Chapter 10 Phosphorescence①

(①Original title: Phosphorescence.) Well, you are so beautiful.You can go directly to the prince to be his bride. Oh, mother, that was a dream! Based on the conversation between the above two people, who is the dreamer and who is the realist? From the speech, it seems that the mother is like a dreamer, while the daughter seems to be the so-called realist who breaks the dream. But in fact, it is precisely because the mother may not believe in the possibility of that dream at all, so she will easily say such a dream. On the contrary, the daughter who is eager to deny it may be full of expectations in her heart, so she hastily Busy to deny.

Although the difference between a realist and a dreamer in this world is as complicated as the above situation, but at this moment, no one else thinks of me that way. I, live in this world.But only a small part of me.In the same way, you, and others, and most of me, must live in a place that other people don't know at all. In my case, for example, for a few hours every day, I live in another world completely separated from this society.Just the few hours I'm asleep.I did see through my eyes a beautiful landscape that is unique on this earth.And still unforgettable. I use this body of mine to wander in the landscape of dreams.And memory itself, is reality?Or a dream in sleep?If the brilliance has not changed, isn't the memory of the dream also a reality for me?

In dreams I have during sleep I have heard the most beautiful words of a friend.And what I responded to him was also the most natural expression of emotion.In addition, in the dream I had during sleep, I heard her tell the truth from the woman I had been thinking about day and night, that I started like this.So I, even when I woke up from my sleep, still believed in it as my reality. dreamer. Those people like me seem to be labeled by many people as dreamers, as innocent aliens, they laugh at us, they scorn us, but in the face of those who are laughing, even You who are smiling are like a dream to me.What kind of expressions will those people have on their faces when they hear such words?

I grow up and grow old in my sleep eight hours a day.In other words, this I does not exist in the so-called reality of this world, because this I is a man who grew up in the reality of another world. I have a best friend who doesn't exist anywhere in this world.And, that good friend is very real and alive.And a wife who doesn't exist anywhere in this world.And that wife, who can read and speak, possesses a physical body, and lives very truly. I woke up with my eyes open, and while washing my face, I felt the fragrance of that wife close by.So, when I went to bed at night, I still held the expectation that I could meet that wife.

I haven't seen you for a long time. What's the matter? I'm off to pick cherries. Do you have cherries in winter? at Switzerland. That's it. There is neither appetite nor sexual desire, nothing, and the cold love words continue in the dream. I have dreamed of such a picture several times before.However, my husband and I have also been lying on the lakeside grassland that absolutely does not exist on the earth. Very unhappy, right? Fool!Everyone is stupid! I shed tears. Just then, woke up.I was in tears.Dreams and reality are linked during sleep.Moods are also connected intact.Therefore, I think that the reality of this world for me also includes the continuation of dreams in sleep, and the dreams in sleep also include my real world.

Seeing only my real life in this world, it is impossible for other people to understand all of me.At the same time, I have no way of understanding the inner world of other people. According to Freud's theory, dreams seem to be the product of all the suggestions given by this real world.I rather think that's a fallacy that confuses mother and daughter.Although dreams are connected with reality, they are still different in nature and should be regarded as another world unfolding to us. My dream is connected to reality, reality is the continuation of dream, even so, the atmosphere is still completely different.The tears shed in the kingdom of dreams are connected with this real world, I still shed tears unwillingly, but when I think about it carefully, the tears shed in the kingdom of dreams, I feel more real.

For example, one night, something like this happened. My wife who kept appearing in my dream said to me: Do you know what is called justice? He asked in a tone of confidence that he was not joking. I didn't answer. You know what's called masculinity? I didn't answer. Do you know the so-called incorruptibility? I didn't answer. Do you know what is called love? I didn't answer. It was still the same scene, we were lying on the non-existent lakeside grassland, and I was crying. Suddenly, a bird flew over.The bird, which resembled a bat, had a single wing about three meters long, and its wings were unmoved, like a glider, flying silently at a low altitude about two meters above us.Then, like the cry of a crow, it said thus:

It's okay to cry here, but don't cry about those things in that world! Since then, my thoughts have gradually become that people live in this real world and another dream world in sleep, living in these two worlds, mixing two life experiences, isn't it the so-called whole life ? Sayona. Say goodbye to the real world. Meet in a dream. Uncle came over just now, sorry. Has that uncle gone back yet? I told him to take me to the theater, but he wasn't listening!I heard that at the press conference where Hazaemon and Meiyuki succeeded their teachers, this time Hazaemon looks more personable than the previous Hazaemon, with a fresh and lovely image, and his voice is nice, and his acting skills are also very good. Great, it will not lose to the previous generation Hanzaemon at all.

