and she only chanted sutras and bowed, never burned incense and kowtowed. It seems that she is more devout than before.Cixi stood in front of the Buddha statue in a daze, and when she saw him walking in, she turned to look at him. The servant Zhang Deshun kowtowed to Lafayette!Cha Shuizhang hurriedly kowtowed to Cixi on the ground. Zhang Deshun!You are so brave!Cixi's tone was not as severe as Cha Shuizhang imagined, which made him even more uneasy. Slaves be damned! If Li Lianying hadn't interceded for you, you would still be guarding the garden in the countryside right now?Not seeing him for three years, Cixi felt that he was much older.I remember that when he first entered the palace, he worked as an errand in Guangxu Palace, and he was less than twenty years old at that time. Lafayette is magnanimous, so that the servants can return to the palace. Are you talking nicely to coax me? A slave is what is in his heart. Then why don't you work hard when you come back here, and why go to the North Third Institute?she pressed. The slave is nostalgic, Yin'er was working with the slave in Chuxiu Palace, and when he heard that something happened to her, he thought she should not have done it, so he stammered. nonsense.She cut him off. If you don’t believe me, you can ask Wang Huihui. I greeted him in advance. But it's good to make up nonsense.She sighed, and sank down in the large dragon and phoenix chair. What happened in the past, I don't bother to ask any more. Tell me, what should I do with you now? Going back to what Lafayette said, according to the rules, he should be beaten to death with a stick.If Lafayette recited my slave so smokyly, boiled tea for you for a lifetime, and could reward a whole body of slave, slave would be grateful! It's telling the truth.She snorted through her nose and stopped talking. Cha Shui Zhang knelt on the ground, Ci Xi sat on the chair, neither of them spoke.The two were silent, each thinking about their own thoughts.Cha Shui Zhang knew that he was bound to die, but felt that his death was unjust.No, it was just because he passed a few words to Yin'er, and these words were meaningless to them.Lost a life for this.He doesn't blame heaven or earth, not even Xiao Huihui, he only blames himself.It is enough for a useless person like him to live to this age.Afterwards, that's all.He doesn't envy Li Lianying's splendor and wealth. For him, living has become a simple life, and life itself has no meaning.Although he didn't want to die, he was not so afraid of death. As long as Lafayette left him a whole body, it would be the best result for him. Ci Xi has always had an indescribable affection for Cha Shui Zhang, although she was very annoyed that he repeatedly failed her.She is a strong and paranoid old woman. Her strength comes from her paranoia, and this paranoia in turn makes her stronger.She always felt that Cha Shuizhang had never been against her, and he was an old man around her. She remembered that when her son Tongzhi was in power, he had been working as a servant in the palace, and it had been more than twenty years since then.Apart from Li Lianying, there are too few old people like him in the palace. Zhang Deshun, you are also an old man in the palace, you should also know the rules of your ancestors, it is reasonable to kill you.dont you agree?Cixi finally broke the silence. The slave understands. You look up and let me see.Chashuizhang has been lying on the ground since entering the door, and Cixi has never seen him change all these years.He raised his face slowly, avoiding her scrutiny with his eyes.Facing the warm yellow light of the palace lantern, she saw that he was much older than before, and his temples were suddenly covered with gray hair, and she couldn't help being stunned. He was twenty years younger than herself, but had more gray hair than her. But if I really want to kill him, I really can't bear it.There are not many people like you left in the palace, if you don't want to talk about the old saying, there are not many people in front of you.She unhurriedly explained the reasons on both sides.Cha Shuizhang couldn't figure out what she meant, so he knelt on the ground and dared not answer her words.Seeing that he didn't speak, she continued to talk, and the more she spoke, the more excited and angry she became. After all, you are different from Yin'er.I have never rubbed sand in my eyes.She's a climber, and she forced a shit bowl on my head. I can't take advantage of her! Lafayette!The slave is the one who is going to die, so speak boldly.In fact, Yin'er was engaged to Rong Qing before entering the palace, and she was an only child, so