Chapter 10 chapter Ten

At the Gifted Camp held every summer, gifted students in grades seven through ninth from all over the state get together, and I often picture these gifted students sitting under the trees during the four-week camp, Probe into the brain and try to steal other people's brainchild.I picture campfire parties where they perform oratorios, not just ballads, and when the girls shower together, they rapturously discuss Jacques d Amboise's beautiful figure, or the economist John J.Kenneth.John Kenneth Galbraith's brain structure, not just gossip about other people. But even gifted students have their own cliques, and of all the cliques, science geeks and math goldheads rank highest, socially awkward but most respected.Then there are the historical geniuses, those who know the birthdays and death dates of obscure historical figures, and when they walk past other students, they always whisper something about 1769 to 1821, 1770 to 1831 Years and other seemingly meaningless dates of birth and death, Linxi secretly replied Napoleon and Hegel.

There are also some students who belong to Master Skilled Hands, and everyone has a lot of complaints about these children being listed as gifted students. These children can disassemble the parts and then reassemble them to the millimeter. The whole process does not need instructions or diagrams at all.They understand the world on a practical level rather than a theoretical level, and they don't seem to care much about grades. Samuel is a member of the Handy Masters, whose greatest heroes are the physicist Dr. Richard Feynman (Richard Feynman) and his brother Hall.Hall, a high school dropout, now runs a garage near the sinkhole, and his patrons include hordes of heavy bikers and older gentlemen on their bicycles loitering in nursing home parking lots.Hall smoked, lived in a room above the family's garage, had the privilege of coming in and out of the house, and took various girlfriends to the garage from time to time.

Whenever Hall is asked when he will grow up, Hall always replies: There will never be such a time.Samuel was inspired by his elder brother. Every time the teacher asked him about his future aspirations, he always replied: I don't know, I just turned fourteen. Ruth.Conness knew that Samuel was about to turn fifteen.She used to sit in the tin tool room at the back of the house. Mr. Conness found all kinds of doorknobs and old hardware from the old house that was about to be demolished, and the tool room floor was full of these old things.Ruth sat meditating in the dark tool room and walked home thinking of her headache.Her dad was sitting in the living room reading a book, and she ran across the living room and straight to her room, writing poems in high spirits, with titles like Being Suzie, After Death, Broken Bones, Beside Her, and Lips of the Grave. "The Lips of the Grave" is her most proud work. When she participated in the gifted student training camp, she also carried this poem with her.She read and read, and the folds of the entire page were almost worn out.

On the morning of the gift camp, Ruth had a stomachache and missed the bus to pick up her students, so she had to ask her parents to drive her to the camp.She has been trying a new vegetable and fruit regimen for a while, and the night before, she ate a whole cabbage for dinner.Ruth had been a vegetarian since my death, and Mrs. Conness was not impressed. Christ, this ain't Suzie!Mrs. Conness pointed to the one-inch-thick steak in front of Ruth. Mr. Conness took his daughter to the emergency room at 3 a.m. and drove her to the camp a few hours later.Before they reached the camp, they went home to get their luggage, which Mrs. Conness had packed for Ruth, which was left at the end of the driveway.

The car drove slowly into the camp, and Ruth glanced at the students queuing up to receive their badges, and saw Linxi with the masters of dexterity who were all boys.Instead of writing her name on the name tag, Lindsey just drew a fish on it.She didn't mean to lie, but she hoped to make some new friends from other schools, maybe students from other areas had never heard about me, at least they wouldn't associate her with me. She wore a half heart in gold all spring, and Samuel wore the other half.They were embarrassed to show their love in front of everyone, and they dared not hold hands at school, nor did they exchange love letters.They just had lunch together, and Samuel walked her home from class every day.On her fourteenth birthday, he gave her a cake with a candle in it.Besides, they still spend most of their time with their same-sex friends.