Even then.Frankly speaking, I still like the former Hanaemon very much. After that person passed away, my interest declined to the point where I couldn't even get up to watch Kabuki.However, compared to that, the more beautiful Hazaemon has appeared on stage, even I want to go to see her, why didn't you go? Military jeeps came by. Military jeeps? Yes, I got a bouquet of flowers. This is lily, right? No yeah. Because I don't know the name of the flower, I tried to break out a long list of foreign scientific names as difficult as Phosphorescence (phosphorescence).I am ashamed that my linguistics is so poor.

I heard that in the United States there are also spiritual sacrifices.The man said so. Is this the flower of the Spiritual Festival? The man didn't answer. Has become an anonymous person in the cemetery, so sad.I lost weight for it. I don't know what to say?Whatever you like is fine, just tell him. Say goodbye. Farewell, will we meet again? In another world. After that person finished speaking, I thought, ah, this is reality.Even if we bid farewell in the real world, I will meet this person again in the dream world of sleep. I thought about it, and my mood suddenly became brighter.

So, when I wake up in the morning, the farewell is what happened in the real world, and the meeting is what happened in the dream world, and then again, the farewell is still what happened in the dream world, no matter which side I feel the same, I don't care anymore.I was in a daze on the bed, and the editor of a certain magazine came to my house to collect the manuscript, because it was agreed that today was the deadline. I still can't even write a piece of manuscript paper, please forgive me.Please wait until the next issue of the magazine, or when there are two issues of the magazine, then ask me to write.I begged so, but the other party couldn't listen.Whether it is five or ten today, I have to hand in the manuscript, otherwise it will be a headache.I also made it clear to the other party, no, I am also very hurt. How about this.Next, we'll have a drink and you'll dictate what I'll write. I can hardly resist the temptation of wine. The editor and I went out together and went to an oden restaurant I was familiar with, and asked the boss to lend us a quiet room on the second floor. That day happened to be June 1. From that day on, it was said that all the restaurants were closed on their own, so the boss said It was not very convenient to rent it to us, so I declined.If this is the case, do you have any wine that has not been sold out before that you can give us?So the boss sold us a liter of Japanese sake, and the two of us walked around the countryside in early summer with the one-liter bottle. Suddenly, it occurred to me that I could walk to that person's residence.I used to hang out in front of that person's house a lot.However, I haven't been in yet.I have met that person several times on other occasions. That person's home, which is quite spacious and has a small family, must have at least one vacant room. Because our family has many children, it is too noisy, and it is difficult to concentrate on doing things. Besides, once there are guests visiting at home, it is also very troublesome. It happens that there are friends nearby, so why not go to her to work. Even such a thing has to make up an excuse, and maybe never see that person again. I mustered up the courage to press the doorbell.The maid came out to answer the door, and she said: The person you are looking for is not at home right now. Are you going to the theater? Yes. I lied.No, that's not a lie.For me, I'm speaking the truth. That said, will be right back.Not long ago, I just met my uncle, who said that she was dragged onto the stage, but escaped halfway, and laughed. The maid should think that I am an acquaintance, and welcome me into the room with a smile. We were led into the man's living room.On the front wall, there are pictures of young men.Those who don't even have a grave are so pitiful.I realized it in this instant. Is it the master? Well, I haven't returned from Nanyang yet.It has been seven years, and there is no news at all. That person actually had such a husband. In fact, I only found out at that moment. beautiful flowers. Said the young editor, seeing a bouquet of flowers adorning the table below that photo. What kind of flower is it? When asked by him, I answered him fluently: Phosphorescence (phosphorescence flower).