she shouldn't be working in the palace.Because of a mistake in the clan's mansion, he was selected into the palace.He understood her temper, and the more she yelled, it meant that she hadn't figured out how to deal with it. Yin'er, she could be forgiven, it was a slave who went to find her, and she didn't know in advance.If you want to kill, kill the servant. If she has served you before, spare her a school fox! You do love her quite a bit. According to what you say, the rules are not required? Lafayette!Rules are also made by people. Cixi suddenly burst out laughing. Before that, she had thought of a vicious method to punish Yin'er, but Cha Shuizhang's attitude just helped her.Thinking of this, she stopped smiling, and said to the tea chapter: I have drank your tea for half my life, but if you have second thoughts, you will kill me eight hundred times.Right now, I'll sell you a favor and spare Yin'er! Thank you Lafayette for your kindness!He couldn't believe that Cixi really agreed to his request, and hurriedly kowtowed on the ground several times. Don't kowtow in a hurry, I haven't said how to do it yet.Not only will I forgive her, I will also forgive you, and I will give you both a great grace! Cha Shuizhang didn't understand what Cixi meant, and was very excited.He lay on the ground, terrified and fearful, thinking that because he said that Yin'er and Rongqing were engaged to be married before, and allowed them to be together, he would end their years of love.Cixi stopped suddenly when she said this, and the quiet room was silent. He pricked up his ears and raised his eyes, as if the great grace that day was written on her face.After a while, Cixi finally spoke out the favor she had given him and Yin'er. As soon as her words fell to the ground, Cha Shuizhang couldn't help but feel terrified all over his body, he could hardly believe what he heard.However, Lafayette Jinkou said that her words are the supreme law.The grace she gave was too cruel and vicious for Yin'er.And to him, it was a terrible prank.But in order to keep Yin'er a school fox, including himself of course, he had to lie down on the ground, kowtowing his head to thank him, and weeping all the time. I'm in charge, pick a good day, you two are talented and beautiful, don't dislike anyone, and make a good family.This is the grace of Lafayette, allowing Yin'er to marry Cha Shuizhang and become his official wife.Because it was the marriage that Lafayette pointed out, even if the chashui Zhang left one day, Yin'er would not allow him to marry.In other words, while Cha Shui Zhang was alive, she guarded a useless person.Tea Zhang died, and she kept an empty house. As long as the Qing Dynasty remained unchanged, Yin'er had to follow this rule for the rest of her life. There have been precedents for court ladies marrying eunuchs in ancient times.It was called Caihu in the Han and Tang Dynasties, and it was called Duishi in the Ming Dynasty.It can be seen from the name that it means that the man and woman in the palace enjoy the privilege of eating together.This kind of fake couple is a kind of grace bestowed by the emperor to those special people among the eunuchs.For example, the great eunuch Wei Zhongxian in the Ming Dynasty married the emperor's nanny Ke Baba, who was the master of Emperor Xizong.In the Qing Dynasty, because the Manchus and Hans did not intermarry, the eunuchs were all Han Chinese, and the court ladies were all Manchu children, so the practice of fake husbands and fake wives was naturally abolished.Therefore, if an eunuch wants to ask for a wife, he can only ask a Han person outside the palace to be his wife in name.Last year, Empress Dowager Cixi announced reforms in Xi'an, one of which was to abolish the regulations prohibiting intermarriage between Manchus and Hans.Therefore, the marriage of Chashuizhang and Yin'er was not only the first marriage between a court lady and a eunuch, but also the first Manchu-Han intermarriage in the palace, so many people came here to watch the excitement. Li Lianying specially sent people to paint the one-story house in Beisan, and repair the leaks on the roof, making it the new house for Chashuizhang and Yin'er.Then, according to the rules of the palace, a lively and lively wedding was held.Yin'er, as Cixi's maid, got on a sedan chair from the back door of Chuxiu Palace, and was carried by the eunuchs all the way to the North Three Office, where Chashuizhang waited to welcome her relatives.In the open space in front of the bungalow, many eunuchs and court ladies, including some elderly mothers, came here to watch the excitement. The eunuchs put braziers and saddles