The next morning, Ruth got up very early. Like Lindsay, the two of them had always been alone in the camp and did not belong to any small group.She went for a walk in the forest alone, collecting plants she wanted to name as she walked.She didn't like the names of plants labeled by science geeks, so she decided to name flowers and plants herself.In her diary, she drew the shapes of the leaves and flowers, marked what she believed to be the gender, and then named them. The simple ones were called Jim, and the more flowery ones were called Pansha. Ruth was already in line for a second plate of scrambled eggs and sausage when Lindsey wandered into the dining room.She swears at home that she doesn't eat meat, and it means what she says, but no one in the training camp knows this.

Before I died, Ruth never spoke to Lindsey, and after I passed, they passed each other in the aisles of school, but Ruth saw Lindsey and Samuel walking home together, and she saw Lindsey walk home together. Sy and Samuel were talking and laughing.She watched as Lindsay ordered some pancakes and nothing else.Sometimes she imagined herself as me, and she had imagined herself as Lindsay. Linxi didn't know about this, and walked to Ruth without knowing it.Ruth stops her, what does this fish represent?Ruth pointed to Lindsay's name tag and asked: Are you religious? (Annotation: The fish-shaped pattern symbolizes Christianity.)

No, just look carefully at the direction of the fish head and tail.Linxi said casually, thinking that it would be great if there was vanilla pudding. Vanilla pudding is best served with pancakes. Ruth.Conness, I am a poet.Ruth introduces herself. Lindsay.Lindsay said. Lindsay.Shamon, is it? Please, please don't say it.Lindsay said.For that brief moment, Ruth clearly felt the reaction to the mention of my name.As soon as I was mentioned, people looked at Lindsay and immediately imagined a girl lying in a pool of blood in their minds, and Ruth finally knew what it felt like. Even gifted students who thought they were different formed small groups in just a few days.Most of the small groups in the camp were a country of boys and a country of girls, and the fourteen-year-olds rarely talked about their relationships seriously. The only exceptions that year were Lindsay and Samuel.

Boys and girls kiss!Wherever they go, everyone yells like that.With their parents away and it was midsummer, their passion grew like weeds.I have never felt such pure desire in someone I know, and I have never seen desire grow so fast, let alone this person is my own sister. They interacted cautiously and obeyed the rules of the camp. When the counselor patrolled the house at night and shone a flashlight on the thicker bushes near the boy's camp, he never saw Lindsay and Samuel hiding in the bushes and making love.They met privately behind the restaurant, or secretly by the tree with their initials engraved on it.They kiss, want to go further, but can't.Samuel wanted their first time to be special and perfect, Lindsey just wanted to do it.She wants to have an experience quickly, and then she can really become an adult.She thinks sex is like being on a transport plane in the movie Star Trek, where you disappear into thin air, reappear a second or two later, and find yourself on another planet.

They're almost done.Ruth wrote in her diary.I sincerely hope Ruth writes everything down in her diary where she describes meeting me in the parking lot and she writes that she felt me ​​reach out and touch her that night and it felt absolutely real and not her imagination .She described what I looked like and how I came to her dream. She felt that some ghosts clung to the living, protecting loved ones like a second skin.If she writes hard, maybe she can free my ghost and free herself.I stood behind her and watched her write in her diary, wondering if anyone would believe these words in the future.

