Chapter 19 aftermath

Faith never knows where it will be taken, but knows and loves the One who leads the way. Chambers (Annotation: Oswald Chambers (1874︱1917), Scottish priest and teacher, represented as a daily devotional reading "My Utmost for His Highest".) Finally, he heard a familiar voice as if coming from afar, shouting joyfully: He squeezed my finger!I feel it now!I promise! He couldn't even open his eyes to look, but he knew Josh was holding his hand.He tried pinching again, but the darkness engulfed him and he passed out again.It took a full day for McCann to regain consciousness.He can barely move another muscle in his body, and even trying to open one eyelid seems overwhelming, even if it's rewarded with screams, yells, and laughter.One by one the crowd rushed up to his barely opened eyes, as if looking into dark pits where rare treasures were hidden.Whatever they see seems to bring them great joy, and will spread the word after they leave.

Some of the faces he recognized, but McCann quickly learned that the unfamiliar faces were doctors and nurses.He sleeps a lot, but every time he opens his eyes he seems to get a little excited.When I can stick my tongue out, he thought, they'll probably pass out with joy! He seemed to be in pain all over his body.He was painfully aware whenever nurses moved his body against his will for physical therapy and to prevent bedsores.That was obviously a routine treatment for people who were unconscious for more than a day or two, but knowing that didn't make him feel any better. At first McCann didn't know where he was or why he was in such a dangerous predicament.He can't even remember who he is.Although the morphine improved his pain, which he was grateful for, the medication didn't help.Over the next two days, his mind slowly returned to clarity and he also began to make sounds.Relatives and friends continued to come to wish him a speedy recovery, and perhaps gather some information along the way, but the information did not help much.Josh and Kate made regular visits, sometimes doing homework while McCann napped, or answering the questions he kept asking in the first few days.

At some point, he finally understood, even though McCann had been told so many times that he had been in a coma for nearly four days since he had been in a bad car accident in Josephtown.Xiaona has made it clear that he wants him to explain all this clearly, but at present, more attention should be paid to his recovery status, rather than her need for answers.That doesn't matter.His memory is fuzzy and difficult to distinguish. Although he remembers bits and pieces, he can't put together a reasonable statement. He had a vague recollection of driving to the cabin, but what happened after that became vague.In his dream, Papa, Jesus, and Miss were playing by the lake, Sophia in the cave, and the light and colors of the prairie celebration came towards him like fragments of a broken mirror.Waves of ecstasy accompanied each shard, and he wasn't sure if they were real or hallucinations caused by clashing neurons damaged or erratic, and drugs running through their veins.

On the third afternoon, when he regained consciousness, he awoke to see Willy staring down at him, looking rather displeased. You idiot!Willie growled gruffly. Nice to meet you too, Willie.McCann yawned. How did you learn to drive?Willie growled, Oh, yes, I remember, country kids aren't used to intersections.McCann, as far as I know, you should smell the other guy from a long way away!McCann lay there, watching his friend babble, trying to hear and understand every word, but more than he could.Well now, Willy continued, Cortana was so angry that she stopped talking to me.She blamed me for lending you the jeep to go to that cabin.

So why am I going to that cabin?McCann asked, struggling to clear his mind.Everything is a blur. Willie wailed in despair: You must tell her I tried to dissuade you. do you have? Don't talk to me like that, McCann.i tried to tell you McCann smiled and listened to Willie go crazy.If he had other sparse memories, he did remember that this person cared about him, that being near him made him smile.McCann was startled to feel that Willie was bending over his face. Seriously, is he there?He whispered, then looked around quickly to make sure no one would hear.who?McCann whispered too, and why should we whisper?