at the door of the one-story house in advance, and when the sedan chair arrived, people handed the bows and arrows prepared in advance to the tea chapter.He drew his bow and set an arrow, and shot an arrow at the top of the sedan chair, and then the maid and mother who saw him off drew up the curtain of the sedan chair, helped Yin'er off the sedan chair, and then Cha Shuizhang picked up Yin'er and stepped over the saddle.At this time, the spectators stood aside, and under the leadership of their mother, they shouted in unison: "Cross the saddle, safe and sound."Astride the saddle and then the brazier.The red charcoal fire was burning in the brazier, and the tea chapter stepped over the brazier, and everyone shouted fire in unison!fire!Amidst the sound of jubilant drums and the shouts of the crowd, Chashuizhang carried Yin'er into the Beisan bungalow. The crowd kept arguing until it was dark, and then they dispersed with lingering enthusiasm. Yin'er was sitting on the edge of the kang with gauze curtains hanging, with a red soft silk head covering on her head.She opened her eyes, and her surroundings were blood red.Just now, listening to everyone's laughter and loud drum music, she felt like a dream, dozed off and couldn't make out anything, and didn't want to make it clear.At this moment, the people dispersed, there was no one in the room, and the surroundings were silent, but her mind was indescribably sober. Yesterday, the aunt who was in charge of Chuxiu Palace told her that, with the grace of Lafayette, not only would he not kill her, but he would propose a marriage for her and let her marry Cha Shuizhang.Although she was shocked in her heart after hearing this, she pretended to be indifferent on the surface.She knew that Lafayette hated her so much that he came up with this trick, and she didn't want her to die so quickly.She spared her life and let her live in order to torture her slowly, just like she did to Master Zhen back then. Aren't you thinking about Rong Qing?Okay, I'll let you think about it slowly. I'll give you a useless man who can't do anything. With this man, you can think about anything. She has already thought about it. No matter how cruel you are, Lafayette , I don't just have one life?This life is in my hands, and I will die at worst.If you don't let me die, I'll show you how to die, just like Master Zhen, after she died, Lafayette not only couldn't treat her anymore, he even sneaked to the mouth of the well to burn incense for her. Cha Shui Zhang walked back and forth in the room, rubbing his hands together.These hands were the best of all accessories on him.The ten fingers are slender, the palms are thin but elastic, and the skin is clean and fair. These are a pair of skillful hands full of wisdom.Because the hands are so elegant, the mouth looks clumsy.He wanted to talk to Yin'er, but he didn't know what to say.The grace of Lafayette pushed him to the cliff where there was no retreat, no, didn't you intercede for Yin'er?Don't you want to help Rong Qing?Well, I will spare Yin'er and let her marry you, see what you say.In this way, not only Yin'er would have doubts, but Rongqing knew that he would take Yin'er's Yin'er away. He knew that he was incomplete, even if it was for Rongqing, he could die.The problem is that Lafayette pointed out a matchmaker for marriage, even if he died, Yin'er would still not be able to be with Rong Qing.Lafayette deliberately made a trick for him to get through, making him an insurmountable obstacle between Yin'er and Rongqing, a pair of deeply affectionate lovers. Yin girl!You go to bed first.He finally spoke. Uncle Zhang, don't you take off my head?Think I'm ugly?she asked. No, no, I'll take it off right now, I'm going to do it for Rong Qing. He hurriedly walked to her side, and was about to reach out to lift the red silk from her head, when Yin'er grabbed his hand. This is a marriage bestowed by Lafayette, do you dare to speak nonsense? You are misunderstood.He withdrew his hand and stood there blankly, not knowing what she meant. I understand better than anything else.She tore off the hood herself, and looked at him calmly. Girl Yin, I'm here for your own good I know that.But you really shouldn't have hurt me in order to save me. Anyway, it's better to be alive than dead.How about honoring the other side Forget about him.What's the point of mentioning this now? You, how can you think like this? Are you forcing me to speak plainly? He stood there, speechless for a long time. Uncle Zhang!Think about it, if you do this, not to mention that I can't be with him alive, even if I die, I can't be buried in their family's cemetery.You