Chapter 3 Part Three: People on High Hill

On the day of the move, a strong westerly wind blew. when, when, when The alarm bell of the railway level crossing came flickeringly with the wind from afar. Stretch out your head from the balcony, you can see the railway line of Gaogang Xiaxiaotian Express Line.The trains seem to be busier than expected.This has been noticed when looking at the house with the real estate agent.However, because the house is located on a high hill, there is still a distance from the railway, so the sound of the train is not so harsh. When, when, when.Zhuo Er sat down on the cardboard box full of books, imitating the sound of the railway level crossing alarm bell.

Seems like there's a railway level crossing nearby, huh?Chun Hai rubbed his stiff shoulders, and asked as if talking to himself.She was wearing overalls and a navy blue sweater with slightly rolled-up sleeves. She looked refreshed and worked very quickly.There was a slight blush on her cheeks, and it was impossible to tell from the slender waist that she was already the mother of two children. Well, there must be a level crossing.Zhuo Er's answer was almost the same as no answer.He was carefully folding the paper under the bookcase. This is a three-story apartment. Zhuo Er's family is on the east side of the third floor. It is a house with three bedrooms and two living rooms.

The children were also assigned their own rooms.My older sister, Minhye, is in fifth grade, and my younger brother, Yangyi, is in third grade.Although such a young child has his own room, it seems a bit luxurious, but they can't always be elementary school students, people have to grow up.Sooner or later they will need their own room, and buying a new house by then is not realistic.Even if you plan for a short term, you have to live here for ten or fifteen years.In fact, speaking from the bottom of my heart, this may be my residence for the rest of my life, at least Zhuo Er thinks so.With such psychological preparation, Zhuo Er spent enough time when choosing a house, trying to choose the best house within his ability to meet the needs of each family member as much as possible.

A house is the most important commodity you will buy in your life. Chunhai had a certain amount of savings, as well as stocks inherited from her natal family, which played a decisive role in key areas.The so-called key place refers to buying at least a little bit of a house that is a little bigger and more convenient.When registering the property rights of the house, the husband and wife each have half. The banker said it. What did you say? In most families, the husband dies first, so when registering property rights, it is better to have more of the wife's property. Um.Zhuo Er didn't raise any objection, although he didn't think about it seriously.

I'm afraid I do die first. Zhuo Er thought so.In terms of age, Zhuoer is five years older than his wife Chunhai, and in reality, the average life expectancy of women is longer than that of men. In order to buy this house, Zhuo Er has borrowed money from the bank, and it will take twenty years to pay off the money.For a long time, Zhuo Er didn't like the feeling of being in debt, as if suffering from an eye disease, he always felt foggy when looking ahead.If you borrow money, once you get the money, you have to bear the psychological burden of having to pay it back.As long as the family's overall income and expenditure calculation is a negative number, Zhuo Er will not be able to feel the joy of income.Zhuo Er didn't feel any joy when paying salary, bonus, or even winning the lottery.Maybe it's because the tolerance is not broad enough, both father and mother have this kind of personality.Because the loan from the bank is not a small amount, Zhuoer's family has been living beyond their means.

What a bliss it will be to be freed from the burden of debt repayment twenty years later! Then you can sit in the bathtub and drink leisurely But wait! By that day, Zhuo Er should be in his sixties. He has already completed half of his life and is about to enter his twilight years.I'm afraid it's not good for people to be in a state of anxious waiting all day long. What a life's work! What? Own a home. Chun Hai, the wife who was busy arranging things, didn't show too much interest in Zhuo Er's banter.While arranging the tableware in the kitchen closet, Chunhai snorted twice to show his answer to Zhuo Er.

She looks so happy. Although there was no bright smile on her face, her wife's face did shine. Since Zhuo Er's new home was built on a high hill, there were no tall buildings nearby.Standing on the balcony, although the view is not wide, the scenery of the street below is still panoramic. There is a small park next to the railway line.Shouts for toilet paper can be heard from upstairs.There is a shortcut to the station over there.In the evening, small vendors who set up stalls selling barbecue and ramen came out to do business with their carts. From nowhere, a hydrogen balloon floated with the wind.At the same time, Dang, Dang, Dang, the alarm bell of the railway level crossing came again.