When she thought of me, she felt less lonely, as if she had an extra friend somewhere.Somewhere, she has someone who understands herself. In her dream, she saw a cornfield, and a brand new world appeared in front of her; in this new world, she might be able to find her own belonging. Ruth, you are a brilliant poet.She imagined me talking to her.She looked at her diary and daydreamed, her poems were so beautiful in her dreams, the lines were so elegant that I could bring me back from the dead. I recall an afternoon when Ruth was three years old, sitting on the bathroom floor watching her cousin undress for the shower.The cousin was entrusted to take care of Ruth. She carried Ruth into the bathroom so that Ruth would not leave her sight when taking a bath.Ruth wanted to touch her cousin's skin and hair, she really wanted her to hug her.I don't know if it was because of this that Ruth developed some kind of affection in the future.When she was eight years old, Ruth vaguely felt that she was different from other girls, and little girls would be obsessed with certain people around her. Ruth felt that her feelings for her cousin or female teachers were stronger than other little girls' obsessions .She not only wants their attention, but also has a strong desire for them.As the years grow, love gradually sprouts in my heart, and the original green buds bloom into bright crocuses.But, as she said in her diary, she didn't want to have sex with women, but to disappear into their arms forever: she just wanted a place to hide. During the last week of the workshop, participants are usually busy with one last activity.The students of each school must present the results of the activities on the night before the graduation and before the parents come to the camp to pick up the children, and then the judges will judge the winners and losers.Although the theme of the activity was announced on Saturday morning of the last week, the students had already started preparations.The theme of the event has always been to design a mousetrap. No one is willing to repeat the past design, and the difficulty of the event is getting higher and higher. Samuel talked to the kid with the braces, and he needed the little rubber bands on the braces to enhance the effect of the mousetrap. Lindsey asked the retired cook for clean tinfoil, the light reflected from the tinfoil would make the mice dizzy. What if they fell in love with their own reflection?Lindsay asked Samuel. They can't see that clearly.Samuel replied that he found some iron wires for binding garbage bags in the camp, and was busy scraping off the pieces of paper on the wires while talking.If you saw a child staring at an inconspicuous object in the camp that week, the child probably thought how to use it to make the best mousetrap. They're full of cuteness.Lindsay said one afternoon.Lindsay had spent most of the night hunting mice in the fields the night before, and she had put them in an empty rabbit cage. Samuel looked at the mouse thoughtfully and said: Well, being a veterinarian would be nice, but I don't think I'd ever enjoy dissecting a mouse. Do we have to kill them?Lindsay asked: The competition is about who can design the best mousetrap, not who is the best at killing mice. Yati said that he would make a small coffin out of wood.Samuel laughed. too disgusting. Atti is like that. It is said that he likes Suzie.Lindsay said. I know. Did he mention her?Lindsey took a slender stick and threaded it through the wire mesh of the rabbit cage. To be honest, he asked about you.Samuel said. how do you say? I tell you that you are fine, you will live well. The rats in the cage dodged the sticks and ran to the corners, where they piled on top of each other in a futile attempt to escape.Let's design a mousetrap with a purple velvet sofa, and we can put a latch so the mouse sits on the little sofa, and when the door is opened, little cheeseballs fall out.We could name this mousetrap the country of the wild mice. Samuel didn't force Lindsey to talk like the grown-ups did. Instead, he just kept talking about what kind of fabric he was going to use to make the little mouse a sofa. By that summer, I could see people everywhere I went, so I went less and less often to the big balcony on the square.At night, the javelin and shot putters in my paradise are gone, and they're in someone else's paradise, and in other people's paradise, there's no place for a girl like me.Is other people's paradise scary?Do they also look at their relatives and friends in the world like me, do they feel more lonely the more they look at them?Or is someone else's paradise filled with the things I dream about?Maybe everyone else's paradise will always be like a Norman Rockwell painting, where the whole family gathers, there is always a big turkey on the dinner table, and the turkey is cut by a frowning, piercing-eyed man God's uncle or uncle. If you go too far, or think too much, the surrounding scene will change.Looking