cut off all my retreats!The more she spoke, the more excited she became, and two lines of tears rolled down her face unstoppably: Besides, what would he think if you bear such a title? He didn't expect to hurt her deeply by doing so.He swayed his cheeks, his two thick lips were opened up and down, like a fish out of water, unable to make a sound.At that time, Cixi said to spare Yin'er, so he kowtowed to Lafayette.When it comes to the marriage, he thinks very simply.He is a useless person, married her in name, nothing else matters, one day when Rong Qing comes back, he will definitely understand him.In case he never comes back, he and she will move out of the palace in the future, and he will find a way to find a good family for her.He believed that Yin'er would be grateful to him for this. don't cry don't cry!Blame me, blame me for being bad.At that time, I didn't think about it so much, I just thought that if I save my life first, there will always be a way in the future.He advised her not to be sad, while beating her chest and scolding herself for being bad.He told her to wait for a chance in the future, and then ask Lafayette to remove the status of husband and wife for them. It's easy to say, you didn't see that she was trying to punish you and me, but seeing him keep complaining about herself, her heart softened. At that time, I was only thinking that you couldn't die, and I didn't think much about anything else. In short, it was my fault. In fact, this can not blame you.She sighed helplessly. The two sat there, accompanied by the gauze lamp covered with red silk on the kang table, chatting in low voices about the past few years after breaking up.The two talked from Beijing to Wuchang, from Changping to Xi'an, from Rongqing to the emperor, from the emperor to Zhenzhuzi, and from the death of Zhenzhuzi to the situation on the westbound road. On Rongqing's head. Cha Shuizhang knew that Rong Qing was the one who worried Yin'er the most, so he explained in detail how he and Rong Qing drank together that evening, and finally his nephew and son-in-law delivered Rong Qing to Fengtai Station.Don't worry, Yuan Liu didn't leave until he got on the train.If there is a delay, we will arrive in Tianjin before dawn.After hearing what he said about these situations, she was obviously much calmer than before.Unknowingly, the two chatted until late at night.Hearing the sound of clappers in the distance, it was already three o'clock, so he said that it was already late at night, and she was too tired, so he advised her to go to bed and rest. Yin'er was obviously very tired, but she strained her heavy eyelids and wanted to chat with him for a while.For the first time in so many years, she had spoken so much of her heart to others (even with Master Zhen, she didn't dare to open her heart like this, and she could say whatever she wanted).She thought, this was the first time since she entered the palace as a servant, and it was also the last time in her life.She had already thought about her destination in her heart, so she wished she could pour out all the thoughts in her heart.I hope that one day in the future, Uncle Zhang and Rong Qing can meet again and tell Rong Qing about their conversation last night. She lived for him in this life, and even more so for him. Since there is no hope for her, it is too late for her to live any longer. It's not interesting anymore. Time flies so fast, and there is a faint glimmer of gray sky outside the window.Chashui Zhang once again proposed to go to the outhouse to sleep.She pondered for a moment, and finally nodded.He stood up, took a coat, and walked outside.Yin'er watched him walk towards the outer room, followed him to the door, and suddenly called Uncle Zhang!He turned around and looked at the dazed look on her face, as if he had something important to say to him.He stood there waiting.After a long time, she didn't say anything, so let's talk about it tomorrow.He smiled kindly, closed the door and walked out. She leaned on the door panel and looked at the gradually brightening sky outside the window. She took out a piece of rope that she had prepared in advance, threw it lightly on the beam, and tied a knot. She stood on the square stool, holding the rope tightly with both hands, thinking that as long as she put her head into the rope and kicked her feet, everything would be over.Death, perhaps the easiest thing in the world, is also the hardest.Especially at this moment before death, life's instinctive resistance to death, and she left too much hatred and too many shortcomings in this world, she was really unwilling to die like this!No, no, she