Chapter 11 home after divorce

For a while after my parents separated, we figured out how to keep things the same.But neighbors don't allow it.The town is like a metronome, with a slight flick, the rhythm changes.People in the town are kinder to my sister and me.When we saw a doctor, the clinic would give each of us an extra lollipop; when we bought ice cream, the scooped ball was very large.We met a few old ladies on the side of the road, and they would grab our shoulders and ask solemnly: How are you two children doing recently?For us, it's a question grown-ups ask.The child's questioning rule is: What are you doing recently?

Others are very kind to us, but not to my mother.People at that time did not get divorced.I don't know any children who have experienced the divorce of their parents.The separation of husband and wife means some kind of scandal, at least in our town where one of the couple is condemned. The blame fell on my mother.Mainly because she is here.No one knows what happened between Lane and Percy, but Lane is gone and Percy is here to stand trial.She doesn't seek pity from others, she doesn't cry on their shoulders, but that doesn't help people's attitudes toward her.To make matters worse, she was still young and beautiful.To a woman, she is a threat; to a man, she is an opportunity; to a child, she is a weirdo.When you think about it, none of these three options is a good thing.

After a while, I noticed a change in the way people looked at my mother.When we were pushing shopping carts to the supermarket; or during the first year of their divorce when she drove my sister and me to school in white nurse uniforms, white shoes, and white socks.She would always get out of the car and kiss us and say goodbye.At this time, I will be sensitive to other mothers staring at me.Roberta and I felt uncomfortable, and we both ran for the school gate as if to flee. Mother one.One day she bent down and brought her face closer. don't want.This time I said it and stepped aside.

What not to do? That's me shrugging my shoulders and stepping back.Just don't. I couldn't look at her, so I looked at my feet.She paused for a moment, then straightened up.I heard her sniffling.I feel her rubbing my hair. By the time I raised my eyes, her car had already driven away. One afternoon, a friend and I were playing catch in the church parking lot.Playing around, the two nuns opened the back door of the church.My friend and I thought we had done something wrong and were too scared to move.The two nuns gestured for me to come forward.Each of them held an aluminum tray in their hands.I stepped forward and smelled meatloaf and green beans.

take it.A nun said: Give it to your family. I don't understand why they give me food.But it seems like you shouldn't be saying no to the nun, thank you, so I took the tray and walked home with it.I thought, this must be something specially ordered by my mother. What's this?I went into the house and she asked me. Two nuns gave it to me. She lifted the waxed paper from the tray and sniffed it. Is that what you asked them for? no.I'm playing catch. You didn't ask for it? No. We don't need food, Charlie.We don't need handouts from others, and if you think we do, you're wrong.

I started to defend myself.I don't know much about handouts, but I get the feeling that only certain people get handouts from others. It's not what I asked for!I protested: I don't like lima beans at all! We look at each other. It is not my fault.I said. She took the tray from me and threw it down the sink.She spooned the patty into the garbage grater that drained from the sink.Then there are green beans.Her movements were violent and violent, and I couldn't take my eyes off her.She stuffs all the food into the small, round grater inlet.She turned on the water, and the grinder began to boom and boom.The volume goes up to show that the food has been ground.She removed the cover with the magnet mechanism, turned off the water, and dried her hands on the apron.

Well, she turned and faced me: Are you hungry? The first time I heard the term divorced woman was after a Major League Baseball game.The coaches threw the bats in the back of an SUV.The father of a player on the other team accidentally picked up my bat.I ran up and said: That's mine. Yeah?He rubbed the bat in his palm. right.I brought it here by bicycle. He probably became suspicious, because most of the children came with their fathers. All right.He handed me the bat.Then he squinted at me: You are the child of that divorced woman, aren't you? I looked at him without saying a word.Divorced woman?As weird as it sounds, that's not how I see my mother.Guys used to ask me: Are you Ryan?Bernato's child, isn't it?Now I'm not sure which identity is causing me the most trouble, the son of a divorced woman, or the son of those two people who are no longer.

How is your mother doing?he asks. I shrugged.She is doing well. Yeah?He said.His eyes traveled around the field and then came back to me.Does she need help with the rough work at home? I felt as if my mother was standing right behind me and I was the only thing standing between them. She is doing well.I said it again. He nodded. If we sometimes feel mistrustful of other people's nods, then I am. I knew the word divorced woman that day; and I remember well the days when I hated it.My mother came home from get off work and sent me to the supermarket to buy ketchup and bread.I decided to take a short cut and pass through multiple backyards.As I walked to the side of a brick building, I saw two older children from the school huddled together.One of them, a beefy boy named Leon, had a lump on his chest.

Hi Bernato.He spoke quickly. Hi Leon.I said. I look at the other kid: Hi, Luke. Hi Chick. where are you going?Lyon said. Fanari Market.I said. Is that so? yes. He let go, and it turned out that he was holding a telescope. What is this thing for?I said. He turned his face to the woods.This is military equipment.He said: It's a telescope. Can be magnified twenty times.Luke said. let me see. He handed the things to me and I attached the binoculars to the eyes.It was still hot around the telescope frame.I moved the binoculars up and down and saw the chaotic sky, then the pine forest, then my feet.

They'll use it in battle, Luke said, to find out where the enemy is. It belongs to my dad.Lyon said. I hate hearing that word.I returned the binoculars to him. goodbye.I said. Leon nodded. goodbye. I move forward, but my mind is ups and downs.Something is wrong.Leon turned to look at the speed of the opposite woods, it was too fast, do you understand?So I went around in circles, back to the back of the brick building, and hid in the hedge.What I saw still makes me uncomfortable to this day. The two of them were close together, not looking at the woods, but facing the other direction, facing my house.They took turns looking at my house with binoculars.I followed their line of sight and saw the glass window of my mother's bedroom.I saw the figure of my mother moving behind the panes, her arms raised above her head, and I immediately thought: home from get off work, change, bedroom.I feel cold all over my body.Something went from my neck all the way down to the soles of my feet.

Woohoo, Leon cooed under his breath: look at this divorced woman I've never been so angry, never before, and never will.My eyes were bloodshot and I ran towards them, they were bigger than me, but I jumped on top of them from behind them, strangled Leon by the neck, and beat him, anything that moved.