down, I can see the cornfields, and I can hear the murmur of the stems and leaves in the fields. The vague sound is slightly sad, as if warning me not to cross the line. I had a splitting headache, and it was starting to get dark, and suddenly I was back on the night of the murder, and the memory was coming back, and the feeling was getting heavier and heavier.Many times I have returned to the scene of the murder like this, but I can't see anything clearly. I began to wonder what heaven was, and if it was heaven, my grandparents would be here too, especially my favorite grandfather.He'll be here and hug me, and we'll dance together, and I'll be so happy all day that I won't remember cornfields, graves, or whatever. You can do that, said Fernie: a lot of people are like that. How can we reach that level? Well, it may not be as easy as you think, and you have to give up seeking some answers. I don't know. If you stop asking why you were the one killed and not someone else, don’t think about what everyone would do without you, and don’t care about the feelings of relatives and friends in the world, she said: You will be free.In short, you must leave the world behind. To me, this seems impossible. Ruth sneaks into Lindsay's dormitory at night. I dream about her.she whispered to my sister. Lindsay looked at Ruth sleepily and said: You dreamed of Suzy? That thing in the restaurant this morning, um, I didn't mean it, sorry.Ruth said. Lindsay slept on the bottom of the three-tiered camp bed, and the roommate directly above her rolled over. can i come to your bedRuth asked. Lindsey nodded. Ruth crept quietly into the narrow bed and lay down beside Lindsey. What did you dream about?Lindsay asked in a low voice. Ruth turned over as she spoke, and Lindsey could see the profile of her nose, lips, and forehead.I'm underground, Ruth said: Suzie walks in the cornfield above me, I can feel her walk above me, I want to call her, but my mouth is full of dirt, no matter how loud I call , she still couldn't hear me, and then I woke up. I didn't dream about her, Lindsay said: I had nightmares about rats biting the roots of my hair. Ruth felt comfortable lying next to my sister, and the two of them felt warm next to each other. Are you in love with Samuel? That's right. do you miss suzy It was dark all around, and she could only see Ruth's profile, and Ruth was almost a stranger, so Lindsay honestly said that I missed her more than anyone else. The principal of Diwen Junior High School had something to do with his family and left the camp. Therefore, this year it was the turn of the newly appointed vice principal of Chester High School to plan the theme of the event.She took the task out of the blue and decided to plan an activity other than designing a mousetrap. She hastily put up the event poster: How to escape criminal responsibility?How to commit the perfect murder? The students liked it very much.Music gifted students, poets, historical geniuses, and minor artists discussed how to get started. They wolfed down bacon and scrambled eggs for breakfast, comparing headless koans from the past, and which ordinary utensils are the most effective. Deadly, and they discussed who to murder, and everyone talked happily.At seven fifteen, my sister walked into the restaurant. Artie watched her walk over to the line, feeling the excitement in the air but not knowing why everyone was so excited, she thought the counselors had just announced a mousetrap contest. Artie stared at Lindsay intently. He saw a poster pasted at the end of the buffet table above the table where the tableware was set. A child at the same table was spitting about the story of Jack the Ripper. He listened. Then stand up and return the tray. He walked up to my sister, cleared his throat in a low voice, I put all my hopes on this weird boy, help her, I said, I really hope the world can hear my prayer. Lindsay.Atti said. Lindsay looked at him and said: What's the matter? The chef, standing behind the buffet table, scooped up a large ladleful of scrambled eggs and placed them on Lindsay's plate. My name is Arti, and I'm in the same grade as your sister. I know, I don't need a coffin.Lindsey said as she moved the plate toward the carafe of orange and apple juice. What are you talking about? Samuel told me you're making wooden coffins for little mice, and I don't need that. They changed the competition theme. That morning Lindsey had decided to unbutton the dress that belonged to Clarissa, and it was perfect to decorate the couch in Mousetrap with those buttons. Change it to what? Do you want to go out for a while?Arti stood in front of Linxi, preventing her from going to the place where the dishes were placed, and Linxi, he blurted out: This year's theme is murder. She stared at him intently. Linxi clutched the dinner plate tightly, her eyes fixed on Yati. I'm going to tell you before you see the poster.He said. Samuel rushed into the restaurant. What's wrong?Lindsay looked at Samuel