Chapter 30 Sixth and fifth techniques: self-deprecating contingency tricks

Self-deprecating, or self-deprecating for short.On the surface, it seems to be mocking oneself, but in fact, the drunkard's intention is not to drink. It contains a deep meaning and a different charm. It has a special emergency response when the conversation is in a difficult situation. In the early 1950s, President Truman of the United States summoned General MacArthur for some reason.During the meeting, MacArthur appeared very arrogant. He took out his pipe, filled it with shredded tobacco, put the pipe on the corner of his mouth, fetched a match, and when he was about to light it, he stopped and said to Truman:

You don't mind if I smoke, do you? Truman knew that this was obviously not MacArthur's sincere request for advice, because he had already prepared the smoke and fire.Embarrassed by this impolite arrogance, Truman resorted to a contingency trick of self-mockery. Truman glanced at MacArthur, and deliberately said with self-deprecation: smoke it!General, more smoke has been sprayed in my face than that of any American. Truman's self-mockery was just right, which protected the embarrassing psychology through self-resolution, and also showed his broad-mindedness, so that the atmosphere of the meeting would not be stiff.

During the reign of Emperor Qianlong in the Qing Dynasty, a provincial examination was held in Guangdong. A candidate named Xie Qizuo was ninety-eight years old with gray hair and still had to take the examination.When the examiner rolls the roll, he finds that he is very old, and advises him to go home and hug his grandson, so that he can live happily ever after.Helplessly, Xie Qizuo is determined and must take the test. God paid off, Xie Qizuo was finally on the list and won the Juren.The old man was full of sorrows and joys, and wrote a poem titled "Old Woman Married", and laughed at himself.Poetry goes:

Year ninety-eight, I am ashamed to be married; Peanut noodles in the mirror, The mirror is full of snow. This self-deprecating poem objectively reflects Mr. Xie's troubles and sorrows after going through the examination room, being unsatisfactory and making people laugh. Using this self-deprecating poem can not only comfort himself, but also avoid other people's jokes, which can be said to kill two birds with one stone. Here is another example of using self-deprecating, tactfully rejecting others, and making others accept: Once, Lincoln was invited to a newspaper editorial meeting, and the chairman of the meeting asked Lincoln to speak.However, Lincoln knew little about editorial affairs, and he was afraid that he would not be able to make a speech. If he refused to speak directly, he would shame the chairman of the conference in public. So Lincoln had an idea and used self-deprecating methods to tell everyone such a story story:

Once, he came across a woman riding a horse in the forest, and immediately stopped to make way for her.But the woman stopped too, and stared at him intently. woman said: I just now believe that you are the ugliest person I have ever seen. He said: You are probably right, but what can I do? woman said: Of course, your ugly appearance cannot be changed, but you can still stay at home and not come out! At this point in Lincoln's story, everyone burst into laughter.The president of the convention also understood Lincoln's ulterior motives and no longer insisted on his speaking. To sum up, in life, proper use of self-deprecating language can make your embarrassment, confusion, and sigh be erased with a relaxed smile, get rid of the predicament, and add a lot of charm.

Of course, self-deprecating also needs to judge the situation, use the camera, and must not be cynical, use it indiscriminately, and lose self-esteem and self-love.For example, it should not be abused in serious occasions such as defenses, seminars, and investigations.