It finally looks like a room.Haruhi said while sitting on the tatami in the bedroom. Don't rush to clean up, you will be exhausted. Yes, what I have to do now is to move all the things here, and tidy up bit by bit later. It was past five o'clock when Minhui and Yangyi got home.The two children have to go to school, and it would be difficult to bring them around, so Zhuo Er asked them to go to a classmate's house to play after school, and then return to their new home at 3:30. Long live!Seeing the beautiful new home, the elder sister Minhui cried out happily, and the younger brother Yangyi also cried out: Long live!Long live!Two children ran up and down the corridor waving their little hands.

Where is my room? And mine? Min Hye's room is here, Yang Yi's is that one.You can clean it yourself later. Before Dad finished speaking, they had already cheered and ran into their own room, and soon ran out again, and began to visit each other's room, and carefully checked every corner to see if the distribution of parents was fair.In fact, except for the different lighting, the size and structure of the two rooms are almost the same. Even the colors of the curtains were specially selected by their parents. Minhui’s room curtains are pink, which girls like, and Yangyi’s It is light blue.It looked like both kids were happy with the room.

Are you being nice on the train today? good! With the help of their father, the children unpacked their luggage. I'm exhausted from all the work I've done today.Although Chunhai complained several times, he couldn't stop.After resting against the wall for four or five minutes, I got up again and began to organize my belongings. There is no end to work. Yes, I will take a break after working for a while. Zhuo Er roughly sorted out his belongings and went to take a bath with Yang Yi.For a house like Zhuoer's, the bathroom is relatively spacious.Stretching his body in the warm bath water, a sense of satisfaction spread in Zhuo Er's heart.