helplessly. This year's theme is How to commit the perfect murder.Samuel said. Both Samuel and I felt the shock, and Lindsay's heart seemed to break into pieces.She had hidden it so well, and the wound in her heart was getting smaller and smaller. After a while, she would be able to hide it from everyone like magic.She shuts the whole world out of her heart, and she doesn't even want to face herself. I'm fine.she says. But Samuel knew that wasn't the truth. He and Yati watched her turn and leave. I've tried to warn her.Atti said weakly. Yati returned to his seat and drew one long needle tube after another. He colored the liquid in the needle tube, and the pen became heavier and heavier. Finally, he drew three dots on the outside of the needle tube, and the whole painting was completed. . Loneliness, I thought, it feels the same on earth as it does in heaven. Killing people with knives, dismembering people's congresses, and shooting people, Ruth said: What a pervert. I agree.Atti said. Samuel took my sister outside to talk, and Artie saw Ruth sitting outside at a picnic table with a blank notebook. But there was a good reason for murder.Ruth said. Who do you think the murderer is?asked Ya, sitting on a bench by the picnic table, with his feet straddling the metal frame beneath it. Ruth sat, barely moving, her legs crossed and one foot dangling constantly. How do you know about this?she asked. My dad told me, Atti said: He called me and my sister into the living room and told us to sit down. Pooh!what did he say? He first said that a terrible thing had happened. My sister immediately mentioned Vietnam, but he didn't say anything because every time Vietnam was mentioned, he and my sister would quarrel.After a while he said: No dear, a terrible thing happened near our house and we all know this man.She thought something had happened to our friend. Ruth felt a drop of rain fall from the sky. And then my dad broke down, he said a little girl was murdered, I asked who the kid was, I mean, he said little girl, I thought it was a kid, you know, younger than us. It was really raining, and the raindrops were falling on the mahogany tabletop. do you want to go inYa asked. Everyone else is inside.Ruth said. I know. Let's get in the rain. They sat upright for a while, watching the raindrops fall all around them, and listening to the raindrops beating on the leaves. I knew she was dead, I felt it, Ruth said: I saw her name in the paper my dad was reading until I knew she was dead.The newspaper didn't mention her name at first, only that it was a fourteen-year-old girl. I asked my father for a newspaper, but he refused to give it to me.Think about it, their sisters didn't come to school for a whole week, could it be someone else? I don't know who told Lindsay?Atti said.When the rain became heavier, he hid under the table and shouted: We will be soaked like rats. The rain came and went quickly, the rain stopped suddenly, the sun was streaming through the treetops, Ruth looked up and looked through the treetops, I think she was listening to us, she whispered, so low that no one could hear See. Everyone at the workshop knew who Lindsay was and how I died.Can you imagine what it feels like to be assassinated?someone said. Thanks, I'd better not know. I thought that would be cool. Come to think of it, she's famous now. What is this famous?I'd rather be famous for winning a Nobel Prize. Does anyone know why the killer came after her? I bet you dare not ask Lindsay. After speaking, the students took their pens and listed the people they knew who had passed away. Grandparents, grandparents, uncles, aunts, some lost their father or mother, and only a few students lost their brothers and sisters. Their brothers and sisters all died of heart problems, leukemia and other terminal illnesses that cannot be named. Passed away, no one you know has ever been murdered, but now I'm on their list. Linxi and Samuel were lying under a dilapidated boat, the hull was too old to float on the water, and Samuel held Linxi in his arms. I'm fine, she said, the tears no longer in her eyes, and I knew Arty wanted to help me, she moved tentatively. Lindsey, come on, he said: Let's just lie here quietly until things calm down. Samuel's back was pressed against the ground, wet from the heavy rain, and he pulled Lindsay closer to him so she wouldn't get wet.As they lay in the small space under the boat, their breaths became more and more rapid, the masculinity in his jeans hardened and he couldn't stop. Lindsey held out her hand. I'm sorry he spoke first. I'm ready.my sister said. Fourteen-year-old Lindsay left me, drifting to a realm I had never been to.The moment I lost my virginity, I was surrounded by panic and blood; the moment Linxi first tasted the clouds and rain, there were bright windows all around. How to commit the perfect murder is an old game in heaven, and I always choose icicles as the murder weapon, because when the icicle melts, the weapon disappears.