said to herself in her heart, because of too much hatred, she couldn't face it, and she couldn't change it, especially the last one, so what else could she miss about life? Cha Shui Zhang was sitting in a corner with his coat on, staring at a pair of bloodshot eyeballs, looking at the brighter and brighter sky outside the window, feeling like a mess in his heart.He saved Yin'er, but brought her more trouble.She didn't appreciate him at all, and even blamed him a bit at first.This is something he never thought of, maybe this is the strength of Lafayette.People who don't know the inside story must think that he took advantage of others' danger and got Rongqing's daughter-in-law under the pretext of saving Rongqing's daughter-in-law.No one else said it, even his niece and son-in-law Yuan Liu would probably think the same way. The more he thought about it, the more he felt something was wrong, and the more he thought about it, the more he felt that he had been tricked by Lafayette. If Rong Qing came back suddenly at this moment, how would he explain it to him?Maybe there is only one way, that is, he walks away and vacates this seat to Rong Qing.Beyond that, further explanation would be redundant.To walk here means to die.I don't know why, at the same time as this terrible word popped out of his head, he suddenly remembered the look in Yin'er's eyes when she was standing by the door just now.An instinctive ominous feeling rose from his heart, he climbed up from the corner, rushed to the door, slammed on the door and groaned.He lied to her that the outside room was windy and cold, and asked her to hand him a quilt. When he found that the door bolt had been inserted and there was no movement inside, he immediately panicked and instinctively felt that something had happened.He crouched in the crack of the door and saw nothing but a square stool lying on the ground.In a hurry, he hurriedly picked up the incomplete millstone on the ground next to the door, and slammed it hard against the door. The wooden door, which had been in disrepair for a long time, was not strong at all, and it fell down with the door frame with a slamming sound.In a piece of flying dust, he saw Yin'er's body hanging on the beam of the house.He hurriedly lifted up the wooden stool, climbed up and carried Yin'er off the beam. He laid her flat on the kang, wiped her chest with his hands, and blew and inhaled into her mouth mouth to mouth.After tossing and tossing for a while, she gradually regained her breath, and her complexion also turned from blue to white, and the white gradually became a little fleshy red.He breathed a sigh of relief, put his arm on her head, and slowly fed warm tea into her half-open mouth. Yin'er opened her eyes in a daze, and found herself lying on the kang bed, and Cha Shuizhang was sitting on the square stool beside the bed, staring at her pitifully, her lips trembling slightly, as if she wanted to say something to her. You shouldn't have saved me.It was the first thought that came to her mind when she realized she was still alive.The voice was so faint that even she couldn't hear it clearly, but Cha Shuizhang understood what she meant. No, you shouldn't.He spoke softly, but firmly. I really don't want to live anymore. She touched her neck, feeling that the part that had been strangled by the rope was tight, and she was holding her breath indescribably. In fact, it is easy to want to die, just let go and close your eyes, but it is difficult to live.He put down the tea bowl, and said with deep regret, Rong Qing waited for you in vain?You just leave him alone? Don't lie to me, there won't be such a day.She shook her head in despair. Listen to your Uncle Zhang, one hundred days is cloudy and one day is sunny. Aren’t you both in good health, maybe one day he will come back when he says it, do you think that’s the reason? Whether he comes back or not is another matter. Anyway, Lafayette will never let me go. This time I broke her heart! Isn't there an emperor?Just wait for the rain to clear up! The emperor is not Lafayette's opponent! He smiled and said it was not necessarily true.When the emperor reformed, Lafayette returned to the Forbidden City from the Summer Palace, what kind of energy was that.Tan Sitong was killed, Master Zhen was imprisoned, and the emperor was also placed under house arrest.Not to mention, the establishment of Prince Duan's son as the elder brother is about to abolish the emperor.The results of it?The eldest brother was abolished, and he was exiled to the frontier with King Duan.Not only did the emperor not abolish it, but Lafayette issued an edict in Xi'an to implement