This feeling has been experienced before. When I got my college acceptance letter, the night I got engaged Zhuo Er came out of the bathtub and asked Min Hui: Do you want to wash it? I wash alone.Min Hye is already in the fifth grade and has stopped washing with her dad since a few months ago. Then come quickly, I'm done washing. Zhuo Er glanced at Min Hui's room, and Min Hui had tidied the room in order, it really looked like a girl's room. After living in a new house, no matter what kind of house it is, I always feel that it would be nice to have one more room. People are always dissatisfied.Let's talk about something more important, I said madam, what about our supper? I don't feel like cooking after a tiring day.Let's go out and eat at a restaurant near the station. Ok, there is a Chinese restaurant there, and the food tastes very good. Have you tried it? Ah, I ate there by the way when I was looking at the house a while ago. Well, you decide. After Min Hye took a shower, the family went out. It takes seven or eight minutes to walk downhill from home to the station, and the slope is very gentle.The family sat around the table in the Chinese restaurant, Chunhai poured a glass of beer for her husband, and poured a glass for herself. Come, have a toast! Thank you for your hard work today! Then there was the crisp sound of glasses clinking. The taste of the fried rice is neither good nor bad.After eating, in order to get acquainted with the surrounding environment as soon as possible, and know where there are restaurants that cook delicious meals and where there are shops selling cheap items, the family decided to take a walk nearby to draw a topographic map of the neighborhood in their minds. How about we go a little further to help with digestion? Then what? At most three or four hundred meters.There should be a railway level crossing on the opposite side, and I think there must be a way home from there. Um Chun Hai didn't particularly object, and the children were already running towards the road along the railway line. On the small road under the elevated iron bridge, the smell of chicken wafted from the grilled chicken stall, and the glass windows of the chowder shop were quietly closed, with only yellow lights shining through. It seemed that there were already a few customers. Is there a car factory nearby? Um.It's quite lively here in the evening, with more people than I imagined. Not far ahead is the railway level crossing with sirens, which is difficult to see in the downtown area of ​​the city. When people can't see the train, the siren starts to sound the siren, which can be transmitted to a long distance, and the flashing red light is a signal to notify danger.At this time, the long bamboo pole used as a breaker had been put down, and with the low groan of the rails, the train suddenly appeared. This scene evokes people's nostalgia for their childhood hometown.The children also stared wide-eyed at the speeding train. OK, let's go. As expected, there is indeed a slope leading to Gaogang from the railway level crossing.This not-too-high hill is lush with vegetation, and the area is submerged in darkness.On the way up the hill, the lights of the residential area were faintly visible. That slope is our home. Min Hye, you forgot to turn off the bathroom light, didn't you? I turned it off. But look, it's on. It must have been the reflection of the corridor lights. Where is the reflection so bright. There were still very few residents in the apartment building where Zhuo Er's family lived. Only a corner of the third floor had a faint light, and the rest of the place was still shrouded in silence and darkness.So the lighting of the home makes people feel very friendly. Tomorrow you two have to take the tram to school Before the end of the second semester, Minhui and Yangyi still have to study in the original school, because they moved, the children have to take a long tram to go to school every day. Catch the romping children to bed, and the couple can finally breathe a sigh of relief.Looking up at the watch, it was almost eleven o'clock. Let's go to bed early too. Well, I'm going to take a shower first. If you are tired all day, you should take a good soak. The bathtub is very comfortable and can relieve fatigue. Listening to the sound of water in the bathroom, Zhuo Er felt a little drowsy and dozed off unknowingly.When I woke up again, the TV by the bed was still on. Zhuo Er got off the bed to go to the bathroom, and when he came back, he smelled the fragrance from his wife's skin.Chun Hai in the bathtub closed his eyes and stretched his body, enjoying the comfort of the warm bath water. In memory, tonight I have to have my wife A solemn impulse welled up in Zhuo Er's heart. Maybe it has no meaning, just a stupid ritual, for this house bought with a loan, the house that is not spacious enough to live in as a human being, if an earthquake occurs, it may be wiped out in an instant. But, no matter what, this is our home now. Tonight, my wife's body is more moist than ever.Perhaps Haruhi was still soaking in the bathtub surrounded by a kind of excitement that came from nowhere.Because it's their new home, a once-in-a-lifetime high-ticket purchase. Zhuo Er's hand reached out to his wife's plump and soft breasts, and Chun Hai's body trembled like an electric shock.Suddenly, a joy like a warm current surged in his body like a river breaking its embankment, his whole body turned into rippling waves, and thin, long, gossamer-like breaths swayed from Chunhai's mouth. The depths of Chunhai's body gradually swelled under the impact of a wave, and then slowly tightened. Such subtle touches came over and over again, and Chunhai tightly surrounded Zhuo Er, which was an indescribable pleasure. Zhuo Er pumped like a wave, but at the same time, he was thinking wildly in his mind.When making love, a man can't devote himself wholeheartedly. If he bury his head in it, it will be over soon.So a certain part has to be kept awake. Chun Hai and I have been married for fifteen years.What is the fifteenth year of marriage called? In the past fifteen years, it's not that Zhuo Er has never had contact with other women.I used to have a very close relationship