You know, it's God?Willie stressed.Is he in the cabin? McCann was amused.Willie, he whispered, it's no secret that God is everywhere.So, I was in the cabin then. I know that, you tofu brain.He cursed.don't you remember anything?Are you saying you don't even remember the note?It was the note you received from your dad in your letter box, when you slipped and fell on the ice and hit your head. At this moment, McCann finally realized suddenly, and the fragmented story began to take shape in McCann's mind.Everything seemed to make sense as his mind began to string together clues and fill in the details of the note, the jeep, the gun, the cabin walk, and the experiences of that glorious weekend.All kinds of pictures and memories began to flow back forcefully, and he felt that he was about to be taken away by those memories, washed under the bed, and left this world.And when he regained his memory, he began to cry, tears streaming down his cheeks.

McCann, I'm sorry.Willie now begged forgiveness with apology.What did I say? McCann reached out and touched his friend's face.It's nothing, Willie, I can't remember anything now.Note, Cabin, Miss, Papa.I remembered it all. Willie didn't move, not sure what to think or say.He was afraid he had driven his friend to a corner by babbling on about the cabin and Pop and Miss.Finally he asked: So, are you telling me where is He?I mean, God? Now McCann was laughing and crying.Willie, there he is!Oh, there he is!Let me tell you slowly.You won't believe it.God!I'm not sure I believe either.McCann paused, lost in memory for a moment.Oh yes, he said at last.He wants me to tell you something.

What?I?McCann watched Willie with a mixture of concern and disbelief on his face.What did he say? He leaned forward again. McCann paused, trying to remember what Dad had said.He said: Tell Willy I like him very much. McCann stopped to look at his friend's face, Willie's jaw clenched, his eyes filled with tears, his lips and jaw trembled, and McCann knew Willie was trying to calm down.I have to go, he whispered hoarsely.You must tell me everything after that.After speaking, Willie just turned and left the ward, leaving McCann to continue to wonder and recall all the memories. When Cortana then came in, she found McCann sitting upright on the bed with a big smile on his face.Because he didn't know where to start, he let Xiaona speak first.She added some details that he was still confused about, saying she was glad he could finally remember some messages; that he was nearly killed by a drunk driver and had emergency surgery for various fractures and internal injuries; that he had been worried that he might be in a long-term coma , but his lucidity had allayed all worries.

When she told the story, McCann thought it was really strange, how could there be a car accident just after spending the weekend with God?Isn't the seemingly random and chaotic life what Dad does? Then he heard Xiaona say that the accident happened on Friday night.You mean Sunday, right? Sunday?Do you think I don't know what day of the week it is?The day they fly you over is Friday. Her words confused him, and for a moment he wondered if the events at the cottage had been a dream after all.Maybe it was one of Sha Ruiyu's displacement tricks to warp time, he consoled himself. After Cortana finished her side of the story, McCann began telling her all about what had happened to him.But first, he asks her forgiveness for how and why he lied to her.This surprised Cortana, who attributed his newfound honesty to trauma and morphine.

The story about the weekend he spent, or the story that Xiaona kept reminding him of that day, was slowly revealed, and it took several narrations before it was finished.Sometimes he was overwhelmed by the effects of the drugs and would fall into a deep sleep unconsciously, even occasionally in the middle of a conversation.At first, Cortana was focused on being patient and attentive, trying not to be judgmental as much as possible, but she didn't take it seriously that his babbling wasn't the legacy of neurological damage.But his vivid and profound memory moved her, slowly shattering her resolve to remain objective.There was life in the stories he told her, and she soon understood that whatever had happened had affected and changed her husband dramatically.