reforms throughout the country.In the end, Lafayette also recognized what the emperor did back then. This is called sixty years of feng shui rotation.Since returning from Xi'an, Lafayette's health has deteriorated day by day, and he might let go one day, and he will still be the emperor in the country.When he talked about the past three years, although he said it very euphemistically, the meaning could not be more clear: wait patiently, there will be sunny days after the rain. She widened her eyes, carefully savoring the meaning of his words.She suddenly felt stupid, why didn't she think of this?When she was pregnant with Rong Qing's child, the emperor said that there was a way to protect her, as long as she could survive until the emperor came to power, she would be saved.If Cha Shui Zhang failed to save her in time, she would die if she was going to die, and she would never see Rong Qing again.Thinking of this, there was a tremor in her heart. For some reason, when she crossed the threshold of death and returned to the world, she suddenly felt that death was terrible.If she was allowed to stand on the stool again, she would never have the courage to put her head into the small rope loop.Maybe he's right, sometimes life is harder than death.But there is one thing, as long as she lives, no matter how difficult it is, maybe she can wait until that day, on the contrary, if she dies, this day will be lost forever It has been three years since Rong Qing came to Japan, and Little Gege suddenly came after him. It was a rainy day.Kang Youwei, a member of the royalist party, came here to find him, asking him to join the royalist party and devote himself to establishing a constitutional monarchy headed by Emperor Guangxu.Although he used to be the emperor's bodyguard, he has no interest in politics.The only thing he cares about is Yin'er, and then his family.His father died in prison last year, and his mother moved to the countryside, and her health deteriorated day by day.Thinking of him killing a whole family, including his second uncle, I feel unspeakable guilt.One day he went to a temple in the outskirts of Kobe to burn incense and ask for a lottery. The old abbot with white eyebrows and long beard said that he was haunted by demons. He thought carefully about the experience of these years, and he had to admire the divine calculation of this eminent monk. According to the instructions of the eminent monk, he chanted scriptures and meditated all day long in this typical Japanese wooden house building, trying his best to forget the nightmares of the past.But he still can't forget the past, as long as he closes his eyes, he will see Yin'er smiling at him.However, he was not discouraged. In order to cultivate himself, he still insisted on meditating every afternoon. After sending away the people sent by Kang Youwei, he closed the wooden door of the study and ordered the Japanese maid who served him, no matter who came to him, they would say that he was not there.Just as he closed his eyes and sank into his dantian, suddenly there was a quarrel outside the door.It seemed that someone was clamoring to come in and look for him, and it was a woman.The maid refused to let her in, so the people who came came started arguing.This Japanese servant girl always spoke politely and her voice was not loud, so she only heard the visitor's voice, but did not see her coming in. 他心裡正在疑慮，這兒幾乎沒有什麼相識的女客，就算有那麼一兩位朋友的夫人或女朋友，下女都認識，他氣惱地睜開眼，剛要拉開書房的門，突然愣在那兒。這不是小格格的聲音嗎？when did she come 他剛從門上縮回手，門突然從外面拉開，小格格一臉興奮地站在門口。下女驚慌地站在小格格身後，不知所措地望著他。他想躲也躲不過，只揮揮手讓下女去泡茶，硬著頭皮將小格格帶進客廳。 snort!這個小妖精敢攔著我不讓進來。小格格雙手叉腰，氣呼呼地指著那穿和服的年輕下女，得意地對榮慶說，我早就算準了你躲在裡面，這不，一拿一個準兒。怎麼，你又躲我哪？我是老虎？是不是叫這個小妖精給迷住了？她看一眼榮慶，見他不說話，扯著嗓門又叫起來。 Nothing like that.你不是才來嗎，來之前又沒通知他無奈地笑笑。 你別來這一套，我給你寫了那麼多信，你怎麼連個回音也沒有？she confronted him. 不是怕連累瑞王嗎？他歉意地說。 好了，我別的也不多說了。從頭一次定親到現在，你耽誤我五，六年了。你到武昌我追到武昌，你跑到天津我趕到天津，現在我又追到日本來了，這會兒我再也不走了。她氣呼呼地說完，一屁股坐在榻榻米上。過了一會兒，下女從門廳拎著兩隻大皮箱走進，榮慶這才發現她帶了許多行李。她說火車站還有託運的慢件，看來她真的不打算走了。他望著小格格，面對她近乎瘋狂的追求，他既有些害怕，又非常感動。 見到她，他本能地又想打聽吟兒的情況。想到瑞王罷了軍機處，這幾年專在國外當公使，她一直隨著瑞王在國外跑，對宮裡情況也不甚瞭解，話到嘴邊又忍住。三年多來，他一直沒吟兒消息。他曾給家裡人寫信問過她情況，家裡人隻字不提。自父親進了大牢，母親認定吟兒是他們家災星，別說不知道，就是知道也不會告訴他。 我這來沒別的，就是來跟你結婚，來這兒伺候你。你把那個小妖精趕走，趕明兒我替你做飯。小格格抿了一口日本的清茶，兩眼盯著他，那神情恨不能一口吞了他。 你真的願意跟我過苦日子？ 什麼真的假的，按理我倆早就是夫妻了。她委屈地說，一邊從皮箱裡取出當年光緒親筆寫的喜字，仔細攤在地下，用手抹平上面的折皺，一邊走到他身邊，動情地摟著他肩膀說，你說，咱倆是不是該操辦一下？ 這兒不比國內，規矩不一樣。他被她真情所打動，伸手捉住她涼涼的小手，將她摟在懷裡，下女就不必趕走了，你是格格身分，沒人伺候行嗎？你放心，你想在這兒住多久就住多久。 這叫什麼話兒？不結婚怎麼住一起呀？她不高興地嘟著小嘴。 跟你說了，這兒是國外，規矩不一樣，這兒興同居。同居跟結婚意思差不多，等有一天回國了，你我再補辦婚事！ 慶哥，你不哄我？她抬起那雙好看的大眼睛，眼窩裡濕濕的。 他用那喘著粗氣的大嘴緊緊壓在她嘴上，不讓她說下去。他緊緊接著她嬌小的身體。他感到她單薄的衣服下，那像貓兒一樣柔軟的身子透著溫馨的氣息，在他懷裡微微哆嗦。一股血氣從他夾緊的大腿間往上湧著，腦袋頓時感到一種像醉酒的暈眩和快感。他突然粗魯地將她一把抱起，激動地穿過客廳，登上樓梯，向二樓睡房走去