with a certain female colleague in the company; I also got close to prostitutes in drinking places; I also had a one-night stand when I was on a business trip.Chun Hai didn't know about these things at all, and he didn't notice them at all.If there are any clues to make her doubt, she herself will firmly deny: Zhuo Er can't be that kind of person. Am I acting in breach of trust?Well, it does. A kind of idea of ​​raising a flag to rebel swayed in the depths of Zhuo Er's chaotic mind, every time he had sex with Chun Hai, he would think this way. No woman can catch up with Chunhai. Whether it's the depth of pleasure or the subtle changes inside the body If Zhuo Er hadn't had sex with other women, maybe he couldn't correctly evaluate the benefits of his wife.There was even a period of time when Zhuo Er was stroking the bodies of other women, he would repeatedly think in his mind: Is my feeling for Chun Hai true?is that true? The result of the deviance made Zhuo Er's love for Chun Hai deepen instead.Deep in Chunhai's heart is not only tenderness, but also other strengths that no one can understand. I'm afraid Chunhai himself doesn't understand these strengths very well, how can he praise her?Who should praise her?These strengths that cannot be praised in words will suddenly jump into Zhuo Er's mind inadvertently, making a smile appear on his cheek.Tonight's Chunhai feels dizzy again and again on the wave of pleasure. Haruhi, you have worked hard!The move can be completed smoothly, thanks to you.In the future, our life will gradually get better than before, you have to work hard!I will work hard too. In the silent night, the alarm bell of the railway level crossing spread farther and more clearly. new house.good wife.What did the children dream about? Zhuo Er turned off the desk lamp, darkness spread in the room, closed his eyes, but in the back of his mind, there was the light reflected in the window that he saw on the way back just now, what a warm and soft light it was! Zhuo Er's mother was weak and sick, and died when Zhuo Er was twenty-three years old. As a result, only his father and Zhuo Er were left to depend on each other. My father was a salesman for a plastic products company. Because he had to entertain customers, he would go home late at least three nights a week.Father once considered remarrying, but because Zhuo Er didn't like the new mother, so father didn't remarry. No matter how late he came back at night, his father would get up early the next morning to prepare meals for the two of them, from breakfast, lunch box, to dinner. Don't run around after school, be careful with fire when heating meals, and don't forget to bring your keys. At that time, Takuji and his father lived in a public apartment in Yono City, Saitama Prefecture. After watching his father go out from the back, Zhuo Er began to live alone every day. Zhuo Er ate breakfast while watching TV, and left for school after checking the time. After school, I have to participate in the training of the basketball team, so it is not too early to go home in the afternoon.If one day the basketball team doesn't organize training for some reason, Zhuo Er will feel at a loss. After returning home, while eating snacks, he put the dishes that his father had prepared in the morning on the fire to heat up, and then steamed the cold rice thoroughly in a steamer. Urawa City, which can be reached by bicycle for ten minutes, lives with my aunt and cousin's family.Zhuo Er would occasionally go to his aunt's house, but his cousin was several years older than him, so she was not a suitable chat partner, so it was better to stay at home by herself. Being alone at home, Zhuo Er didn't feel so lonely.When I was in elementary school, my mother was weak and sick, and hospitalization was a common occurrence.It can be said that Zhuo Er basically grew up alone, which cultivated his ability to live alone and also honed his will to endure loneliness. Zhuo Er's family has a bathtub, but he finds it troublesome to boil the bath water, because he does not lack boring time.On nights when there were no good programs on TV, Zhuo Er would go to the bathhouse on the street to take a bath.It's only a ten-minute walk from home to the bathhouse, so as long as it doesn't rain, it's very convenient to go to the bathhouse to take a bath. At night, all kinds of people gather in the bathhouse, which is very lively.There are men covered in tattoos, and child laborers washing dishes in restaurants. Although Zhuo Er has been fond of bathing since he was very young, but he likes to go to public bathhouses so much, perhaps because of his lively disposition hidden deep in his heart. Bar. Soaking in the bathtub, Zhuo Er killed the time like playing.After leaving the bathhouse, I bought a string of stewed chowder at a street stall, and walked towards home while slowly tasting the chowder in my hand. On the way home, there is a residential area on the high hill on the right, where a friend of Zhuo Er lives.At night, the lights of a friend's house are on like a sign.This friend is called Unino, and he and Zhuo Er were very close when they were in elementary school, but after being admitted to middle school, because Zhuo Er had to participate in the basketball team training, so the time to play with Uno became less, and the two of them were not around. The same class, so gradually alienated.But every time Zhuo Er walks this way home at night, he always thinks of this old friend. I even went to his house to play once. No, when it comes to going to his house to play more than once or twice, ten or dozens of times.But what impressed Zhuo Er most deeply was the winter vacation in the year he graduated from elementary school. There is a large fireplace in the center of the living room of the Uno family, and the light in the room is a bit dazzling.Unino is the youngest of the four children. It was at that time that Zhuo Er met Unano's eldest brother who was studying in university.His two older sisters were about the same age as him, Zhuo Er had only met them before, but he was not familiar with them, and when he met them on the street, he would pass by as if he hadn't seen them. When the whole family sits around the fire, the favorite