Her skepticism gradually erodes, and she agrees to find an opportunity for herself and McCann to be alone with Kate.McCann's reluctance to tell her why made her nervous, but she was willing to trust him on the matter.So Jia Xu was sent out to work, leaving only the three of them. McCann held out his hand and Kate took it.Kate, he began, his voice still weak and hoarse.I want you to know that I love you with all my heart. I love you too, Daddy.Seeing him like this had evidently softened her heart a little. He smiled, then got serious again, still holding her hand tightly.I want to talk to you about Missy. Kate backed away abruptly, as if stung by a wasp, her face darkened.She instinctively wanted to pull her hand back, but it took him a lot of effort to hold her hand tightly.Her eyes flicked around.Xiaona stepped forward and hugged her with one arm.Kate was shaking.Why?she asked softly. Kate, that's not your fault. At this point she became hesitant, almost as if someone had been caught in a secret.What is not my fault? Again, it took quite a bit of effort to say that, but she heard it clearly.We lost Missy.He struggled to say those few simple words, and tears rolled down his cheeks.She flinched again, turning away from him. Honey, no one blames you for that. Her silence lasted for a few seconds, and the tears burst out.But if I hadn't been careful in the canoe, you wouldn't have had the self-loathing in her voice. McCann interrupted her with a hand on her arm.Dear ones, that's what I'm trying to tell you right now.It's not your fault. Kate sobbed, her father's words piercing through her battle-torn heart.But I always thought it was my fault.And I thought you and mom were blaming me, I didn't mean to Kate, none of us want this to happen.But it just happened, and we will learn to live through it.But we're going to learn together, shall we? Kate didn't know how to respond.Feeling overwhelmed, she cried and broke free from her father's hand and rushed out of the room.The tearful Xiaona gave McCann a helpless but positive look, and quickly left to chase her daughter. When McCann woke up again, Kate was lying on the bed next to her, curled up in a peaceful sleep.Apparently Cortana has helped Kate through some pain.When Xiaona found his eyes open, she quietly approached him so as not to wake her daughter.She kissed him and said softly: I believe in you.He nodded and smiled, surprised at how important the words were.He thought: Maybe the drugs made him so sentimental. McCann's injury progressed rapidly over the next few weeks.Less than a month after being released from the hospital, he and Cortana called Tommy, Joseph Township's new sheriff's deputy, to discuss the possibility of hiking back to the farther reaches of the cabin.Now that the hut has returned to its original desolation, McCann begins to wonder if Missy's body is still in the cave.Explaining to law enforcement how he knew where his daughter's body was hidden was tricky, but McCann was confident that no matter what happened, there would be a friend who would just believe it. Tommy was indeed empathetic.Even after listening to McCann's weekend stories and jotting down the highlights of his still grieving father's dreams and nightmares, he agreed to go back to the cabin.He wanted to see McCann anyway.Some of McCann's personal belongings have been salvaged from the wreck of Willy's jeep, and returning them to their rightful owners is a good excuse to get together.So on a crisp and cool Saturday morning in early November, Willie drove McCann and Cortana to Joseph Township to meet Tommy in his newly purchased second-hand SUV, and the four of them headed to the reservation together. Tommy watched in amazement as McCann walked past the cabin to a tree near the start of one of the trails.As McCann explained to them on the drive, he spotted and pointed to a red arc under a tree.With a slightly hobbled gait, he took them on a two-hour hike into the wilderness.Cortana didn't say a word, but her face clearly showed the strong emotions that made her move hard.Along the way, they kept finding the same red arcs in trees and rocks.By the time they reached the great Cobblestones, Tommy had grown convinced, perhaps not of the truth of McCann's bizarre story, but that they were indeed following carefully marked paths that might have killed Missy. The route taken by the murderer.Without hesitation, McCann turned directly into the labyrinth of rocks and mountains. If it wasn't for Pop, they might never have found the exact location.At the top of a pile of rocks at the entrance of the cave, there is a rock with a red mark facing outwards.McCann suddenly realized his father's behavior at that time, and almost laughed out loud. But they did find it, and when Tommy was completely convinced of the facts before him, he told them to stop.McCann understood the importance of the matter, and agreed, though somewhat critically, that they should reseal the hole for protection.They will return to Joseph Township so that Tommy can notify the forensic experts and relevant law enforcement agencies.On the way back, Tommy listened to McCann's story again, this time with a new openness.He also took the opportunity to guide his friend on the best way to face the upcoming trial.While McCann's alibi was flawless, serious problems could still arise. The next day, experts from all walks of life flocked to find Missy's body and bagged the shroud along with everything else they could find.It took less than a few weeks for them to collect enough evidence to track down the girl killer and arrest him.From the clues the killer left for him to find Missy's Cave, the authorities were able to investigate and recover the bodies of other murdered little girls.