thing to do is to play poker.Basins were filled with citrus, and between games the siblings would playfully toss each other and munch happily. Come and play too. Um When it comes to poker, Zhuo Er has only played Solitaire and Qi Qi two simple games before, and the Uno family's games seem to be very different from these two games. Seeing Zhuo Er's hesitation, the eldest brother who is in college sent an invitation: I will teach you, let's play together. Zhuo Er couldn't remember the name of that kind of game, but only remembered that there was a saying like plus ten or minus five. Unino likes to act like a baby and pretend to be a child in front of the whole family. At this time, his mother will say: Look at how stable Zhuo Erjun is, and how much he looks like a big child. In Zhuo Er's heart, he also commented on this friend: What did this guy do? He's still acting like a spoiled child at such a big age. The image of a family and harmony reflects a certain weakness. Still basketball is more of a man's game. Thinking about it later, this kind of thinking may just be my own stubbornness. The lights on the high hill that I saw from the night road must have come from the living room with the big fireplace.Every time on the way home from the bathhouse, Zhuo Er would always look up at the light. Even so, Takuji didn't have any special thoughts almost all nights.The thoughts that go through your mind when you see lights are very simple: the light is on. That's all, and it's gone.Zhuo Er was not even particularly aware of the existence of lights. However, when the breath of autumn approached quietly, one day, the color of the light also unknowingly infected Zhuo Er's heart. That guy Unino, is he still as spoiled as before! It seems that Uno has recently started to learn to play the guitar. He is a middle school student, but it has been a long time since he grows tall, and he always looks like a child. I'm different from that guy! Although Zhuo Er often looked down on Unino, the dazzling lights of his house and the atmosphere of the whole family sitting in the living room produced a subtle shock in Zhuo Er's heart. For Zhuo Er, he has never experienced a decent family life.However, he could feel his father's proper love, and he never expected anything extravagantly.In the pure and somewhat stubborn heart of the boy, he always thought that his father married a new wife because he was sorry for his dead mother.Therefore, he had to bite the bullet and tell himself that he couldn't be dissatisfied with his current life. However, he couldn't help but keep in mind the window that radiated warm light.In Zhuo Er's view, maybe it is a window leading to an unknown and beautiful world. In such a night, Zhuo Er could only walk desperately on the road. After walking away, Zhuo Er would suddenly turn his head and look in the direction of the window as if he encountered something terrible.The light from the window has become very small and small, but it is still warm and shines more sharply. After Zhuo Er was admitted to university, he left Yono City.After graduating from university, he worked in an iron factory. Two years later, his father passed away in an accident. In this world, Zhuo Er lost his last relative. Zhuo Er met Chun Hai through a friend's introduction, and her family is not a big family with many relatives. It's nice to have a big family with many people living together! It's very troublesome. Now it's different from before. First, everyone has to go to work, and there are not so many people to take care of the family. Second, the education expenses of the children are also a problem. For office workers, there is not much hope for a lively extended family.A daughter and a son are already very content, and they have to work hard for it. After Takuji left Yonoichi's house, he would occasionally stare blankly at the light from the distant window in the dark.Whenever this happens, although it can't be said to be sad, but if there is any feeling, Zhuo Er will feel his throat a little swollen, a feeling that he can't breathe. More than ten years later, Zhuo Er and Chun Hai began to look for a house suitable for their family of four, which might be their lifetime residence. Not bad. I love the house here. Choosing a house on Gaogang, you can still hear the sound of the railway level crossing siren from a distance. I am afraid that this has a lot to do with Zhuo Er's emotion one night when he was a teenager. After moving here, if you look at the high hill from the small road along the railway line at night, you can see the warm and bright light from the window on the corner of the third floor. On the way to the station, there are three small restaurants where you can drink: a rotisserie chicken shop, a chowder shop and a ramen restaurant.To say they are restaurants is a bit of an exaggeration, but in fact they are just roadside stalls set up for business.The shed of the ramen restaurant is made of cloth, and there are some oil stains on it, but because the surrounding is very tight, it is quite warm inside.There are quite a few guests sitting on benches drinking. It has been more than a month since we moved into our new home, and Zhuo Er occasionally shows up in these small restaurants.There are few restaurants on the nearby streets, and even fewer are open for business at night.McDonald's and KFC don't suit the taste of oriental people. Although the restaurants on this road are not very clean, the taste is very authentic, especially the grilled chicken restaurant. Although it doesn't even have a name, the grilled chicken But it is a delicacy that cannot be tasted in any high-end restaurant.The grilled chicken liver tastes very delicious, and the cells seem to be alive; the grilled chicken gizzards are chewy and chewy; the salt-roasted chicken skin melts like butter without chewing. During the period of seven o'clock, there are even customers waiting in line outside the store to taste. That rotisserie chicken place is really nice. Not interested in!Such a dirty store.Chun Hai frowned. In order to buy a house, Zhuoer's family borrowed a lot of money from the bank, so Zhuoer's current status is not suitable for drinking high-end wine.So after coming back from overtime, drinking two or three glasses of soju in a small restaurant near my home is an appropriate enjoyment.Long tables full of cigarette butt burns, and round stools of uneven heights. Guests drink wine in their glasses alone with different expressions. If there is a major earthquake in Tokyo, it is estimated that half of the people will die.Unlike the past, a chattering guest came this day. Since the next day was the anniversary of the founding of the children's school, there was a holiday, so Haruhi took the children back to their natal home in Chiba County to play.I heard that a Disneyland has recently been built near my grandma's house, so the children have long clamored to go to play. Zhuo Er returned to the home where he was the only one left, took a shower and then went straight to the small restaurant under Gao Gang. Don't worry about anything tonight, you can open up and drink. On nights when family members are waiting at home, drinking is always apprehensive, so Zhuoer usually only limits himself to three drinks. But there are still people waiting! Now think about it, an empty house with no family waiting is so bleak, especially a new home, because it was originally bought for the family Although when I was young, no matter when the house was so deserted. On the slope from home to the small restaurant, Zhuo Er was thinking blankly.But when he sat down on the chair in the small restaurant, the light in the room alone made the bleak thought just hide in a corner of his mind. There are still places to escape in the suburbs like ours. If it is in the center of Tokyo or in the subway, it will be over in one fell swoop. ah!The original earthquake topic is still going on. Zhuo Er had already drank five cups, and from the third cup onwards, the ecstasy drunkenness had hit him unknowingly, and Zhuo Er felt extremely comfortable physically and mentally.However, Zhuo Er didn't drink much, five glasses was considered a limit, if he drank another one or two, he would have to be very drunk. Looking back, it seems that I haven't been drunk for a long time recently. How about two more drinks? A warm sense of happiness welled up in Zhuo Er's brain, although it was not so specific and clear, it was a real feeling.What is it that makes you happy? Ah, yes!Because I have a family, and my family is healthy and happy.Today is the blessing wine that I drink for this family alone. Zhuo Er's body shook slightly, seeing the guests around him, he thought: What are they drinking here for tonight? Another birthday, I will be seventy years old! Zhuo Er's dazed mind began to complain about the acoustics of the small restaurant, why the voices of the neighbors could not be heard clearly, but the voices of the distant guests echoed in his ears.It seems that the topic of earthquakes is over. Chunhai, are they all right? Do you have to take the subway to go to Disneyland?It's not just the subway that's dangerous The shopkeeper took out the meat skewers from the refrigerator and said, "Seventy old." Ancient and rare, ancient and rare.At this age, if there is only one person left to live, the old man said in a low voice while shaking his head back and forth, as if he was listening to himself.Due to drinking a lot of wine, the old man's cheeks were flushed. Shopkeeper, have another drink!Zhuo Er drank the wine in the glass in one gulp, and then raised the glass to the air. come!come! There is also a layer of wine measuring container outside the cup. The shopkeeper deliberately pours more wine when pouring, so that the wine overflows from the cup and flows into the outer measuring cup.I don't know who started this habit, anyway, hotels have had this kind of service since a long time ago.After drinking the wine in the glass, the guest may be happy to see that there is still a little in the measuring glass. Go home after drinking this glass. Zhuo Er stuffed the last skewer of grilled chicken into his mouth, followed by another half glass of wine. What about doing the laundry? What else to do, just wash it yourself. The conversation between the shopkeeper and the old man continued. My wife is ten years younger than me and has two children, but they are all ahead of me These words were clearly sent to Zhuo Er's ears through the air full of oily smoke. A subtle sense of fear sneaked into Zhuo Er's heart, he tried his best to concentrate on the distracted alcohol, thinking about the reason of this fear. Where does the fear come from? Among my family members, I am afraid that I should be the first to die. Chunhai is five years younger than me, and it is not uncommon for children to die before their parents. However, it cannot be said that everything is possible in this world. Shopkeeper, settle the score!There is still a little wine in the glass. OK, here we come. Zhuo Er drank the last drop of wine in his glass, paid the bill and went out. The cold November wind poured down his collar into his chest and back, and Zhuo Er shivered.Under the influence of alcohol, he felt that everything around him was shaking. There is a small park along the railway line, Zhuo Er sat on a stone bench in the park, looked up and saw Gao Gangshang's own home.Yellow lights shot from the four windows, and I probably forgot to turn off the bathroom light again. The cold wind stung Zhuo Er's eyes, tears seeped into his eye sockets, and his body trembled.But the shivering was not from the cold. How should I put it? Feeling about the future, the unpredictable future filled Takuji's heart with a strong sense of reality. Drunk man on park bench, lights from distant windows At some time before, I must have stared at that window from a distance in a daze. Chunhai is dead, the children are gone, Minhui and Yangyi are all dead, and the house is sold.I lived a life of endless wandering, and I was so old that I didn't even recognize it. The pain of all this can only be escaped by getting drunk. Once, I also had a happy life. While looking at the lights of the windows in the distance while speaking such lines, Zhuo Er had a premonition that this day might really come.Surrounded by a wonderful sense of reality, Zhuo Er silently shed tears in the wind Once, I also had a happy life.he said to himself.